


The Polis School

by Misslill15



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:47:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 44,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24755776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misslill15/pseuds/Misslill15
Summary: A story about ex-lovers who attends the same boarding school, that means that Clarke has to see them everyday. Especially Lexa who seem to show up everywhere and Finn who just can't seem to shut up with his stupid comments - let's not talk about the two of them arguing about Clarke either.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Finn Collins/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 248
Kudos: 263





	1. We are family here

”Hi and welcome to the school, my name is Clarke and this is Raven. We will give you a tour and hopefully convince you to stay” Clarke smiled at the new guy in front of her.  
”Cool, my name is Rafael”  
”Thank you for taking over love” Jake smiled at her daughter.  
”Yeah and the principal is also my dad” Clarke filled in as Rafael seemed confused.  
”Raven, behave” Jake looked at the latina that rolled her eyes.  
”Don’t worry Mr.Griffin” Raven smiled. 

”So how did my dad find you?” Clarke wondered.  
”What do you mean?” He asked.  
”Don’t worry, all people attending this boarding school is either an orphan, a runaway or a misfit”  
”Why?”  
”My dad met this old grumpy homeless person years ago who told him about his life on the streets…he couldn’t bare the thought of kids alone and scared so he wanted to create a safe home for them.”  
”That’s nice of him”  
”So…” Raven joined the conversation. ”This is the lovely cafeteria, as every school we have groups but we’re mostly a community. We take care of each other”  
”Friends wont be a problem here” Clarke winked. ”If we continue we reach the library” She pointed towards the huge doors. ”But let’s see the classrooms first”  
”So your dad is basically picking up kids from the streets? Is that legal?”  
”Well, it took some time before his idea came alive. In the end they realized that it’s better to educate and give the kids a home rather than let them live on the streets and probably end up criminal”  
”That doesn’t rely on everyone” Rafael scoffed, he seemed offended.  
”Of course not” Clarke smiled assuring. ”We are not the bad guys here, we are just trying to help”  
”That doesn’t seem like a normal class to me” Rafael looked at the room filled with people throwing each other at the ground.  
”We don’t just teach normal classes here, the important stuff of course. But we also have self-defense classes” Raven smiled and looked proud as she looked at the students practicing. ”Actually I forced them to have this class…but we also have classes that teaches you actually valuable stuff to get a great future. How to nail a work interview, handle your bills, cooking classes - sports”  
”Every school has sports almost” Rafael didn’t seem so impressed.  
”True, well this school listens to your interests. If you want to become a musicians - we will help you. If you want to be a gamer, we will help you. A lawyer? Damn right we will help you. You build up your own schedule basically and focus on whats important to you” 

They continued the tour, Clarke and Raven did everything they could to convince him to stay. Getting the kids here was always easy, but to make them stay was harder. Jake had realized that since he had failed so many times, after a while he asked his daughter to help him - and so far it went great. You could never force them to stay but with the right information it was hard to say no. 

It wasn’t Clarke’s favorite hobby, seeing how much her dad cared about all these kids - maybe it was selfish but sometimes he forgot about her. At least she had a dad and if it made him happy she would continue to do so. Her mother loved this place too, she had been a doctor at the local hospital but was now running her own little private office at the school. 

”Oh look who it is” Raven nodded towards the end of the hallway.  
”How can she be everywhere?” Clarke wined.  
”Who’s that?” Rafael wondered.  
”Satan” Clarke rolled her eyes as the familiar brunette winked at her.  
”Clarke’s ex, her name is Lexa and she truly is an evil bitch”  
”Can we not talk about her”  
”Lexa dumped her when…” Raven started talking.  
”Okay” Clarke interrupted her. ”Let’s continue the tour, come on Rafael”  
”Call me Raf” He replied. 

”Hello girls, whats up?” Bellamy greeted them.  
”Raf, this is Bellamy”  
”Nice to meet you, how does it seem so far? You like the school?”  
”I don’t know” Raf answered honestly.  
”It was hard for me and my sister to accept that we could have a home as well but trust me, best decision ever. Food, roof and a comfy bed to sleep in every night - do I even have to say more?”  
”So you used to live on the streets with your sister?” Raf asked.  
”Yeah, never met my dad and our mom sadly passed away - the system wanted to split me and Octavia so we decided to run away instead”  
”Sorry about your loss”  
”Thank you, me and some boys are gonna play some soccer right now, want to join?”  
”Sure” Raf smiled for the first time.  
”Didn’t we tell you it was easy getting friends here” Raven smirked. 

”So what do you think?” Clarke asked as Rafael and Bellamy walked away.  
”That he might be harder to convince but that Bellamy maybe just saved us” Raven guessed.  
”Is it just me or isn’t he a bit cute?” Clarke chuckled.  
”Didn’t know you had a thing for lost boys” Lexa joined the girls, she always seemed to appear from out of nowhere.  
”Can’t you just leave her alone?” Raven looked at her annoyed.  
”What is the fun in that?” Lexa smirked.  
”If you dump someone you usually don’t stalk them afterwards” Raven did the talking for Clarke.  
”I would call it observation…I mean…” Lexa looked at Clarke with a playful face. ”I didn’t think you would lower your guard that far honey”  
”Okay we’re done here, always a pleasure” Clarke snapped and walked away quickly, Raven rushed up to her and joined her.  
”Don’t let her get to you” Raven tried to calm her.  
”She’s not” Clarke tried.  
”That’s why you clenching both your fists right now?”  
”Whatever” 

Clarke did her best to avoid Lexa for the rest of the day, why did she always play with her like this? Was it just to be mean? To torture her? She was the one of who broke up - why couldn’t she just let Clarke heal by herself. She didn’t want to admit that the brunette broke her heart - she didn’t want her to have that satisfaction. 

She stopped outside of her dad’s office and carefully knocked on the door, to her not so big surprise Anya opened the door to the spacious room.  
”Of course” Clarke sighed and walked past her, she made sure to bump Anya’s shoulder.  
”How did it go?” Jake wondered.  
”What are you two doing here?” Clarke asked - her dad did like all the kids in the school but he sure as hell had a special place for Anya in his heart, it bugged it more than she wanted to admit.  
”I need Anya to take care of some classes for me” Her dad told informed her.  
”You want her to teach but not me?” Clarke scoffed.  
”You know she’s excellent in math, some students need some extra tutoring. She will help Indra”  
”Aren’t you excellent at everything” Clarke sad sarcastically as she gave an evil eye toward the brown haired girl.  
”So, Rafael…” Jake felt the tension and changed the subject. ”Do you think he wants to join The Polis School?”  
”He is tuff but I think we will win him over”  
”Could you send him to my office when you see him?”  
”Maybe you should ask your little pet, she would probably do it”  
”Clarke…Please behave. I asked you, are you gonna do it or not?” Jake used his dad tone now.  
”Fine…” Clarke walked out and slammed the door behind her a little bit to hard. 

She knew she was acting childish but to have all of her dads attention to other kids, feeling sorry for them…he was a father figure to a lot of people at this school - but barely to her. Well, he used to be…but now she could probably run away and he wouldn’t notice for days, she could date some bad boy or girl - sneak out at night - and he still wouldn't notice. 

”Those pouty lips…”  
”Don’t…” Clarke stopped Lexa before she could finish her sentence.  
”If you are gonna keep looking sad all the time…” Lexa walked a little closer, studied her lips. ”You will get wrinkles”  
”Thank you” Clarke sighed. ”What do you want from me?”  
”You and your constant daddy issues…am I right?”  
”No…” Clarke didn’t sound so sure and of course the brunette caught it.  
”Not getting enough attention huh..? You know I can help you with that”  
”Why would I want you to help me satan?”  
”Suit yourself then” Lexa smirked before she started to walk away when Clarke yelled behind her.  
”Why?” She wondered. ”Why do you have to keep messing with me?”  
”I’m not messing with you, I am just…” Lexa seemed to think. ”Keeping an eye on you”  
”You broke up with me, you don’t have to keep an eye on me”  
”Then who will…huh?” Lexa turned around again and this time Clarke didn’t stop her - she was to speechless, what the hell was that suppose to mean. She had plenty of people who looked after her, she was the only one with parents in this building - and she was pretty popular with lot’s of friends. 

Nope - she was not gonna let Lexa get to her head. She walked back to her dorm room, Raven was sitting at her desk studying. She was dressed in her normal sleep wear, shorts and a big t-shirt.

”Finished for the day already?” Clarke wondered since it was barely dinner time.  
”I am working on this project - I need to focus”  
”What are you building”  
”I am trying to build a robot” Raven looked proud with a goofy smile.  
”Sometimes I think you are to smart for your own good”  
”What is that supposed to mean?”  
”You build robots on your free time”  
”You’re just jealous, don’t you have any classes today?”  
”Only this morning, I re-scheduled due to Rafael”  
”You seem grumpy?” Raven knew her to well.  
”Anya was with dad…AGAIN”  
”Why are you so hard on her, she lost both of her parents…and her brother. She was beaten up at her foster home”  
”All the kids at this school has a sad story Raven”  
”Doesn’t mean it’s any less important…he is there for them. Maybe she needs it more, let it cool off”  
”It’s been more and more lately, it’s not just…Never mind I know I am an ass for even thinking like this…and…”  
”And?”  
”I ran into Lexa again, she’s just being hella annoying and I don’t understand why”  
”Ignore her, she probably regret breaking up with you and this is her twisted way of showing it”  
”Like I would ever date her again…biggest mistake of my life”  
”You know what you should do, see someone new. That would be good for you…and also distract you from your daddy issues”  
”Can everyone stop calling it that?”  
”Sorry…Sorry…It’s a good idea though”  
”Fine” Clarke agreed.


	2. Ex lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a party

”Can I sit here?” Rafael interrupted the friends at lunch but he looked directly at Clarke.   
”Yeah sure…” Clarke moved so he could sit next to her.  
”Thanks” He smiled.   
”This is Octavia, Monty…we have Jasper who’s apparently to busy with his game…you met Bellamy and Raven and over there is Echo”   
”Nice to meet you all”   
”Glad you decided to join the school” Raven smiled.   
”Yeah how do you like it so far?” Bellamy wondered.   
”Whats up guys!!” Finn joined them. ”Who’s the new guy?”   
”This is Raf” Clarke told him, knowing damn well he was being jealous right now. The worst part of going to an boarding school is that you tend to get close to a lot of people.   
”Hmm…I am Finn” He reached out his hand for Raf to shake it, Clarke rolled his eyes as she saw the pressure he put in it. ”Clarke’s ex boyfriend”   
”Okay…cool” Raf seemed unbothered and continued eating his ham sandwich.   
”So…there is a party tonight” Clarke looked over at Raf. ”We where all just talking about it, you should join us”   
”And where is my invitation” Lexa stopped as she was passing by the table and overheard the conversation.  
”This is not charity work” Clarke looked at her annoyed.   
”Yeah…we didn't talk to you” Finn scoffed.  
”I know your little man ego can’t stand that Clarke chose me over you but you can at least try to hide you insecure boy screaming inside of you” Lexa said with confident.  
”Says the girl who can’t stop harassing her” Finn scoffed.  
”Okay god please, both of you stop” Clarke slammed her hand in the table getting all of their attention. ”You’re all to much” She grabbed her stuff and left the table, not eager to hear more of them arguing. 

She decided to finish her lunch outside, on her favorite bench with a view over the lake. She placed her stuff next to her before she grabbed her chicken wrap and happy to have another bite of it.   
”That was intense” Rafael sat down next to her.   
”I am sorry about that, it’s not always like this…you just had bad timing” Clarke tried to make it sound better…honestly it was always pretty chaotic with her friends.   
”It’s okay, don’t worry about it” Rafael smiled - he definitely was cute… his chocolate brown skin, puppy eyes that could melt anyone…and a smile of kindness. He was a good guy, Clarke could tell - he had just been through a lot and that forced him to be tuff, to stand up for himself…he was tall with muscles which probably meant he had spent a lot of time working out. To ease aggression probably.   
”Your invitation still stands…” Clarke chuckled. ”If you dare to join us”   
”Yeah if you are there, I am in” He was still smiling before he suddenly stopped. ”Just…” He looked at her with a silly face. ”Any more exes I need to worry about?”   
”Oh stop” Clarke laughed and pushed him gently on his shoulder. ”It’s… complicated but no”   
”So you and Bellamy?”   
”No” Clarke bursted out quickly.  
”Oh…he just seem to look at you like…never mind”   
”We are just friends”   
”Alright” Raf took a sip of his soda. ”I mean I don’t blame them”   
”You don’t?” Clarke wasn’t prepared for the comment.  
”You seem like a cool girl…a beautiful one too, swinging both ways I mean girls and boys must be crazy about you…anyways” Raf gathered his stuff again. ”I have soccer practice…Bellamy sort of forced me to join them…so I gotta go but I see you later then?” He stood up.  
”Yeah…see you later” 

Clarke was a bit surprised by their conversation as she walked back to her room, did Raf mean that he liked her? Or was he just being nice…he was a hard guy to read.   
”What a lunch” Raven scoffed as Clarke walked in.  
”Tell me about it…hey you know what” She was about to tell her about Rafael when the latina interrupted her.  
”I hope Rafael will join us tonight…I mean he is so hot right? I think I will try to flirt with him tonight…I can’t stop thinking about his eyes”   
”Oh…” Clarke swallowed…girl code. ”You should”   
”You don’t seem to excited about it, you should flirt with some one too.”   
”Maybe…” Clarke threw her stuff on her bed before she also threw herself on it.   
”I mean Lexa and Finn arguing today…they are acting like kids”   
”Tell me about it”   
”You should be with someone more mature…like Rafael”   
”Should I be with him?” Clarke got her hopes up for a few seconds.  
”NO! I mean someone like him…not literally him”   
”Not sure if there is plenty of mature men here”   
”Women maybe?” Raven smirked. ”Do you have any more classes today?”   
”Nope”   
”Let’s pre drink” Raven opened her drawer and pulled out a wine bottle that was hidden under a few piece of clothing.   
”I can definitely need some of that” Clarke smirked. 

Later that night Clarke entered the outdoor party, a place pretty far away from the actual school so the teachers wouldn’t notice them - or worse - her parents. It was lit up with lights in the trees, music blasting - but not to loud with a fire placed in the middle. Someone had set up something that looked like a bar where drinks where served.   
”Alright this is pretty cool I must admit” Rafael was suddenly next to her.   
”Right” Clarke smiled she was a bit tipsy from her pre drinking.  
”I am glad you convinced me to stay” He smiled at her.  
”I did?” Clarke locked eyes with him.  
”Yeah…and I mean your dad is a pretty great man for doing all of this. These kids didn’t have a home or family…but now they do.”   
”That’s true…” Clarke’s eyes wondered through all the people and got stuck on Anya who was talking to some other students.   
”So what’s her story?” Raf looked over where Clarke was staring. ”Another ex?” He joked.   
”No…thats my dad’s favorite” She told him.   
”After you I guess?”   
”I wouldn’t be so sure” Clarke sighed.   
”Your father loves you, he speaks very highly of you…I wouldn’t doubt his love for you” Raf tried to comfort her.  
”HEY GUYS” Raven walked up to them with her hands filled with drinks. ”LETS PARTY!!!”   
”This woman” Clarke laughed as she grabbed her drink.

It was a long night of drinking, dancing, games and laughter, as Clarke walked back from a pee break she noticed how Raven and Rafael was making out against a tree. She tried to not let them see her as she sneaked back to the party…of course once she meet a decent person her best friend is into him as well. 

Suddenly she wasn’t feeling very festive anymore, she looked over the crowd - it was definitely less people now…it must be late. She stumbled by the fire sparks, it was almost out but she walked towards the coolers where they kept some water. She grabbed a bottle and put out the rest of the fire. 

Once done she started walking back to the school, her head was spinning and she was glad she saved some water for herself as she finished the bottle.   
”Hey” She knew that voice and didn’t bother to stop. ”I said hey”   
”I know” Clarke kept walking as the girl speeded up next to her side.  
”Rude” Lexa acted to be upset.   
”Leave me alone” Clarke wasn’t in the mood, she was still not over Rafael’s tongue tied with Ravens.   
”I just…you shouldn’t walk alone”   
”Cute…”   
”So…how was the party?” Lexa didn’t stop.   
”Fantastic, can’t you see I had a fantastic time”   
”Saying fantastic even once means you didn’t have a fantastic time”   
”Being here with you is fantastic”   
”I guess I gave you that one” Lexa smirked, Clarke hated that smirk.   
”Didn’t I tell you to leave me alone?”   
”Okay stop…” Lexa grabbed Clarke’s arm and she was forced to face the green eyed girl. ”I am sorry about lunch okay, I just can’t stand him”   
”Thank you” Clarke wasn't very assuring.  
”I just can’t believe you are still friends with him, after what he did”   
”It’s not like we are best friends”   
”But still you can have a normal conversation with him and not me?”   
”You broke my heart Lexa” Clarke didn’t want to sound emotional but she did, the alcohol probably wasn’t helping either.   
”He broke your heart as well” Lexa sounded upset.   
”He’s not you…” Clarke almost whispered before she slipped out of Lexa’s grip and kept going again.   
”It doesn’t make any sense” Lexa was confused.  
”For gods sake, YOU broke up with me” Clarke snapped. ”You didn’t want me and now, what do you want me to do? Be sorry for not wanting to be around you?”   
”You act like I did something terrible to you, I am not Finn”   
”So what was it then huh? You just broke up with me out of the blue - and you want me to believe that there wasn't someone else?”   
”Do you actually think I cheated on you?” Lexa now sounded offended. ”Clarke I would never do that to you”   
”It doesn't matter anymore” Clarke was happy to see the school entrance getting closer.   
”It matters to me”   
”Whatever”   
”Stop acting like everyone is against you, like you are always the victim…The world doesn’t revolve around you Clarke.”   
”I never said that”   
”The fact that you can’t stand seeing your dad with Anya, just because he is nice to her it doesn’t mean his love for you don’t exist anymore - you are the only one with parents here I can’t believe you can’t see how selfish that is”   
”You wanna talk about me about being selfish?” Clarke snapped back. ”Stop being a hypocrite, everything you do is selfish - your heart is cold and evil and only has love for yourself”   
”That’s what you really think?”  
”Did I stutter?”   
”You know what…actually it doesn’t matter. I am not listening to this bullshit - maybe you should open your eyes and see the bigger picture.”   
”And what the hell is that suppose to mean” Clarke yelled as Lexa was now rushing away.  
”Figure it out!” Lexa yelled back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glad to see you like the story so far! :)


	3. Never kiss your ex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke struggle with a hangover

As Clarke woke up the next day she didn’t feel very well, her head was aching and she was in need of water. She reached for a bottle on her nightstand and as the water filled her body she didn’t feel as dry anymore. She looked over at Raven’s bed but she wasn’t there…probably spent the night with Rafael.

Clarke sighed and closed her eyes again, even if she wanted to be upset over Rafael she was more upset with her argument with Lexa. The brunette had really gotten upset but she couldn’t figure out why…why was she so mad at her when she left her? It didn’t make any sense…and what bigger picture? 

She rolled out of the bed and dragged herself into the shower, when she was hungover the cold water always helped her wake up. She don’t know for how long she was in there but when she got out she saw Raven with the same outfit as yesterday.

”Someone had fun” Clarke teased, it wasn’t Raven fault - she didn’t know she was crushing on Rafael as well.   
”He is…amazing Clarke…” Raven seemed to be dreaming about the night again. ”We are gonna go grab breakfast together, I just need to shower and change clothes.”   
”Wow, impressing”   
”He is such a gentleman”  
”You know the drill, if someone treats you like shit they get in trouble with me”   
”Dito!” Raven smiled. ”So…did you hook up with anyone yesterday?”   
”Didn’t find anyone interesting” Clarke shrugged.   
”To bad, maybe the next party”   
”Yeah maybe”   
”So what are you doing today, it’s Saturday after all”   
”I don’t know yet” 

Clarke had no idea but she knew she couldn’t lay around in her bed anymore watching Netflix, she decided after a while to go for a stroll around the school to see if she could find anything interesting to do. It was always quieter on the weekends since people where off, no running around or stressing to classes. 

”Hey” Bellamy was chilling in the cafeteria by himself.   
”Hey, how are you feeling today?”   
”Like I drank to much yesterday” He chuckled.  
”That makes two of us”   
”Are you here for a snack?”   
”I guess so, I couldn’t stand laying in my bed anymore”   
”I wanted to but my stomach didn’t allow me” He smiled.  
”Well enjoy, I’m going to the kitchen”   
”If you want…you can swing by my room later and we can watch something together?” He wondered.  
”Yeah…maybe” Clarke smiled, suddenly she remembered what Raf said about Bellamy liking her - she hadn’t noticed it before but maybe he was right. 

She entered the kitchen and saw the person she least wanted to see today, Lexa was reaching for her favorite cereal. It was annoying that she knew that, she cleared her throat to inform about her presence. Lexa looked at her, not very amused. 

”Don’t worry, I won’t bother you” Lexa rolled her eyes before finally getting a hold of the package. 

It was awkwardly quiet as both of them was preparing their food in silence, every once in a while catching each other starring before quickly looking away. Clarke couldn’t take it anymore - especially not with all the question marks spinning around in her head. 

”I am sorry about yesterday” She sighed, she knew she had been hard on Lexa.   
”Don’t be” Lexa was cold. ”I am sure you meant it”   
”And you didn’t mean what you said?”   
”I always owe up to what I say” Lexa realized Clarke wanted to talk and stopped whatever she was doing and crossed her arms.   
”Why does it have to be like this between us?”   
”You are asking me that?”   
”Your constant comments, stares, winks…just how you are always there no matter what I do”   
”What do you mean?” Lexa seems to relax and let her arms rest on her hip instead.   
”I am trying to get over you but it’s hard when you mess with me all the time”   
”We broke up weeks ago” Lexa informed her.  
”Maybe you can heal faster but I am sorry I can’t…you left me alone in the beginning and then suddenly you where everywhere…you are everywhere”   
”Who said I was over you?” Lexa walked closer and suddenly that smirk was back.  
”Please…stop playing with me” Clarke sighed.   
”I just want you to stand up for yourself, say what you really want to say - feel what you really want to feel. Stop swallowing everyones bullshit including your own”   
”I do that” Clarke tried.  
”Oh, so Raven being all over Rafael…did you even care to tell her you liked him too?”   
”How do you know that?”   
”I know you” Lexa told her.   
”Well he wasn’t into me so it doesn’t matter”   
”His loss” Lexa was closer now, it’s like she was hovering the floor because Clarke could never tell when she was moving.   
”I thought I was a girl who thinks the world revolves around me?” Clarke remember what Lexa had said yesterday.  
”So you do listen to me” Out of no where Lexa grabbed Clarke’s cheeks and collied their lips together, it was one of them desperate kisses. Clarke pulled away.  
”I hate you” She said as she looked into green eyes, Lexa gave her a sad smile.  
”I know” She answered and Clarke was the one to go in for the second kiss - she didn’t know why but probably due to the fact that she was still not over Lexa. 

Once Clarke was back into her dorm room she screamed in her pillow out of rage and confusion - why the hell did Lexa kiss her? Why was she acting like this? Arguing one day and flirting the next? It once again didn’t make any sense. 

Raven just looked at her confused but she let her friend act out and calm down before she asked any questions.  
”Rough day I assume?” Raven raised her eyebrows.  
”I kissed Lexa” Clarke wined.  
”What the hell?”   
”She kissed me first…but then I kissed her again”   
”We don’t kiss exes, never - it’s never a good idea Clarke”  
”I know…we had an argument yesterday and then we ran into each other in the kitchen…”  
”Fight and make up, that was always your thing wasn’t it”   
”Stop it…I am panicking here and you are not helping”   
”Okay, so how did you feel about the kiss?”   
”Like it’s fucking Lexa Woods and I am still not over her”   
”And what happened after the kiss”   
”She walked away”   
”She’s playing with you…for now we are avoiding her”   
”Okay” Clarke agreed. ”That is probably for the best”   
”I mean I told you to find someone new not to go hook up with an old partner”   
”It just happened…at least it wasn't Finn”   
”I am not sure what is worse”   
”Finn is a cheater we haven’t yet confirmed if Lexa cheated on me”   
”Why else would she break up the way she did”   
”There is a thing called loosing feelings”   
”Apparently she’s not over you”   
”You think?”   
”NO…No more Lexa and absolutely no Finn!”   
”You’re right…why do I always end up with losers?”   
”Maybe you’re a loser” Raven teased before both girls bursted out in laughter.  
”Oh shut up”   
”Girls” Jake opened the door and walked in and interrupted their laughter.   
”Have your heard about knocking dad?” Clarke asked him.  
”Sorry” Her dad sat down on Clarke’s bed. ”So…I was thinking it would be nice with a little trip - to get away from this school. It’s only for one night but I think it can be nice”  
”Dad that sounds amazing” Clarke couldn't believe her ears.  
”Glad you like it, Raven do you want to join?”   
”What?” The latina seemed confused.  
”We’re taking the minibus, we can bring at least seven people. Isn’t that awesome?”   
”Oh…So…” Clarke didn’t finish the sentence of course he didn’t mean just the two of them.   
”We are leaving later today and I thought you could chose the other four spots?” Her dad seemed cheerful and also clueless on how disappointed his daughter looked.  
”Shouldn’t it be five?” Clarke asked.  
”Anya was quick to steal a spot”   
”Fantastic” Clarke rolled her eyes and remembered what Lexa said about the word, maybe she was right - you barely never used it as something positive.  
”I’ll ask Rafael” Raven smiled.  
”I’ll check with Bellamy I guess and the guys” Clarke remember how he wanted to hang out later.   
”It’s nothing big, we are going out to Jaha’s lake house - he has some things for your mother I need to pick up for her and I thought we could camp next to the lake…?”   
”Yeah, sure” Clarke nodded. 

Clarke had finished the few things she needed for the trip and instead of waiting around she made her way to her mom’s office. She was just about to storm in like she usually did but the door was halfway closed and she glanced and spotted Lexa accepting what seemed like some pills.   
”Thank you Dr.Griffin” Lexa nodded before standing up, Clarke pretended as she just got there and knocked on the door.   
”Mom?” She casually said.   
”Clarke…” Lexa stared at her. ”Gotta go” She rushed out of the room in no time.  
”What was that all about?” Clarke asked her mom.  
”Confidential love” Her mom smiled at her. ”Nothing to worry about”   
”Hmm…okay. So why are you not joining us to see Jaha?” Clarke wondered.  
”Busy, I asked your dad I didn’t know he would turn it into a field trip”   
”Yeah…I feel like he never have time for us anymore”   
”You know that he loves his job hun…” Her mom hugged her. ”It wont be like this forever”   
”Sure feels like it, I might as well be an orphan too”   
”That’s not fair Clarke, I raised you better than that”   
”I know, I’m sorry…” Clarke regretted what she said. ”Just wanted to say goodbye before we go”   
”I love you, be safe and send all my love to Jaha - next time I will come with”   
”I will” Clarke smiled at her. ”And…I love you too”   
”I know, try to have some fun alright?”   
”Always”   
”They are outside, you should hurry up”   
”Okay see you tomorrow I guess” 

Clarke rushed out and through the long hallways to finally reach the entrance, she was met by the free breeze. Okay this could be nice, a change of environment - and maybe she and her dad could still spend some alone time together. 

She just had to forget about the fact that Lexa visited her mom, that was non of her business but she knew it would bug her until she had answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like the new chapter and let me know what you think so far! :)


	4. I'll owe you one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for a little field trip

”Hey darling, perfect timing - everyone is already here” Her dad smiled at her and helped her put her baggage in the truck.   
”What the hell is Lexa doing here?” Clarke spotted the brunette starring at her from inside the car.   
”Raven gathered Rafael, Bellamy, Finn and Monty…well apparently Jasper needed Monty, they where talking over each other and I am not sure why but I gave up. With the perfect timing Lexa happened to walk by and asked if she could take the spot”   
”Happened to walk by…of course”   
”Sorry…?” Her dad knew they had broken up. ”I mean Finn is here and I thought…maybe you wouldn’t mind”   
”Whatever” She opened the car door, the free spot was next to Rafael who had Raven next to him. Perfect. Fucking perfect, she took back everything she was thinking seconds ago - this was gonna be terrible. She grabbed her headphones, at least she could escape with some great music.

Even if Clarke tried to drown the people in the car talking it was almost impossible, she could still hear Bellamy and Finn laughing loudly about stupid stuff, Lexa commenting sarcastically every once in a while, Raven and Rafael flirting next to her or her dad and Anya talking about some stupid country artist. 

She tried to focus on the trees flashing outside, the clouds moving carefully in the sky and even the never ending road. A friendly reminded to herself to buy more soundproof headphones next time she had the opportunity. 

”CLAAAARKE, HELLO EARTH TO CLARKE” Raven shouted and this time she could not ignore it.  
”What is it?”   
”What’s the point of going on a road trip if you’re gonna act emo the whole time?”   
”I just wanted to listen to some music”   
”You have been for almost an hour and I am tired of having to handle satan by myself”   
”Oh shut up you” Lexa rolled her eyes at the nickname.   
”Be nice back there” Jake shouted from the driver seat.   
”Fine” Clarke stopped her music, it wasn’t working anyway.   
”What are you even doing here?” Finn scoffed and looked at Lexa.  
”Like you are so welcome here” Lexa fired back.   
”Can we please stop, THERE - gas station dad - NOW!” Clarke needed a break.  
”Alright, alright” 

Clarke got out of the car as soon as the engine stopped, followed by the rest of the people in the car.   
”Clarke” Finn yelled behind her as she was rushing as far as way from the car as she could.   
”What the hell is your problem?” She turned around and looked at him angrily.  
”Well did you want her to come?” He wondered.  
”That’s non of your business”   
”We all know that she’s a pain in the ass”   
”Are you supposed to be any better?” Clarke crossed her arms.   
”I didn’t dump you?”   
”No just cheated on me?”   
”Clarke…you know thats the worst mistake I ever made, I apologized so many times - tried to make it up for you”   
”It doesn’t change the fact what you did to me?” Clarke didn’t feel like having this conversation.   
”I know…I just don’t want her to hurt you anymore”   
”Stay out of it, don’t bother me - don’t bother her - okay?!” She didn’t care for his response and started to walk back to the car instead, he seemed to respect the fact that she wanted to be left alone because he didn’t say anything more. 

The rest of the car ride was quiet, mostly because of the awkward atmosphere and everyone was a bit scared to say anything at all. Clarke didn’t mind at all, she could finally enjoy her music in silence, she rested her head against the window and at some point she fell asleep. 

When she woke up they had arrived and everyone but Finn had left the car who carefully woke her up.   
”Hey, we are here” He whispered.  
”Oh…” Was the only thing she could say, adjusting her eyes from her slumber.   
”I am sorry about earlier…and for everything. I know I hurt you and I know it’s not my place anymore to protect you, it just comes naturally…”   
”It’s okay, it’s just been tense the last couple of days. I just don’t understand why the two of you argue so much”   
”We are competing about the same thing…you, I guess that makes us enemies”   
”It makes the two of you look like complete idiots in my eyes, that you can’t behave like grown people”   
”I see that now…I just - been angry with myself because I destroyed what we had - and it was easier to take it out on Lexa”   
”I told you, we have the same friends…we can be nice to each other but it’s not gonna work if you’re acting like this. I can’t just forget what you did but I am trying to not split the group, you are not helping!”   
”How can I make it up to you?”   
”Just…be my friend - stop being this jealous stupid guy that I don’t recognize at all”   
”Okay…okay”   
”I just don't understand what happened with you” Clarke sighed.  
”I’ll be better” Finn tried to smile but she wasn’t amused. 

They got out of the car and joined the group of friends that was preparing the tents, her dad was gonna sleep in Jaha’s guest room to give the kids some space. Clarke counted the tents, it was three of them. She also realized that Anya was missing too and that meant that she wasn’t sleeping in any tent either, she probably jinxed the sofa. 

Why did she even bother to join this when she didn’t want to spend time with any of them? She literally had no friends expect for her dad. Clarke didn’t have any energy to care about that right now, instead she made her way towards Raven.

”What the hell did you guys talk about?” She lowered her voice and looked over at Finn who was talking with Bellamy.  
”I just told him to stop being an asshole… so how’s the tent going?” She didn’t want to talk about it.  
”About that…” Raven looked at her a bit scared. ”You know that I love you and you are my best friend and…”  
”You are giving me compliments, what do you want from me?”   
”I really want to share a tent with Rafael”   
”Okay why is that a big deal” Clarke realized as soon as she finished her sentence and looked over at Lexa who was setting up a tent by herself. ”No…Raven you can’t be serious”  
”I will owe you BIG time…Rafael asked and I…sort of already said yes” Raven was nervous but she also seemed so excited and Clarke didn’t want to take that away from her.   
”FINE…but remember that you owe me for this, you are literally asking me to sleep next to satan”   
”I LOVE YOU” Raven shouted and hugged her tight. 

As they let go of each other Clarke took a deep breath and looked over at the brunette again, she slowly made her way over and the brunette noticed.  
”I guess you’re stuck with me” Lexa smirked.   
”Don’t get any ideas, I’m being a good friend”   
”Or is Raven being a good friend” She winked.   
”OH you” Clarke chuckled, Lexa was being such a prick.   
”See you still think I’m funny” She smiled.  
”Don’t let this get to your head now, let’s get this tent up”   
”Already done sweetie”   
”Damn…” Clarke was surprised as she saw the rest of her friends struggling while Lexa finished by herself. ”When then hell did you learn how to set a tent”   
”It’s not rocket science”   
”For some it might be…” Clarke glared over at Bellamy and Finn that made a mess over at their spot.   
”So…” Lexa bit her lip. ”What’s going on with you and Finn today?”   
”What do you mean?”   
”You talked at the gas station and in the car, whats that all about?”   
”Hmm…I think that’s actually none of your business” Clarke’s time to smirk.   
”Can’t we have a conversation?”   
”Alright…you first, why did you see my mother today?” She was curious.   
”Clarke…” Lexa seemed surprised at the question. ”That’s um personal”   
”Okay so what me and Finn talked about is personal”   
”Fine” Lexa crossed her arms, like she always did when she was either mad, annoyed or ready to start a argument. There was occasions however, when she did it because she was insecure or afraid - Clarke think she caught one of these rare moments.   
”But..you’re okay right?” Clarke asked carefully.   
”No need to worry about it, okay”   
”Really?” She questioned her answer.  
”Really…I’m gonna go find Anya… see you later” Lexa really didn’t want to talk about it.   
”Wait?! Why Anya?” Clarke raised her voice, she did not expect that. ”When did you become friends with Anya”   
”Chill, she’s just helping with something”  
”Anya is helping you? And why are you rushing from the conversation?”   
”I don’t need to explain myself right now okay?” Lexa locked eyes with her.   
”Are you guys dating or something?” Clarke was surprised that she even asked that, she couldn’t help herself but that her ex needed something from the worst person she knew was bugging her.   
”Really?” Lexa crossed her arms again, this time she was annoyed.   
”You know how much I despite her, is this some sort of revenge?”  
”Didn’t I tell you the other day that the world doesn’t revolve around you?”   
”Did I do something to you? Are you mad at me?” Clarke hated that Lexa made her so weak but she still needed answers.  
”Clarke” Lexa always rolled her name in a special way.   
”What am I supposed to think? I don’t want to act like this…I deserve some answers”   
”We talked about this”   
”We never talked about this, just be honest with me Lexa - tell me the truth so I can move on” Clarke hadn’t plan to have this conversation right here and now but when is perfect timing actually?   
”It’s complicated” Lexa sighed but she relaxed her arms.  
”Did you stop loving me? That’s it?” The blonde was trying her best not to break.   
”That’s what you think?” Lexa came closer and grabbed Clarke’s cheeks, she was forced to look into green eyes that was filled with concern.   
”What am I suppose to think?” Clarke whispered she was mesmerized by her gaze.   
”I will explain soon enough, you will understand why I did what I did. I just can’t have this conversation right now. Okay?” Lexa nodded to make sure Clarke understood.   
”Okay” She nodded back.   
”I’m sorry if that’s what you believed” Lexa said quietly, like Clarke wasn’t suppose to hear before she let go of the blonde and walked away.

Clarke was left speechless, this was to much - this whole day had been to overwhelming and she felt so small. She wanted to crawl up her body and cry. 

”Clarke?” Her dad put a hand on her shoulder. ”Are you okay?”   
”No…” There it was, she was sobbing.   
”Come here” He pulled her under his arm and dragged her away from the crowd, she held onto him like a little kid as she let out an ugly cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Helloooo! 
> 
> Hope you like the new chapter! :)


	5. Space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An emotional day

Clarke and her dad had sat down in the grass away from the rest of the people, near the lake - Jake still held his arm around her as she calmed down. She wiped her tear as she watched the still lake in front of her, it was calming. 

”Feeling any better?” He asked.   
”Yeah…” Clarke sighed.   
”So are you gonna tell me what this is all about, I saw that you and Lexa had an heated argument before she stormed off, I also noticed that you and Finn been talking today”  
”I’m surprised you even see me at all”   
”What’s that supposed to mean”  
”You are so occupied with everyone else…especially Anya. Sometimes I feel like you forget about me”   
”I am sorry you feel that way” Her dad looked at her concerned. ”I know that I have been busy but you are my daughter and you are always my number one. I felt like you didn’t need me as much lately, last year it was all about Lexa and before that it was Finn or your friends - you where never really around and I wanted to respect your space”   
”Just because I have a partner or friends doesn’t mean I don’t want you to not pay any attention to me”   
”I do Clarke, all the time - maybe the last weeks…I”  
”Haven’t noticed at all that I was not feeling okay”   
”I’m sorry” Her dad tightened his grip around her. ”I’m here now, do you want to talk about it?”   
”Lexa dumped me…as you know but I don’t think you know how much she broke my heart…and Finn…” She didn’t want to tell her dad that he cheated on her, he would probably go kick his ass right away.  
”What about him?”   
”He hurt me and is trying to make up for it…”   
”You are not telling me something”   
”I don’t want to talk about it right now…”  
”Okay…” He respected that. ”So why are you crying right now, let’s talk about that”   
”It’s been a long day and Lexa…she doesn’t make any sense, she breaks up with me and then tells me it wasn’t because she stopped loving me just now. It feels like we are arguing all the time but I don’t know what it’s about”   
”Maybe she’s not telling you something” Jake suggested. ”Maybe she had to break up with you because of something else rather than you”   
”What could that possible be that she don’t want to tell me, we used to talk about everything”   
”Yeah, I must admit you where great together, she’s a good girl Lexa”   
”It’s just frustrating, that’s all” Clarke leaned her head on his shoulder. ”I miss you”   
”I will be better”   
”So why is Anya sleeping inside the house?” Clarke wondered without sounding mad.   
”She’s…she’s not good with the dark and being outside in the open kind of scares her from trauma but you don’t have to go around and say that to all your friends. Anya is private”   
”Maybe to private”   
”We’re working on it”   
”Okay…thank you for listening”   
”Whenever you need it dear, please don’t hesitate. I want you to feel like you can come to me okay?”   
”Okay” 

Her conversation with her dad really helped, she felt lighter somehow so maybe this trip wasn’t useless after all. She looked over at Jaha’s beautiful backyard, she understood why he wanted to be here - it was a perfect place to raise a family. He used to work at the school but left when his wife got pregnant again, he decided to take a step back - every once in i while he visited or held some awesome speeches. 

Something else caught her attention as she saw Lexa and Finn not to far away from her, they seemed to have a heated argument about something. She rolled her eyes and walked over to them, she wasn't ready for the surprised faces when she approached them.

”For real?” She sighed.   
”Clarke…” Finn looked like a kid who just got caught by a parent.   
”You looked me in the eyes and said you would leave her alone” Clarke was disappointed.  
”It’s not what it looks like, we have um…some unfinished business”   
”Just go” Clarke looked at him, dead serious. She was not having it.   
”But…”  
”For fuck sake Finn, go?!” She raised his voice and that helped as he rushed away annoyed.   
”Did you talk to him about me?” Lexa looked at her, it was weird she looked insecure in some way - uncomfortable and that was not a common sight when it comes to her ex. Something was up with her.  
”I told him to stop picking on you, and I will do the same for you.”  
”Oh” She seemed disappointed.   
”LEXA” Anya yelled and both girls turned to look at her.   
”You’re kidding right” Clarke didn’t care to stay there any longer. 

For the rest of the day she made sure to stay away from both Finn and Lexa, even if they had to do group activities she just decided to ignore them. She was thankful that Raven was there - and since Clarke had agreed to share a tent with Lexa the latina was eager to at least spend the day with her. 

It was fun actually, they went fishing, played some soccer, had a barbecue and just forgot about everything for a second. Maybe her dad had been right, this was good for them - to get away for a day. 

It wasn’t until day became night that reality caught up to Clarke - everyone was getting ready to go to sleep. Both her and Lexa had crawled into their sleeping bags in an awkward silence, they hadn’t slept next to each other for a long time. 

”Don’t try anything” Lexa tried to break to awkward tension.   
”You don’t have to worry about that” Clarke was staring at nothing, trying to avoid eye contact.   
”I meant what I said earlier, Anya is just helping me out with a thing”   
”I don’t wanna hear about it”   
”We are not seeing each other, I am pretty sure she’s straight too”   
”That girl is at least bisexual”   
”You can’t just go and label people”   
”It’s called an gaydar”   
”Fine believe whatever you want to believe then”   
”What is she helping you with?”   
”It’s complicated”   
”Everything is complicated with you isn’t?”   
”I don’t want to fight with you Clarke, please”   
”Sorry…you’re just so…frustrating”   
”I want to talk to you about it but right now I can’t…” Lexa sighed and for the first time during their conversation Clarke turned to look at her, she once again looked insecure. What the hell was going on.  
”Are you sick?” She whispered.   
”No, I just don’t know how to explain it - I need to get it under control first and I don’t want you to get involved” 

Clarke stayed quiet for a while, trying to figure it out - it didn’t go so well. 

”Does it have anything to do with you breaking up with me?” She finally asked.   
”Maybe”   
”Could I have changed anything, done anything different…?” She asked carefully.  
”What do you mean?”   
”To make you…” Clarke breathed. ”Stay with me?”   
”Oh…” Lexa took her time before answering the question. ”No you couldn’t, it was never you and I mean it Clarke, I don’t want you to go around and blame yourself.”   
”Don’t you think you owe me an explanation though?”   
”I will, I just can’t right now”   
”You worry me”   
”Don’t worry about me” Lexa rolled over to her side so her body was facing Clarke and the blonde mirrored her move.   
”Easy to say” Clarke rolled her eyes.  
”I’m just glad you still worry about me” Lexa winked.   
”Satan” Clarke chuckled and Lexa’s smirk face turned to her rolling her eyes instead.   
”Of all the nicknames, I am not that bad!”   
”Easier to hate you I guess”   
”You don’t hate me”   
”I don’t”   
”I know”   
”Raven thinks I should see someone new…” Clarke wasn’t sure why she was sharing that.  
”Okay…” Lexa swallowed. ”Do you want to?”   
”I don’t know, maybe it’s for the best”   
”I can’t stop you” Lexa informed her and of course she couldn’t but maybe she could of given her a reason not to.   
”So…” Clarke was testing her. ”Do you think I should? Move on I mean?”   
”I want you to be happy Clarke” Lexa did her best to avoid the question.   
”And what about you?”   
”You think I should see other people to?”   
”We did break up didn’t we, maybe it’s time we start acting like it”   
”What’s that suppose to mean?”   
”Us - arguing, talking, flirting… that kiss in the kitchen. It’s not really helping” Clarke was honest with her, it was the truth.   
”I can give you space if that’s what you want”   
”I think so, yes”   
”Okay” Lexa gazed into her eyes.  
”Okay” Clarke was mesmerized. 

They stared into each others eyes for a while, Clarke’s flickered to her lips and that broke the moment. Lexa gave her a sad look before she rolled over to turn the other side - away from Clarke. It was hurting and her heart was aching - but she asked for this, she wanted this. 

They couldn’t be in a tent making out that would only fuck them up more and maybe Clarke just had to accept the fact that they broke up. Without any real closure - maybe time would tell. Even if Rafael had been a miss - it didn’t mean she couldn’t give it another try with someone else… it didn’t even have to be a relationship, maybe just a fling.

She had to move on from Finn and Lexa, seeing Lexa with someone else would hurt like hell, and Clarke knew she could get any girl she wanted. Before they started dating she had seen her with a lots of different girls, she didn’t blame her. Lexa was attractive, Clarke had been crushing on her for a while before she dared to talk to her. 

She couldn’t imagine why someone that beautiful wanted to be with her - she always felt so lucky walking the school corridors with Lexa on her arm, all the jealous faces…Lexa was her’s but now she wasn’t. 

Clarke had just asked her to move on and give her space - she hated the idea already but it was probably for the best. 

But out of all the people at school… please let it not be Anya.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey maaa friends
> 
> A new chapter, please enjoy and leave a comment what you think!
> 
> Any theories yet? 
> 
> :)


	6. A new student

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A possible student visits the school

The next weeks was weirdly quiet and calm, Clarke did her homework, studied in the library and attended her classes. Without Finn and Lexa bothering her she actually had time to focus on school. Clarke had never mind learning, she wasn’t a bad student - especially not here at the Polis school. 

She went to a public school before, it was set up with a structure for everyone to follow - apparently everyone had the same goals in life. There was almost no space for expression or individuality, she hadn’t really realized it back then - she had still been young but as soon as she was able to create her own schedule Clarke realized how much time she spent on subjects she didn’t care about at all. Of course, somethings are important and necessary to learn - but not everything. 

She did love her art class, creating art was something she had passion about. It was so relieving being able to color her feelings. 

When her and Lexa used to date, the brunette used to do her homework while watching the blonde create. It was those rare moments she missed, that maybe didn’t seem so important at that time - but now as she was alone she could tell something was missing.

When Finn had visited her it usually ended up with them just making out - he used to get restless after a while. It was never like that with Lexa…well they did actually do it a few times in the studio room - but the green eyed girl enjoyed watching Clarke paint. 

Clarke didn’t want to admit it but she was a bit sad that Lexa actually gave her space, suddenly it felt so real again - it was over. She knew that this is what she asked for and whats best for her so that she can actually move on. 

The fact that she hadn’t even seen Lexa in a few days, or was it a week ago? She couldn’t really tell as time moved slow but fast at the same time. What was the brunette doing, did she actually see someone? Was her and Finn still arguing when she wasn’t around? Was she okay? She was still worried about Lexa’s visit to her mom - if it was just a painkiller for her period or something it wouldn’t be a secret. So what was that all about? 

”Beautiful” Her dad entered the studio art room and studied her unfinished canvas.   
”Thank you” Clarke smiled at him.   
”Glad to see that you spend more time here ”  
”I’m glad I have the time, I missed it”   
”So how are we feeling?” Her dad had actually been around more lately, she was glad that he listened to her.   
”Good, just trying to move on” She told him.  
”Time will heal a broken heart, might not seem like it but it’s an old annoying saying that’s true”   
”What if it doesn't heal?”   
”Well, at least it will get easier to deal with it” He shrugged.   
”Hopefully…” Clarke sighed.   
”So, how does your day look tomorrow?”   
”Full day off classes”   
”Hmm okay…I have a new possible student visiting tomorrow, I was hoping you and Raven could work your magic as always”   
”If she can get her hands of Rafael” Clarke joked. ”I can clear my afternoon”   
”I don’t want to hear about that” Her dad made a grimace. ”She’s still little Ro-Ro in my head”  
”Oh my good I almost forgot about that nickname” Clarke laughed.  
”Yeah well…thank you, you’re the best. What about two o’clock?”   
”Sounds good”   
”Alright hun” He kissed her forehead. ”See you later”   
”See you” 

As her dad left she actually felt done for the day, it was getting pretty late and she was getting hungry. She texted Raven and asked if they should eat dinner together, the latina was fast to reply that she was starving and that they should meet in the cafeteria immediately. 

Clarke made her way down and Raven was already there waiting for her, it was a lot of people there and she realized it was the busiest time for dinner.  
”I didn’t think about what time it was”   
”That makes two us, I guess you can’t control your hunger”   
”Hey bitches” Octavia joined her with her boyfriend Lincoln next to her. ”Everyone seems to be hungry”  
”Tell me about it” Raven looked over at the crowd and queues, it was also loud in there.   
”Bellamy has a table, we could probably fit there” Lincoln informed them.  
”Perfect” Raven seemed relieved. 

They ordered their food and squeezed into the small table where Bellamy, Finn, Jasper and Monty was eating at.   
”So…” Clarke took a bite from her salad. ”Can you be free at two tomorrow?” She asked Raven.  
”Yeah…actually my last class ends at eleven tomorrow”   
”Awesome, there is a new student we need to show around”  
”About time, seems like it was forever since Raf joined us”   
”It’s been a while, maybe my dad managed to sweep all the street kids”   
”That’s pretty impressive though” Bellamy joined their conversation.   
”It is” Raven smiled and as her two friends where talking to each other Clarke couldn't help but glance over the room, searching for someone specific - who didn’t seem to be there.  
”What are you looking at?” Octavia wondered as her eyes searched for whatever Clarke was looking for.  
”Just got caught up in the rush hour I guess” She lied.  
”Or a brunette” Raven suggested, sometimes Clarke hated how well she knew her.  
”Stop”  
”I actually saw her with Anya just before we got here” Lincoln said. ”They where sitting outside”   
”I was not looking for Lexa” She tried again but she couldn’t help but asking him about more information…Anya again?. ”What where they doing together?”   
”Seemed to be homework or something”   
”That’s how it starts” Bell chuckled. ”Study date”   
”Bellamy” Octavia glared at him and his smile disappeared.  
”It’s okay” Clarke brushed it off even if her heart dropped at the thought of them dating.  
”Satan plus a weirdo, perfect combo” Raven tried to make it feel better but it didn’t.   
”Let’s talk about something else”   
”Are you sure it was homework?” Finn asked.   
”Why do you care” Lincoln chuckled. ”And how am I supposed to know”   
”Nah, just asking” Finn looked back at his food and Clarke studied him for a few seconds, yeah? Why did he care about that?   
”I wonder who’s the newbie” Octavia finally changed the subject.  
”Maybe a new hottie” Raven winked at Clarke.   
”The only person I’m dating right now is myself”   
”If we can convince the person to stay…her or he can join the party on Friday - do we know gender?”   
”No” Clarke shook her head. ”And I think I’m not in the mood for a party”   
”Come one Clarke” Almost all of her friends said at the same time.   
”You ditched like everything lately, time to live your life again” Raven wined.   
”I will think about it” She calmed them down. 

That was true, she had not been up to anything lately. She just didn’t feel like doing anything but maybe it was time to change that. A party might be nice, do something fun for once, a carefree night.

The day after went fast, even if she didn’t get much sleep due to the fact that she stayed up watching Netflix - she had energy. Sometimes when she only got a few hours of sleep she felt more awake. This was one of these days. 

When her last class ended she met up with Raven outside her dad’s office, she was actually eager to meet the new possible student. 

”Hey girl” Clarke greeted Raven with a smile.   
”Feel’s like I haven’t seen you today” The latina hugged her.   
”You haven’t, you where still sleeping when I left this morning”   
”That’s why it’s been so boring”   
”Anything fun happened today?” Clarke started some small talk as they knocked her fathers door.   
”Come in” He yelled.  
”Nothing really, Raf is excited about the party on Friday”   
”I decided to join you guys” Clarke smiled.   
”That’s awesome” Raven cheered.  
”Not sure if I like the sound of this” Jake looked at them.   
”You know that we behave” Raven said polite.   
”At least I let myself believe that” He shook his head. ”Thank you for changing your schedule Clarke”  
”No worries, should we head down?”   
”Yes” 

They talked about their day as they walked side by side down the stairs to the big entrance, students greeted her father with big smiles on their faces - he was sort of a legend here and Clarke always felt so proud when she witnessed the impact her dad had. They had respect for him and appreciated the chance at attending the school. 

”Hey Jake” Anya greeted him, she knew there was no point in saying hello to the girls.   
”Hi, I’ll just greet the new kid, you can wait in the office” He told her.  
”Sure thing” She didn’t stay for long.   
”What are you guys doing?” Clarke asked.   
”I am helping her finding her brother” Jake said.   
”Oh..” Clarke thought Anya didn’t have any family left. ”Didn’t know she had a brother”  
”Sort of new information, not really my place to share”   
”She’s gorgeous” Raven bursted out randomly and Jake and Clarke looked at the direction, must be the girl they having the tour with.   
”That’s her” Jake told them. ”Hey” He yelled louder for her to notice them.   
”Hey Mr.Griffin” She greeted him.  
”Oh please call me Jake” He smiled. ”Was it easy to find the place?”   
”It’s was kind of hard to miss, this place is huge”   
”True” Jake chuckled. ”So I will hand you over to these two girls who will show you around and then we will meet up in my office… they will take good care of you don’t worry”   
”Okay” She looked at Raven and Clarke who nodded.   
”This is my daughter Clarke” He pointed at her. ”And this is Raven”  
”Nice to meet you” Raven smiled. ”You will love this place.   
”What’s your name” Clarke reached her hand.  
”I’m Costia” She took her hand and smiled, she sure was beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoooola! 
> 
> Having so much fun with this story - I already have three finished chapters for you all! haha! 
> 
> Let me know what you think in the comments! :)


	7. Beer pong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another party!

Friday came fast and before Clarke knew it she was dressing up, she wanted to look sexy tonight. She had her favorite skin tight black dress, short but not short enough to see anything you weren’t suppose to see. Full make up on and red lipstick, her hair curled and a highlighter brighter than her future. 

”Damn girl” Raven cheered her on while finishing the last of her beer. ”I’m gonna look like a potato next to you”   
”You’re gorgeous”   
”I want to be hot” Raven wined.  
”You are hot” Clarke opened two ciders and handed one to Raven. ”Cheers”  
”Cheers babe, let’s get you some tonight”   
”Maybe” Clarke winked. 

Shortly after they finished their cider and had some laughters together they made their way down to the usual party spot in the woods. This time it was filled with lights in the trees, a bonfire like always and Jasper was standing behind a DJ booth. He loved that shit and seeing his happy smile made Clarke smile at him, she raised her glass filled with vodka and orange juice to him who return the gesture. 

”Wow girls, looking fire” Rafael greeted them, Raven and him shared a quick kiss. Clarke was glad she had lost all interest in him. Seeing how happy they where together was a deal breaker.   
”Hi” Costia greeted them, she had been easy to convince - she basically didn’t need any. Seemed like she was just glad to get away from the streets.   
”Who’s this” Lexa came out of nowhere like always and studied Costia up and down.   
”My name is Costia, I’m new here” She smiled.   
”I figured…Clarke” Lexa looked at her, her eyes went wider as she saw her outfit - but Clarke drooled the same way over her. Lexa was wearing skinny black jeans, a black shirt with cleavage with her leather jacket that Clarke found a bit to sexy. Her brown hair was gathered at one side - and with the make up she looked stunning. Clarke always said she didn’t any because Lexa was naturally beautiful - but the rare occasions when she did put make up it was breathtaking.   
”Stop eye fucking each other” Raven interrupted them, she was glad Costia had left to get a drink.   
”We’re not” Clarke rolled her eyes.  
”I’m gonna go get another drink” Raven left them alone.   
”Haven’t seen you in a while” Clarke looked at her ex.  
”You wanted space, you have it”   
”Yeah” Clarke wasn’t sure what to respond, it was true she did ask for space.   
”So any reason to why you dressed up like this”   
”It’s a party” Clarke shrugged.  
”Well…there is party outfits and then there is I want to get laid outfits”   
”I don’t see where I asked for your opinion though”   
”I hope you find what you’re looking for”   
”Take care Lexa” Clarke wasn’t here to fight or argue, she turned her heel and started to walk away from her ex.  
”Hey” Lexa yelled at her so she had to turn around. ”You look great” She didn’t stick around for Clarke’s answer and they both walked their separate ways. 

The party was a good idea, Clarke had fun with her friends - she and Octavia had been teaming up on beer pong and had won every round. 

”Do you think we can make a career out of this?” Octavia laughed.   
”I hope so” Clarke agreed. ”We’re amazing”   
”So girls, are you cheating or what’s the deal.”   
”Are you to scared to play against us?” Clarke teased.   
”Actually, I have seen you play. I will lose for sure” He chuckled.   
”Good boy” Octavia smiled.   
”You’re Clarke right? I’m Wells”   
”Wait..you’re Jaha’s son aren’t you?” Clarke smiled.   
”It’s pretty weird that you are friends with my dad” He laughed. 

It was true, she had grew up knowing Jaha her whole life but never really met his kids, it was probably because he never took them to the school. They lived pretty far away with their mom - she met them a few times when she was younger but that’s it.

Her dad had informed her about Wells attending the school, Jaha was against it at first due to the fact that Wells had a family and a home.

”So you got what you wanted I guess?”   
”Yeah, I won’t lie about my background but I rather not go around and scream it my first days here”   
”Wait what?” Octavia was confused.   
”It’s Jaha’s son”   
”I just really love this school, my dad loves it and I heard so much about it - this is the place I want to be”   
”I think it’s cool, I don’t know why your dad would be against it really” Clarke told him.  
”I think he is just jealous” Wells laughed. ”He miss it”   
”We miss Jaha” Octavia informed him. ”Maybe he will come visit more now that you are here”  
”Maybe” He smiled.   
”I need to go find Lincoln but maybe we can go for another round in a while?” Octavia looked at Clarke.  
”Yeah for sure, see you later”   
”So, want to grab a beer with me?” Wells asked, he had a beautiful smile, chocolate brown skin and strong arms - she was curious to know what was underneath his clothes… probably a six pack.   
”Yeah” Clarke smiled, she remembered that today was all about having fun. 

They grabbed two beers from the cooler and sat down by the fire, they could almost see all over the party from here. They both watched the crowded area for a while, enjoying the music and everything that was going on around them.

”How long have you been here?” Clarke asked.  
”I got here in the beginning of the week”   
”Why didn’t you come and say hi?”   
”I actually didn’t see you much, once in the cafeteria but you where with your friends”   
”Oh, yeah I spent a lot of time in the studio painting”   
”That’s cool, maybe you can show me some of your stuff someday?”   
”Sure” Clarke smiled.   
”Are you cold?” Wells saw how she was almost hugging herself.  
”I’m fine, we’re close to the fire”   
”Here” He took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders. ”Don’t be silly”   
”Thank you” Clarke was weak for nice gestures.   
”So the famous Clarke Griffin, what do I need to know about you?” He smiled.   
”There not much to say” She chuckled. ”I love art, I would do anything for my friends, I am stubborn and this is my first party in weeks”   
”Interesting, I am more an active guy would be fun to explore my creative side but to be fair I don’t think I have one” He laughed.  
”You have to paint with me then, everyone can do it”   
”But not everyone is good at it”   
”You can always become better”   
”Oh” He laughed again. ”So you’re saying I’m bad already?”  
”I think you said it” She laughed as well.  
”Deal, I will paint if you come and play basketball with me”   
”I didn’t say I was bad at sports”   
”So it will be a fair game then” He winked.   
”Fair-isch” She teased.  
”Okay…so are you not a big fan of parties or what’s the deal?”   
”No I do like them, just been avoiding my ex or even exe’s lately”   
”Oh crap, wait wait wait let me guess” Wells studied the crowd.   
”Guess what?”   
”That guy with long hair over there, he has been looking over here multiple times since we sat down, he looks a bit pissed” Wells said and Clarke looked over at the direction he was looking and yes, it was Finn.  
”Damn you’re good” Clarke was impressed, she hadn’t noticed at all.   
”You said exe’s though” He seemed to think. ”Do you play for both teams?” He asked carefully.  
”I’m bisexual if that’s what you’re asking” Impressed again.   
”It was a brunette, she looked at you and Octavia playing for a while - she looked proud and smiled at you”   
”Hmm…can you point her out?” It could be Lexa, she was a brunette.   
”Give me a second” Wells had to look at the crowd again to try and spot the person he was searching for.   
”You pay a lot of attention to people”   
”I am new here, I have no friends yet so it gave me some extra time. I had to drink a few beers before I gathered courage to talk to you” He chuckled.   
”Fair enough”   
”There, over there - she is sitting beside another girl on the broken three over there” He pointed and Clarke looked over at the direction. 

It was Lexa, sitting next to Costia - they where laughing together and Costa’s hand was resting on Lexa’s leg. Clarke’s whole body stiffed by the sight, she hated everything about it. She didn’t want to be jealous but she could not help it. 

Sure, she had pushed Lexa away and the brunette only did what she was told and stayed away - but it didn’t mean that she had to go flirt with other girls. 

”Am I right?” Wells interrupted her intense staring and she remember that she was doing the exact same thing, flirting with someone else.   
”Yes that’s her” Clarke didn’t show as much enthusiasm this time.   
”Daaaaaaamn I am GOOD!” He cheered. ”Let me get two more beers to celebrate” 

Clarke didn’t reply, she kept looking at Costia’s hand on Lexa’s leg - it was still there and what the hell was so funny that they kept laughing about. What was Lexa whispering to her ear? 

No, fuck fuck fuck. Clarke had to stop. 

”Here you go” Wells handed her a new beer.  
”Thanks”   
”So…I guess it’s pretty fresh with her?”   
”You do like to guess stuff don’t you?” Clarke didn’t mean to sound mean.  
”I didn’t mean to offend you”   
”I’m sorry…yeah it’s been um complicated”  
”Love is not always easy”   
”Is it ever?”   
”Yeah” He smiled. ”But there is always up’s and down’s”   
”I guess”   
”You still love her?” He asked and Clarke looked over at the brunette and her heart got ten times heavier as they where now kissing.   
”I actually don’t feel so good” Clarke stood up, she couldn’t watch this anymore.  
”What’s up?” Wells stood up as well. ”I’ll walk you back”   
”Thank you, you’re really sweet and we can talk more later - but I want to be alone right now okay?”   
”Okay” Wells didn’t argue and Clarke was relived. 

She was suppose to have fun tonight but instead it felt like she was breaking into million pieces, damn you Lexa Woods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's friday - I feel nice! 
> 
> Here is a new chapter let me know what you think...
> 
> heheh I love angst


	8. That's a weird shape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke deals with the struggles from yesterday.

Clarke just stared at her reflection in the mirror, her eyes where swollen and red - she had cried herself to sleep last night and she hated it. She didn’t want to be sad anymore, she had to move on. Maybe this is what she needed to wake up, to see Lexa with someone else - even if she didn’t like it.

With Finn it had been so much easier to move on, they argued so much and she always had the feeling that he was cheating on her. She had been in love with him but at the time they broke up she was already mentally prepared. Of course, she had cried over him as well - but it was not worth fighting for. He wanted more than her and she didn’t settle for that, she had more self-respect than that. 

She could hate him but she didn’t even want to waste her energy on that, they can co-exist due to having mutual friends but that’s it. She would never trust him again, it didn’t matter how much he tried to apologize or ”fix” what’s he done. He did it, it was his choice and nothing can change that. 

Someone knocked on her and Raven’s door and she knew the Latina would not wake up to open it, that girl could sleep through anything.

”Wells?” She didn’t expect that.  
”Hey…um” He looked a bit nervous and it took a while before he gathered some courage to look at Clarke, he stiffed when he noticed her eyes.   
”What are you doing here?” Clarke’s time to look away, she didn’t need him to pity her.  
”Do you…want to get out of here?”   
”What do you mean?”   
”I just wanted to check on you because of how you left yesterday but I changed my mind, I want to show you something”   
”I don’t know…”  
”Come on, we both knew you need a little distraction. It will be fun” Wells smiled.  
”Fine, give me five minutes to get dressed”   
”Absolutely” 

”I didn’t know you had a car” Clarke said surprised as they sat down in it.   
”So it’s easier to visit home” He shrugged. ”Been driving around to explore the city the past week”   
”Nice”  
”So what kind of music do you like?” He asked as he started the engineer.  
”Do you have any The 1975?” She asked.  
”Spotify sure does” He tapped a few times on his phone and Clarke prayed to god that he wouldn’t chose ”Someone new” by the band - it would hit totally different today.   
”TOOTIMETOOTIMETOOTIME sound fun” He cheered and Clarke thanked the lord even if she wasn’t a believer. 

The drive wasn’t terrible, he had put up the volume so they didn’t have to talk during the ride. Instead they both enjoyed the music in silence while watching the city flash besides them. It didn’t take to long before he parked and they both got out. 

”Thanks for introducing me to a new cool band”   
”You liked them?”   
”I did” He smiled. ”Look at this” He reached out his both arms and made a spin. ”You can see the whole city from here”   
”I actually have never been here” Clarke was quite impressed by the view.   
”Found it by mistake but…” He chuckled a little. ”There is something else” He walked closer to the edge. ”Come here”   
”What?” She joined him.  
”Thats the Polis School over there, can you see it?” He asked.  
”Oh yeah, I see it”   
”Can you also see that… it’s sort of shaped like a um…”   
”Like..” Clarke bursted out laughing. ”Holy shit”   
”It’s not only me right, it’s shaped like a fucking penis” He laughed.  
”What the actually fuck” Clarke cried out another laughter and it felt so good.   
”Worth it right?” Wells smiled at her. ”We go to a penis school” He laughed again.  
”Oh my god, we do” She laughed even more. ”My dad would hate it if he found out”   
”So would my dad” They laughed together again before they gathered themselves. 

”Thank you, I needed this” She smiled at him.   
”I figured” He smiled back. ”So how about some food?”   
”I know a good place that serves breakfast”   
”A lady who knows what to eat, impressed”   
”Duh” Clarke stuck her tongue out. ”I don’t joke around when it comes to food”   
”Respect girl, you will have to be my GPS though”   
”Sure thing” They walked back to the car and she cheerfully talked about their amazing scrambled eggs and avocado toast. 

They had entered the little restaurant and was greeted by the staff as Clarke was a familiar face - she had introduced them to Wells and they welcomed him with big smiles. He had enjoyed the food as much as she did and they shared heartfelt memories off them as kids. As they talked about it they realized they met more than they first thought. 

”Thank you for today” Clarke smiled as they got out of the car that was parked outside the boarding school now.   
”Maybe we can do it again sometimes”   
”For sure”   
”So what are your plans now?” He wondered.  
”I will go check on Raven, see if she’s alive” She chuckled.   
”You’re a good friend”   
”I try” She looked in her bag to grab her keys, wanted to be prepared as they walked towards the entrance.   
”Do your exes hang out?” He asked surprised and Clarke turned her head right as she was about to open the big door to enter the school.   
”What?” She looked over and saw Lexa and Finn, he seemed upset and she looked annoyed. Why where they always like this. ”You know what, I can’t care about that right now”   
”Good for you” He hold the door for her and they walked inside and left the drama behind them.

At least she had tried to forget about it but it wasn’t really working, her and Raven had been watching a movie together that was now over and the Latina had left to see Rafael. She was stuck with her thoughts again. Another movie would be a choice but she wasn’t really in the mood for it. 

Clarke decided to scroll through her social media, it wasn’t much activity from her friends today - probably because everyone was hangover. Due to boredom she made the stupid choice to search up Costia - her profile was nice. Not strange, she was beautiful. There was a story posted and Clarke hesitated to click on it because it was probably from last night. 

After staring at it for a few minutes she clicked on it, first it was a video of just an overview of the party titled ”coolest school ever”. Clarke could not argue with that, next was a selfie of her smiling - okay maybe it wasn't so bad. Another video of people dancing and finally the last part, Clarke swallowed as Lexa appeared. She was laughing and dancing as she finished a beer in one go while Costia cheered on her. ”What an actual babe” Costia yelled as Lexa winked and dropped the empty can on the ground. ”Enough stop filming me” Lexa laughed as she got closer to the camera and hold a hand to block the camera and then it was over. 

Clarke was numb, she didn’t know what to feel about it. Actually she knew she hated it but she couldn’t feel any emotions right now. She knew Costia was a girl Lexa could get fond off. 

”Fuck” Clarke breathed as she locked her phone, why did she torture herself like this and why did she want to knock on Lexa’s door and scream at her. What if Costia was there now? Could she go over and blame it on that she saw her with Finn earlier? 

It was a dumb idea but Clarke’s body was taking control over her, she was already on her way. She didn’t know why she needed to see her ex so bad, maybe so Lexa wouldn’t forget about her? To remind the brunette that she still exist? No time to change her mind now, she had already knocked on the door.

”Clarke?” Lexa looked confused and sleepy.   
”Really?” Clarke stormed into the room, she wanted to see if it was a certain someone in the room. It wasn’t.   
”What are you doing here?” Lexa closed the door behind her and sat down on her bed, she had her own room. ”Or what are you looking for?”   
”I saw you with Finn earlier” Clarke crossed her arms.   
”I gave you space but I can’t stop people from talking to me”   
”Apparently not” Clarke scoffed.  
”What is this really about?” Lexa softened, she seemed tired…maybe she had a long night?  
”YOU” Clarke began to raise her voice but as she looked into Lexa’s green eyes she realized she couldn’t scream at her. ”What where you and Finn talking about?”   
”Clarke…” Lexa looked away, breaking the eye contact. ”You know how we argue…the usual”   
”Why do you guys always have to argue?” Clarke was upset.  
”If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t argue with him, do you see any of my exes attacking you? Do you think I want to have him bothering me all the time?” She raised her voice. ”I would do anything to make it stop but he keeps coming after me, so you tell me Clarke. What should I do because apparently anything I do is wrong”   
”Fine - I’ll talk to him again” Clarke was not ready for that but the brunette had a point.   
”You don’t have to take my fights”   
”It seems like I do”   
”I am handling it, okay?” Lexa raised her eyebrows to make herself clear.   
”Good” Clarke didn’t know what else to say, she wasn’t really sure what she was doing here the first place.   
”Just spit it out” Lexa stood up. ”There is something else bothering you”  
”No” Clarke shook her head as she was the one avoiding eye contact this time.  
”So…” Lexa got closer. ”You storming out of the party yesterday and your new knight in shining armor bashing me has nothing to do about it?”  
”What are you talking about?” Clarke had to look at her now, she was confused.  
”The new guy, he said you left after you saw me with Costia” Lexa informed her.  
”What the fuck Wells” Clarke rolled her eyes, why did he do that?   
”He was nice don’t worry about it, after I kindly told Costia off - he found me later that night and informed me. That I should know that you probably still had feelings for me, a heads up so I shouldn’t be fooling around in front of you” Lexa was calm.  
”Wait what, you turned down Costia?” Clarke wondered.   
”Yes - but maybe I should give her a chance right?” Lexa seemed mad. ”I am getting tired of other people coming to defend your honor, they know nothing about us - or me for that matter. I am seeing a common pattern here and that’s you”   
”I am not forcing these people to talk to you, I am telling them not to”   
”But yet still here we are, you wanted to move on so maybe I should too”   
”Why did you break up with me in the first place?” Clarke bursted out.   
”Clarke I think you should go…” Lexa lowered her voice. ”This is getting toxic and I don’t want you to be sad anymore. Forget about me”   
”That’s not an answer, what are you keeping from me?”   
”I never meant to hurt you, you need to stop obsessing about this”   
”If you want me to go…I’ll be gone and it will be over for good - or you can talk to me?” Clarke pleaded. ”Just…talk to me” She was about to break again.  
”It’s..” Lexa hesitated and her concern face turned to stone.   
”Come on…” Clarke didn’t want this to be the end.  
”Leave” Lexa looked at the door. ”You and me are over” She said with a firm voice as she locked eyes with blue.  
”Fuck you Lexa” Clarke swore as she slammed the door behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really glad to see that a lot of you like the story! :) I know it's a lot of angst and that it might be hard to understand Clexa right now...but that's sort of the point! 
> 
> I hope you like this chapter, I love to read your thoughts or ideas so hit me up! 
> 
> Take care! :)


	9. English class

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> School and other normal things...or not.

”I think I really upset her” Clarke sighed.   
”I just don’t understand Lexa” Raven said.  
”She is truly hiding something from you” Octavia seemed to think.   
”What could it possible be?” Clarke whined. ”It doesn’t matter now though…it’s over. She dead ass looked me in my eyes and said it, I have never seen her so cold”   
”Maybe it’s for the better” Raven hugged her. ”We are here for you anytime you know that right?”   
”She haven’t given you a reason to move on but now she did” Octavia hugged her as well.   
”It’s just…hard” Clarke let go of her friends. ”But I guess you are right, it’s time I actually let go off her”   
”Are you gonna confront Wells about what he did?” Raven wondered.  
”I don’t think he meant any harm, he don’t know anything about our past. I will tell him to not get involved but he is a nice guy”   
”Maybe…he can distract you?” Octavia carefully suggested.  
”I don’t think I should get involved with anyone at the moment - but he is nice company”   
”Self-love sis” Raven preached.  
”Finn on the other hand, I will confront him” Clarke told them. ”I don’t want him to harass Lexa anymore, she is right. It’s my fault he’s up her ass all the time”  
”Yeah like what the hell is his problem?” Octavia rolled her eyes. ”He’s done enough” 

It had been a week since her last conversation with Lexa, she hadn’t seen the brunette since - maybe because she tried to avoid her. Clarke knew her ex pattern and schedule, it was easy not to see her if she really wanted too. 

It was also easy to locate Finn if she wanted to but she had put that on hold as long as possible - Clarke wasn’t really excited to talk to him but she knew that she had to. She made her way over to the boys locker room, he had soccer on Tuesdays and he should be done any second now. 

She sat down outside against the wall and waited for him the get done, he was usually quick to shower. Clarke looked up every time the door opened but it was never him, eventually Bellamy walked out and he spotted her on the floor.

”What are you doing here?” He wondered.  
”Waiting for Finn”   
”Why?” He questioned.   
”I need to talk to him, is he still in there?”   
”I haven’t seen him all day” Bellamy shrugged. ”It’s not like him”   
”It’s not” Clarke was surprised as she stood up with the help of Bellamy.   
”He has been acting weird lately” He informed her.   
”Do you have any idea where he could be?” She asked.   
”No, not really. Do you want to go find him? I can help”   
”Never mind, it can wait” Clarke was just glad to put it on hold even if she was a bit curious on where he could be.  
”Alright, see you later I guess?”   
”Yeah” 

As she was close to the arena she decided to swing by her moms office since it was close, most accidents happened on that field so it was convenient.   
”Hey mom” Clarke didn’t knock.   
”You know I can have patients in here” Abby told her.  
”Sorry” She sat down in front of her mom.   
”How are you holding up dear?” Her mom worried about her, Clarke had told her everything.   
”One day at the time”   
”You didn’t meet me for lunch earlier”   
”I wasn’t hungry”   
”You have to eat…and a heads up would off been nice”  
”Sorry” Clarke felt exhausted.   
”Maybe you should take some days off…” Her mom suggested.   
”I can’t skip school due to a broken heart”   
”If it affects your health then yes you can”   
”I’m fine mom, I need the distraction”   
”Okay okay, just if you need a day off that’s fine”   
”Okay” Clarke nodded.   
”So…what are you doing here?”   
”I was about to talk to Finn but he didn’t show up at practice, thought I could swing by. Do you know anything?” Clarke asked.  
”He haven’t been here if that’s what you’re asking” Her mom informed her.  
”It’s just not like him”   
”Might be sick” Abby shrugged. ”Happens to best of them”   
”He is far from that”   
”You know what I mean”   
”Yeah I guess…what about…Lexa?”   
”No honey…She haven’t been around lately… go get some rest. If you want you can stay with us for the night? I can make you a nice cup of tea, I made your favorite cookies… the ones with chocolate that you love”  
”Thanks mom but…maybe another day” Clarke wanted to be in her own bed.  
”Okay”  
”I should head back, let me know if you hear anything” Clarke told her.   
”I will, love you”  
”Love you too” 

The next day Clarke spotted Finn in English class that they shared and sat down next to him, he had swollen eyes and dark circles around them. 

”Rough night?” She asked.  
”Hmm” He didn’t look at her.  
”Not that chatty I assume”   
”How come you want to sit next to me?” He mumbled as the rest of the class was taking their seats, this was on off the few classes she shared with almost all of her friends. Raven and Octavia looked strange at her as she didn’t sit down at the usual spot next to them. Even Monty and Jasper seemed confused and whispered something to each other.  
”I tried to catch you yesterday after practice” She told him.  
”Oh..” Finn looked at her and that’s when she noticed how bad he really looked, his hair was messy, his face pale and eyes almost red.   
”Damn Finn, what happened?” She asked but lowered her voice as the teacher walked in. She also noticed how Lexa was glaring at her as she entered the room.   
”I was sick that’s it” He told her. ”Might not be fully recovered”   
”Okay I need to talk to you”   
”Whenever”   
”QUIET DOWN” Their teacher Indra yelled. ”Come on come on come, it’s so early where is this energy coming from?”   
”About you still harassing Lexa” Clarke lowered her voice even more.  
”Of course” He scoffed. ”It’s always about her”   
”It’s about you not letting go of me”   
”So what did I do this time?” He sighed.  
”Finn, Clarke?” Indra looked at them and the whole class turned to their table. ”Want to share anything with the class?”  
”Sorry” Clarke looked at her.   
”Maybe you Finn can start with a short summary of the 20 pages you where supposed to read until today?”   
”Ehm…With all of my respect, I have been sick and..”   
”Enough” Indra told him off. ”Did anyone do their homework?” She asked the class.  
”If you don’t mind” Costia raised her hand.   
”Of course not” Indra smiled at her and Clarke noticed how she sat down next to Lexa. The brunette was looking back at her but as soon as she noticed the blonde staring at her she looked away. 

As the class ended Clarke followed Finn and stopped him a bit further away from everyone so that they could finally talk.  
”I don’t know what’s going on with you, I don’t want to argue - I am just begging you. Me and Lexa are over, please don't mess with her anymore”  
”Maybe our conversations isn’t all about you” Finn told her.  
”Okay, what’s it about then?” Clarke crossed her arms.  
”Never mind”   
”How are you really?” Clarke was actually a bit concerned, he looked terrible.   
”I’ll be back to normal soon”   
”Okay”   
”I have to go…” He seemed stressed.   
”Fine, go” Clarke rolled her eyes and walked over to her friends that was waiting for her.   
”Did it go well?” Raven wondered.  
”It’s Finn”   
”Good point, just let it be. You tried at least” Octavia told her.  
”Clarke?” Lexa stared at her further down the hallway with her arms crossed.   
”Yeah?”   
”A minute” She asked and Clarke looked at her friend who nodded before she made her way over to Lexa.  
”Really?” The brunette asked annoyed.   
”What?”   
”I told you not to talk to Finn” Lexa relaxed her arms.   
”Since it was my fault I felt like I had to”   
”Clarke you don’t understand…what…” Lexa struggled to find her words.  
”Understand what?”   
”You don’t know what he is capable off, you should stay away from him”   
”I know pretty well” Clarke scoffed.   
”Just trust me on this one” Lexa sighed. ”Stay away from Finn Collins”   
”Care to elaborate?”   
”No I have to run to my next class” Lexa looked at her watch.   
”Queen of mystery”   
”Thank you” Lexa yelled as she was already walking away from her.   
”That wasn’t a compliment” Clarke yelled back and realized how silly it sounded. 

Her friends got closer and the three of them just watched as Lexa walked away.   
”Busy morning” Raven shook her head.  
”You do deserve a break” Octavia looked at Clarke.  
”What the fuck is wrong with people” Clarke swore.   
”You did your part girl, now we can focus on moving on” Raven told her.  
”Hell yeah” Octavia agreed.

Something was going on, Clarke could feel it in her whole body. Something was not right - how was she supposed to just drop everything and forget about this. Finn was acting weird fine but so was Lexa - the brunette knew what Finn did to her way back…why was it so important to stay away now? Was it just because she was pity and maybe…jealous? Or was it actually something deeper than that? 

Clarke knew she should move on but she also craved answers - maybe she had to search for them herself, in fact she was gonna investigate this because something was off. 

”Has anyone of you seen Anya?” Clarke asked her friends and they both looked at her confused, that was not the answer they imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> A new chapter, let me know what you think I love reading your comments! 
> 
> Take care, see you soon ;)


	10. Fights and swollen lips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke is on a mission and needs Anya's help.

”I thought I could find you here” Clarke entered her fathers office, he was not around and Anya was sitting at his desk by his computer.   
”What do you want?” She rolled her eyes.   
”Well…” Clarke sat down in the chair in front of Anya by the desk. ”I need to know what you and Lexa are doing”   
”Ask her” Anya shrugged.   
”She’s not telling me” Clarke crossed her arms, now she knew for sure that they where hiding something.   
”I will not…I repeat… will not get involved in your drama”   
”What if I can get you something in return?” Clarke raised her eyebrows.  
”What would you be able to offer me?” Anya stopped typing on the computer and looked at her.  
”I know that you are searching for your brother, I can help”   
”Wait…” Anya swallowed. ”How do you know about that?”   
”Don’t worry, daddy keeps all your secrets. It’s all I know - and a part from you I actually speak to the kids here. I know whats going on in the streets - and I am pretty sure I can find him”   
”Enough” Anya told her off. ”I don’t need your help”   
”Have you found him?” Clarke pushed.  
”HEY” Her dad entered the room stressed, he was out of breath and a bit sweaty. ”It’s a fight in the school yard…Clarke?”   
”What’s going on?” She wondered.  
”Come with me, I could use some extra hands” Jake started rushing away and the girls followed him.  
”This is not over” Clarke told Anya as they ran next to each other. 

They got outside and students where crowded around two guys pushing each other in a heated argument.   
”YOU PROMISED” Finn yelled as he pushed John, or Murphy as he was called by his last name. Murphy was an awful guy who only spread negative energy and mocked people. What where they fighting about?  
”Back off me” John told him off.   
”STOP” Jake yelled but the guys didn’t care.   
”YOU FUCKING PIECE OFF SHIT” Finn hit him in the stomach, he was furious and without any hesitation Clarke ran towards the fight.  
”Clarke” Her dad yelled behind her.   
”FINN” She raised her voice but he only saw black and didn’t realize she was there. Murphy punched him in the face and it made Finn react immediately - he was about to hit back when his elbow accidentally hit Clarke and she fell to the ground.  
”Oh my god” Finn dropped to the ground to check on her. ”I’m sorry, sorry - so sorry Clarke oh my god you are bleeding. Sorry” He was stressed and Clarke looked him in the eyes.  
”Calm down Finn” She told him. ”What’s going on?”   
”FINN” Jake rushed up to them. ”Clarke are you okay?” He asked her.   
”Yes, yes” She calmed him.  
”You have to come with me Collins, you just hit my daughter” Jake was upset.   
”Murphy, you will have to come with as well” Anya glared at the other boy.   
”Whatever”  
”Clarke” Her dad was stressed and looked at her daughter bleeding.  
”I’ll take care of her” Lexa joined the scene and grabbed Clarke’s hand.   
”Thank you” Her dad grabbed Finn’s arm and pushed him to move forward, Anya and Murphy walked behind them.  
”Come here” Lexa held her hand and dragged her away from the crowd. ”ENOUGH, stop staring it’s over” She yelled angrily at the students. 

They entered the first public toilet that they passed and Clarke sat down on a bench placed outside of the booths.   
”Hold your head up” Lexa informed her as she grabbed some paper and watered it by the sink, she did what she was told and leaned her head against the wall.   
”Are you okay?” Lexa kneeled down in front of her, she placed two fingers carefully under Clarke’s chin.   
”It hurts”   
”Your nose is bleeding but I think it’s fine, you might deal with a swollen lip though” Lexa carefully wiped the blood away and studied the blondes face.   
”Perfect”   
”There” Lexa was done and threw the paper in the bin, still kneeling down. Clarke was seeking comfort and without thinking she rested her head on Lexa’s shoulder, the brunette didn’t struggle but instead she put her arm around Clarke and caressed her back. ”I know” Lexa breathed.  
”Fuck” Clarke borrowed her face in Lexa’s neck and held on to her tighter, it was safe in her arms and she wanted to stay there forever.   
”We should get some ice for that lip” Lexa said calmly.   
”Yeah” Clarke took a few deep breaths. ”Yeah”   
”Come on” Lexa helped her get up. ”I’ll walk you to your mom” 

Lexa did walk her to Abby but she didn’t stay for the visit, Clarke entered the room by herself and her mom took care of her. It wasn’t to bad, her lip was a bit swollen and a hint of purple could be seen. Could be worse tomorrow but the ice probably helped a lot, Clarke slept in her parents apartment that night that’s placed at the top off the school. 

Clarke knew people would stare at her the next day but she didn’t imagine they would stare this much. Even when she caught them looking at her they didn’t break the eye contact. The fight between Finn and Murphy had started to spread - and even worse it had evolved too Finn punching his ex in the face - and people now looked at her with sad eyes. 

She ignored the rumors for now, it would probably blow over soon enough. She was more interested to why they had been fighting in the first place - and she was still fizzy about her moment with Lexa in the bathroom. As they had hugged each other, it was weird but it just felt important. 

As for Finn and Murphy they had gotten away with a strong warning, she had calmed her father - he wanted to throw Finn out of the school - she wasn’t sure if he deserved that, the hit had honestly been a mistake. 

”Clarke” She looked around and watched for the person who had called her name.   
”Anya?” She questioned.  
”How’s your lip?” She asked.  
”It’s fine”   
”Good”   
”What do you want?” Clarke wondered.  
”Can you really find my brother?”   
”Oh…” Clarke had almost forgot but she was still determent to try. ”I’ll do my best”   
”His name is Gustus, it’s all I know - if you find him, I will tell you all you want to know about Lexa, deal?”   
”Deal indeed” Clarke smirked. ”Who would off thought”   
”Indeed, I guess I will have to see you around” Anya walked away and Clarke put the name Gustus to her memory. She knew some kids she could ask around about the name, it was not much but hopefully something.

Clarke took a deep breath as she reached the destination she had been aiming for and knocked on the door.   
”Hey” She said nervously as Lexa opened the door.  
”How are you feeling?” Lexa asked but didn’t open the door fully.   
”Fine, I just um wanted to thank you for yesterday”   
”Of course” Lexa gave her a shy smile.  
”Who’s at the door?” Someone yelled from the room.  
”Oh, didn’t know you had company” Clarke took a step back.   
”Yeah um, Costia and I are studying for a test”   
”I won’t interrupt then” Clarke backed away even more, she felt awkward.   
”Wait” Lexa closed the door behind her. ”It’s not what you think”  
”You don’t have to explain yourself, I just wanted to thank you”   
”Clarke” Lexa yelled behind her but the blonde was rushing from the scene. 

Fuck fuck fuck…that was so awkward she would of known as soon Lexa didn’t open the door completely. Clarke rushed as far away from Lexa’s room and before she knew she was knocking on another door. She had not planned to do it but she felt like it was someone else controlling her body now.

”Clarke?” Wells seemed surprised. ”Haven’t seen you in a while”   
”Busy”   
”I heard about the fight, what an asshole”  
”He hit me by mistake, but well… he’s still an asshole”  
”I bet” Wells chuckled. ”So what’s up?”  
”What do you feel about a little investigation? I need a side kick”   
”Umm…” He was confused.  
”I need to find a guy named Gustus and I might need some help”   
”Why are we looking for him?”   
”Helping a…friend” Clarke cringed at the word, Anya was far from her friend.   
”I mean if I can help, why not” Wells shrugged.  
”Cool” Clarke smiled, she needed a distraction.   
”Come in, let’s start with some google searching” 

Clarke entered the dorm room, it was white walls and basically nothing on them- usually the students decorated their room with color or posters. He seemed to have his own room and the bed was as dull as everything else, a desk placed by the window with a laptop and that’s it. 

”I like what you did with the place” She said ironically as she looked around.  
”Well…I don’t know, I have a hard time making me feel at home here. I’m scared someone will take it away from me”  
”Why would that happen?”   
”Some kids have been up my ass about me going here…like my father warned me about. I just don’t want to settle in to much”   
”Wells, don’t listen to them.”  
”Easy to say” Wells sat down by his computer.   
”it seems like you are already planning to leave”   
”Prepared maybe…I want to be here you know…I will get to it, just taking my time I guess”  
”Hmm…” Clarke felt bad for him but that they could save for another conversation.   
”So do we know anything else about this guy?”   
”Honestly no, his name is Gustus and probably lives on the streets somewhere not to far away”   
”Oh…searching for a homeless guy with a first name only, this should be easy”  
”I never said it would be” Clarke winked. ”Why do you think I need help - honestly we should see if we can get some information from the students. That’s our best shot I believe.  
”With the few people who like me…I could talk to them”  
”Perfect” Clarke smiled.   
”So…I honestly how are you holding up?”   
”One day at the time” She repeated what she had told her mom not long ago.   
”If you need anything let me know”   
”Actually… I heard you spoke to Lexa, I know you didn’t have any bad intentions but please don’t do it again”   
”Yeah…I felt bad after I did it, sorry about that. I won’t”  
”I know you won’t” Clarke didn’t know why but she could feel that Wells meant what he said.   
”Alright then…let’s see if we can find anything online” Wells smiled at her before he taped Gustus to the search bar and the state they where currently in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> I see your comments and I can inform that next chapter will be the first one from Lexa's pov - I guess you are looking forward to that. 
> 
> We are getting closer to answers but we are not fully there yet. 
> 
> I hope you like this chapter! Have a nice weekend...if the chapter gets a lot of hype I might post another chapter on Saturday or Sunday ;) 
> 
> Take care! :)


	11. Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We are following Lexa for a day.

Lexa yawned as she finished the last page in her history book, she was one of the few students who attended the class but she loved it. She wanted to learn about their history, what happened, what shaped them and what went wrong. How can you not be interested in that?

She had decided to read in the library and as she had walked in she spotted Clarke and Wells sitting by a computer - purposely she chose a seat so that she could see them. 

Lexa didn’t want to call herself a stalker but lately she had been seeing them together everywhere, in the hallways, the cafeteria, next to each other in the classrooms, outside - or them just talking to random people. Maybe it was Wells friends but from what she heard he wasn’t really that popular. 

She didn’t understand the problem with him being here, Wells wanted too - the school wasn’t only for orphans that some seemed to think. Misfits and people who just needed the place was welcome - why did people not welcome him?

Lexa wondered if they where dating, she shrugged at the idea of someone else touching Clarke’s body or kissing her lips. She hadn’t seen them doing anything romantically but what if they kept it low-key? 

It was hard not knowing everything that was going on in her ex life anymore, she always kept an eye on her though. Lexa had to make sure that she was fine…her ways of trying to push her away didn’t really work - Clarke was stubborn and maybe she was foolish to believe that Clarke would just back off. 

Lexa really admired that about her though, Clarke was special in so many ways - and people didn’t seem to appreciate it enough. She wanted to protect her at all costs but it felt like her mess was getting messier. 

She wish she had just said the truth from the beginning, when it comes out - because it feels like it’s bond to happen - Clarke will never want her back. She had lied for too long and betrayed the trust they shared. 

”Hey” Costia woke her from her daydreaming and Lexa realized she had been staring at the blonde for probably a few minutes.   
”Hey” Lexa looked at her.  
”What’s going on?” Costia asked.  
”Just got lost in my thoughts” Lexa excused. ”How was practice?”   
”Soccer was great, scored three goals” She smiled.  
”Yo go girl” Lexa smiled. 

She felt like she was using Costia and it wasn’t really fair - but she wanted Clarke to believe that she was actually moving on so that the blonde could too. Costia was a nice beautiful girl - she had flirted and tried so many times after their kiss that party but Lexa just didn’t have the heart to do anything with her. 

She was in love with someone else. 

To be fair, Costia was a girl she could fall in love with if Clarke wasn’t in the picture…maybe if she had to move on it could be possible. She was fun to hang with and Lexa needed some easy conversations.

Lexa usually stayed up at night doubting her ways…what if building her walls up was wrong. She wanted to believe she did it out of love…to protect Clarke. The worse it got the more she started to doubt herself.

”So what do you think?” Costia asked.  
”What?”  
”God - I feel like you never listen to me. Do you want to grab some food and then watch a movie or something?”   
”I would love to but… I’m busy…you know that school project I’m working on with Anya” Lexa had to lie to her.  
”Okay” She pouted.   
”Maybe tomorrow?” Lexa suggested.   
”Sure…” Costia left her alone again and Lexa went back to staring at Wells and Clarke. They where so into something on the computer and she was eager to find out what it was. 

It wasn’t her place anymore…and Lexa knew how much she had hurt Clarke over and over these past weeks. She hated seeing her blue eyes filled with sorrow and pain - but she had to be strong so that Clarke didn’t get involved. 

If Lexa went down, she didn’t want the blonde to go down with her. 

The right thing to do was to make sure Clarke stayed out off it and Lexa knew for sure that if the blonde did find out she wouldn’t just sit back and be quiet. Lexa hated it though, hated lying to her, hated not being close to her - hated how she had to pretend she wanted nothing to do with her.

Enough, she closed her book and put it in her bag, her sudden movement made Wells and Clarke look at her - the blonde looked pissed. Well she had every right to be…she probably thought she was fucking Costia - and for now she was gonna let her believe that. 

Lexa made her way to Mr.Griffins office and knocked gently on the door to announce her presence. 

”Hey” Anya looked at her. ”You’re late”   
”Oh shut up” Lexa rolled her eyes.  
”Come here” Anya laughed - it was weird, she actually went along very well with the girl. She didn’t think she would but Anya wasn’t that bad…she just liked to be alone and focus on what was important to her. Fine - she was a suck-up for Jake but he helped her a lot and Anya felt like she had to give back in someway.   
”Any news?” Lexa sat down next to her.  
”Bad news…”   
”Fuck…”  
”So long story short - worst case scenery we’re talking about juvenile court”  
”I can’t do that” Lexa said frustrated.   
”You have to be prepared on all the outcomes”   
”If it comes down to that - I will run Anya, disappear from the grid forever”  
”That’s why you shouldn’t be late to our meetings, we will find a way Lexa” 

They spent almost two hours together, reading and re-searching anything they could - she was glad Anya helped her. The girl didn’t get anything from it but she helped her anyway. This evening was not a good one though, they didn’t find anything that could help her.

Lexa started to feel like it was hopeless, that there was nothing she could do to stop this. It felt like her future was destroying in front of her eyes - everything she struggled for - all for nothing. All because of a stupid lie, something she could of stopped weeks ago - instead she lost the person she loved the most - Clarke - and dug her own grave. 

Maybe she wasn’t good enough for her, maybe she didn’t deserve her - maybe she had believed that pushing her away was to keep her protected - but maybe it was to be protected from herself. Lexa never wanted to hurt Clarke - never - but now she probably was the person who hurt her the most. 

Lexa felt her eyes getting teary as she was slowly making her way to her dorm, she was exhausted and her emotions was all over the place. She felt alone…she was lonely. All her sadness was also filled with hate and she wasn’t sure how to control it, it was overwhelming. 

Lexa stopped as she saw two silhouettes kissing further away in the hallway, as she focused she could tell it was Wells and Clarke - she gasped loudly but none of them noticed. Her heart broke and as if she wasn’t upset before - it was worse now. 

She had been right all along, Clarke was actually seeing someone else - someone that might be good for her. The blonde was moving on - even if Lexa wanted her too - that was a lie but it was for the best. 

She flew the scene and on her way she tapped on her phone to the person she knew would answer, she typed to meet outside of her dorm. When she finally got there Costia was already outside, waving at her with a smile. 

There was no time to think, Lexa walked up to her and grabbed her neck and kissed her - it was desperate but Costia didn’t seem to mind. She pushed her against her door, lips still exploring each other as she unlocked the door with her keys. 

”Damn” Costia breathed between their kisses.   
”No talking” Lexa needed a distraction and she wanted to feel anything but pain right now.   
”That’s sexy” Costia smirked but Lexa put a finger to her lips to hush her down, they went back to kissing each other until Lexa pushed her to the bed. 

She straddled her and as she got on top she took her shirt off, once she was done she helped Costia get undressed as well before they went back to making out, more rough this time. 

Lexa knew that it was bad but it felt so good at the same time, everything that had spin around in her mind was silent. The only thing she felt was Costias hands all over her body - or hers touching the unfamiliar body. 

The brunette felt like she was on a self-destructing train, she was damaged and damaged everything around her. She was getting teary again, fuck fuck fuck. 

”Get up” Lexa told her and Costia did what she was told.   
”Are you sure about this?” Costia was out of breath.   
”I’m gonna take off your pants now” Lexa unzipped her jeans and helped Costia get out of them, she returned the favor.   
”You’re beautiful” She whispered and Lexa didn’t know how to respond rather than kissing her again. 

Her mind was drifting off again and she could focus on the girl under her, touching her and god she needed to be touched as well. Costia took control and for the first time Lexa let her, she switched to be pushed to the sheets. 

”Let me take care of you” Costia whispered as she kissed her way down on Lexa’s stomach, she un-zipped her bra and started sucking on her nipples. Lexa moaned, it felt good to be taking care off. 

Costia carefully undressed her completely and kissed every inch of her body until Lexa couldn’t take it anymore. Finally she felt the brunettes hot breath on her center and she felt herself shudder. ”Fuck me” Lexa begged and Costia dipped two fingers into her, Lexa clenched around them as Costia began thrusting them in and out of the heat.

Damn, it felt so good - she didn’t want to think at all right now. She knew that she would feel bad in the morning but for now she had to let go, she needed to feel something. To forget for a second - so she did, she did let Costa take care of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmmm...hehe don't hate me! 
> 
> I hope you like this new chapter, there will be more from Lexa's pov. 
> 
> Please leave a comment down below... we are getting closer to answers. 
> 
> Much love!


	12. Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Wells continue to look for Gustus

Clarke smiled at Wells who was waiting for her outside her dorm room, it had become a pattern the last days.  
”Good morning” He kissed her cheek.   
”Morning” She smiled wider, it had been a risky move to kiss him - but Wells was a good guy and it was easy with them - no drama.   
”Come on love birds - tick tock” Raven walked out after her, hair in a messy bun.   
”Alright boss” Wells chuckled and Clarke lingered her fingers with his. 

They hadn’t had much luck in finding Gustus but it had made them closer, they had spent countless nights talking about everything, getting to know each other. Wells really was a good guy, every intention was good and Clarke admired that about him. She wasn’t even close to that, not that she was a disaster but she had her baggage. 

They where both off that morning and had decided to sneak around in the lounge area for some information. Google was not helping at all but talking to the students seemed to be working somehow - at least it gave them more than nothing. 

”I’ll start over there” Wells looked over at two students with faces buried in books.   
”I’ll take the other corner then” Clarke walked up to a boy who was sitting alone typing on his phone.  
”Hey” She greeted him.  
”Umm…hey?” He questioned her appearance.   
”Do you a moment?”  
”I guess”  
”I know it’s weak but I am looking for a guy named Gustus, he does not attend the school but he’s from the streets…” Clarke always felt so awkward asking about this, there really wasn’t any more information about the brother.  
”Gustus you said?”   
”Yeah”  
”The name doesn’t sound familiar” He shook his head.  
”Well if you can think of anything let me know, thank you” She smiled at him and he returned to his phone. Clarke turned around and Lexa was behind her staring at her confused, the brunette dragged her to the side.  
”Why are you looking for Gustus?” She asked.  
”Do you know him?”   
”Yeah of course, I told you about him?” She frowned.   
”You told me about…Gus” Clarke realized how blind she had been. ”That’s short for Gustus isn’t” Clarke almost got mad at herself for being so stupid.   
”Duh…did something happen to him?” Lexa was worried, Gus had been like a brother to her - she had told her so much about him. She had never made the connection, holy shit.  
”No don’t worry…Do you know where I can find him?”   
”Perhaps” Lexa shrugged. ”Probably”   
”I’m um just helping my dad, do you think you can give me an address?”   
”Are you gonna give me any more information?” Lexa was skeptical. ”Gus is not interested in the school - or at least he wasn’t”   
”I don’t get much information either…can you help me or not? You know I wouldn’t do anything to hurt him”   
”I know…” Lexa ripped a piece of paper from her note book. ”I will type down a few places I can think off…”  
”Thank you” Clarke was thankful.   
”Just um…let him know that I miss him…” Lexa gave her a sad smile.  
”I will” Clarke nodded as she looked over at Wells. ”I have to go but…thank you for this…really” It was pretty ironical that Lexa was the person to give her information about Gustus.   
”Bye” Lexa turned around.

Clarke watched as Lexa left, she wondered if the brunette knew her and Wells was sort of dating. She wasn’t sure what to call it yet, it was all so fresh and she needed to take things slow with him. He was really kind about the fact, he didn't push anything or asked for more - Clarke had been the one to make all the moves. After her last fight with Lexa - she had meant it, if the brunette didn’t want to explain what was going on it was over. She had to act on that now. 

Lexa didn’t seem to upset about it since she had been hanging out with Costia a lot more lately…speaking of the lady.  
”Clarke” Costia came up to her.   
”What’s up?” She hadn’t spoken to the girl in a while.  
”What are you doing?” Anya asked and Clarke realized that she seemed mad and guessed that this wasn’t just a friendly hello.  
”You tell me” She crossed her arms.  
”Stay away from Lexa, she talks to you for half a minute and gets upset” Costia wasn’t mad, she was jealous.   
”Oh sweetie” Clarke rolled her eyes.   
”At least I can put a smile on her face…whatever you are doing just stop it”   
”Don’t worry about it”   
”Stay away from her Clarke, she doesn’t want you anymore okay?” Costia got closer like she was threatening her.   
”Whatever makes you sleep at night” Clarke took a step back.   
”Oh..you think we sleep at night, cute” Costia chuckled and turned her heel and left the same direction Lexa had walked.   
”Fucking bitch” Clarke said under her breath. 

Who the hell did she think she was? Did she only want to imply that they where sleeping together? How insecure was Costia…and did they actually sleep together? Clarke shrugged at the idea of someone else touching Lexa’s body. 

Nope, shake it off - we’re not doing this. 

”Wells” She walked up to him with a smile, this was not going to ruin the fact that they finally had a clue to where Gustus might be. ”I got good news!” She handed him the piece of paper Lexa had given her.   
”What’s this?”  
”Possible locations to where we can find Gus”   
”Gus?”  
”Gustus…might go under the nickname Gus”   
”That’s great…umm after school today or?” Wells seem to think. ”They are pretty close to each other so it wouldn’t take to long to explore”   
”Yeah…that will work” Clarke smiled, they finally had something to go on.

The day went by pretty fast, Clarke attended her classes and avoided Lexa and Costia - she was done with the drama. She met up Wells outside of the school at the parking lot, he had planned his GPS to get them to the locations smoothly and with the best short cuts. 

The first places was a miss, mostly homeless people chilling - older people for that matter. Clarke wish there was something she and her family could do for them as well. No one deserved to live on the streets, it was really a wake up call seeing the living conditions. 

They only had two more places to go and Clarke had almost given up the hope when they parked near a bridge. There was a few tents and chairs placed under it, good to keep cover from stormy and rainy weather. 

”What do we have here?” A man in his 30’s greeted them, he looked rough.   
”Hi sir” Wells said. ”We’re looking for a guy, maybe you can help us?”   
”Hmmm…what do I get from it?”   
”We have money” Clarke told him. ”His name is Gustus”  
”Oh” He scoffed. ”Gustus…Gustus…Gustus”   
”So…?” Clarke questioned him.  
”I think I need some boost to help my memory dear”   
”I see” Clarke had already prepared some cash in her pocket, she didn’t take all off it because he would probably ask for more.   
”That helps…but”  
”This is the final offer sir” She showed him the rest off the money.  
”That really helped, he’s over there” He pointed to a man sitting in a chair smoking a cigarette.  
”Thank you” Wells said and they walked over to to him.

”Hi” Clarke announced herself. ”Are you Gustus?”   
”Who’s asking?” He looked at her, he was a big man - lots of muscles and a big beard. No one to pick a fight with.   
”My name is Clarke…ehm and this is Wells we are helping a friend”   
”I don’t care, now leave”   
”Lexa wanted you to know that she misses you” Clarke pulled the card and he looked at her finally.  
”Lexa?”   
”Yeah, she gave me the location”   
”Is she alright?” He stood up.  
”Yes…yes - we’re actually here because you’re sister is looking for you”   
”That’s impossible” He spitted.   
”Anya”  
”Don’t you dare say her name” He was getting angry. ”She died years ago”   
”She didn’t…” Wells joined the conversation. ”She lives at the Polis School, just as Lexa”   
”SHUT UP” He yelled at Wells.   
”We can bring you to her” Clarke said carefully. ”She’s been trying to find you for weeks if not months, she didn’t know you where alive either”   
”This can’t be real…” He threw his cigarette away and buried his face in his hands.  
”Come with us”   
”If this is some sort of sick joke…” Gustus warned them. ”I swear to god I will kill you with my bare hands”   
”Clarke” Wells dragged her to the side and lowered his voice. ”Is this a good idea, are you sure about this?”   
”Yes” She nodded, she needed answers.   
”Let’s go” Wells raised his voice even if he didn’t look so sure. 

The car ride was pretty awkward, Clarke was just happy to have found him - that everything hadn’t just been useless. It had to be him, he knew the name - he knew Lexa. Wells parked at his usual spot and they got out of the car. 

”What a place” Gustus looked around.   
”It’s impressive” Wells agreed.   
”I can see the little junkie got a spot” Gus scoffed and Clarke wondered who he talked about, she spotted Finn sitting outside.   
”Do you know him?” She asked.  
”I met him a few times, always on drugs… I can see that he still is, I though this place was suppose to change people?”  
”There is a no drug policy here” Clarke was firm. ”There is no way”   
”I know a junkie when I see one, he’s on drugs, sorry to break it to you”   
”Whatever, let’s go” Clarke tried to shake it but Finn being on drugs would explain a lot. 

They made their way up to her dads office, Gustus was constantly looking around - taking the place in. It was pretty breathtaking the first few times. Sort of sad that you got used to the environment. 

”Here we go” Clarke knocked on the door.  
”Come in” Anya yelled.  
”Hey” Clarke entered the room and saw Anya and Lexa sitting next to each other behind her dads desk. ”What the fuck?”   
”Clarke?” Lexa was surprised as well.   
”Your dad is not here” Anya told her.  
”Uhm…I’m here for you”   
”Anya?” Gustus entered the room and she gasped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! 
> 
> Things are happening - the next two chapters will explain a lot more! 
> 
> BUT - I hope you like this one, please leave a comment. I love to read them! :) 
> 
> Lot's of love!


	13. Door to door

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn shows something to Clarke and it brings back memories.

”I can’t believe you didn’t tell me?” Lexa chased down Clarke as they just left Gus and Anya to have a moment alone.   
”Does it matter?”  
”It’s Anya’s brother and you lied to me? Said you didn’t know what it was about?” Lexa questioned her. ”I didn’t even know she had a brother”   
”I thought lying was our thing?” Clarke fired back. ”It was her secret not mine”   
”Girls relax” Wells looked at them.   
”I little heads up would of been nice” Lexa ignored him.  
”I didn’t owe you any explanation Lexa”   
”You know what Gus mean to me” Lexa lowered her voice. ”I comforted him when he thought he LOST his little sister?!” Lexa was upset.   
”Fine” Clarke stopped walking. ”But there is nothing I can do about it now okay?”   
”Ladies, we did something good. We found her brother, can’t we all agree that’s a win?” Wells suggested.   
”Leave us” Lexa looked at Wells. ”Please” She nodded and he looked over at Clarke.  
”I meet you later okay?”   
”Okay” He wasn’t happy about it but he left the girls.   
”What are you doing?” Lexa asked her.  
”I was helping her find her brother and I succeeded.”  
”So you want me to believe that you just wanted to do something good for Anya? The person you despite the most?” She questioned her.  
”Maybe I did” Clarke shrugged.   
”You’re a bad liar”   
”We can’t all be as cold as you”  
”Yes Clarke, I am a cold hearted bitch. I got that”   
”At least Costia likes you” It was pity but Clarke could’t help it.   
”Really?” Lexa rolled her eyes. ”And Wells, he’s just a friend right?”   
”At least he’s not bragging about our sex life” Clarke fired back, not that her and Wells was having sex.   
”What?” Lexa was confused.  
”She told me to stay away from you”   
”For fucks sakes” Lexa breathed. ”I didn’t know” Lexa got closer.  
”It’s okay, I’m with Wells now” Clarke looked at her and Lexa locked eyes with her, she pulled some blonde hair behind her ear.  
”Are you happy?” She whispered.   
”Nope” Clarke took a step back. ”Stop doing that”   
”I’m sorry” Lexa took a step back as well. ”I…I just don’t want you to hate me”   
”Goodbye Lexa” Clarke didn’t need more of Lexa’s mind games. 

She had more important stuff to take care off, Clarke almost run through what felt like endless corridors until she reached Finn’s dorm room. She banged on the door, she was impatient.   
”CHILL” He opened to door.   
”Are you using again?” Clarke slammed the door behind her.  
”No, what are you talking about?”   
”Look me in my eyes and tell me you are not doing drugs?”   
”For fuck sakes Clarke, what makes you believe that” He didn't look her in the eyes.   
”You have been acting weird lately, rough appearance, red eyes and…”   
”SHUT UP” He raised his voice.   
”You know how much my father struggles to give you all a bright future, what he thinks about drugs - he will send you too a juvenile detention center”  
”I’m not doing drugs for fuck sakes”   
”You’re lying” Clarke was firm.  
”What makes you believe that?”   
”A guy I brought to school recognized you today, told me you where junkie and apparently still was”   
”So you’re just gonna believe him?”   
”What did you mean by ”get back to normal soon?” Huh…you told me that - did you mean that you would be back on your drugs eventually?”   
”SO WHAT CLARKE? Are you gonna tell on me?”   
”I can’t fucking believe this Finn” Clarke sat down on his bed.   
”I just…had a couple of rough weeks. I’ll get clean, please”   
”Did you use under our relationship?”   
”Clarke…”  
”Did you?!” She raised her voice.  
”Not in the beginning” He shook his head.   
”Oh my good…” Clarke sighed. ”Why?”   
”I’m an addict Clarke, that’s why”   
”Are you gonna tell me that the drugs made you cheat on me?”   
”I wasn’t myself”   
”Oh fuck you Finn” 

Clarke stood up, she wasn’t sure how to deal with all of this. It all sort of made sense now, how he has been acting, his weird change of moods - anger. What was she suppose to do? She had so much hate for him but sending him off would just lower his chances in life even more. 

Was he worth another chance though? 

”Please Clarke, say something?”   
”I don’t know what to say Finn”  
”Did Lexa tell you this?”   
”Why do you always have to bring her into this?” Clarke got even more annoyed.   
”Because she’s acting like she’s some sort of a saint”   
”Oh…I caught you doing drugs and your gonna manipulate me to be mad at her now?”  
”I’m not saying what I did is good”   
”But you’re trying to imply something?”   
”Never mind” Finn shrugged.  
”I can’t just forget about this Finn, how can you be so calm about this?”   
”Does it seems like anyone noticed?” Finn questioned her. ”I cover my traces pretty good”   
”Apparently”   
”People are to full off themselves to see other peoples damage”   
”Stop blaming your shit on other people” Clarke was getting pissed.  
”I am not the only bad guy here Clarke”   
”We’re talking about you now?”   
”Don’t you think it’s weird that Lexa just left you?” Finn got closer. ”Huh?”   
”That’s none of your business”   
”The holy Lexa Woods, leaves you with no explanation - just like that, over - and you don’t think that there is something more to the story?”   
”Do you know anything just spit it out”   
”Maybe I do”   
”WHAT?!” Clarke yelled at him.  
”Look at this” Finn tapped on his phone a few times before handing it to her. 

Clarke slide through the photos and gasped - she couldn't believe it.

”No, this is not true” Clarke threw his phone on the ground.   
”You see…me and Lexa aren’t that different”   
”You are very different”   
”It’s hard to know the truth, isn’t it?” Finn shook his head.   
”I am not done with you!” Clarke stormed out of the room, she had to go yell at someone else.

*Nine months earlier*

”Are you gonna sleep all day” Clarke chuckled as she played with Lexa’s hair, the brunette had been sleeping until noon and seemed tired.  
”Mmm…no” Lexa buried her face in her neck.   
”Are you getting sick?” Clarke checked her temperature on her forehead but it seemed fine.   
”Just cuddle me” Lexa threw her arms around Clarke and held her tight. ”I love you”   
”I love you too silly” Clarke smiled. ”Stop acting so weird”   
”What are you watching?” Lexa mumbled.   
”Friends, like we usually do on Sundays”   
”Oh…babe” Lexa lifted her head to steal a quick kiss from Clarke. ”Just…I didn’t sleep that well”   
”We went to sleep at the same time, I think you even fell asleep before me” Clarke paused the episode to focus on the girl in her arms.   
”I woke up and then I had trouble falling asleep again” Lexa pouted.   
”Okay I’m sorry babe, you want me to bring you anything?”   
”No, just stay here. I want to hold you” Lexa held her even tighter.   
”Okay weirdo” Clarke smiled as she kept playing with Lexa’s hair, it didn’t take long until she slumbered again. 

*Today*

Her head was spinning, it couldn’t be true - nope. She didn’t know what to do but she was just not angry anymore she was furious. Her mind kept flashing back to that memory, that morning when Lexa had been acting so weird. Showing extra love, being extra cuddling - and how tired she had been. 

No - fuck fuck fuck. 

Clarke rushed through the hallways as everything started to fall to place, he couldn't lie with those pictures. Once again she was slamming on an ex’s door, Lexa opened it pretty quickly.

”ARE YOU FOR REAL?” Clarke pushed her as soon as she saw her and closed the door behind her.  
”What the fuck are you doing?” Lexa looked at her confused.  
”AFTER EVERYTHING? HOW COULD YOU?” Clarke pushed her again, Lexa didn’t fight back.  
”What is this all about?” Lexa took a step back so that Clarke couldn’t reach her.   
”I can’t believe this Lexa, you know what I had been through…”   
”Clarke..”   
”And I had to find out through Finn? Are you fucking kidding me?”   
”You talked to Finn?”   
”You didn’t have balls enough to tell me, so you just pushed me away?”   
”Please…let me explain?”   
”So it’s true right?”   
”I don’t know what he told you please calm down”  
”DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN LEXA” Clarke yelled.  
”Just let me explain, please” Lexa stayed calm.  
”I don’t want to hear it now, I don’t want to hear it ever.”   
”So why are you here?” Lexa asked her.   
”I need to know if it’s true, I want you to look me in my eyes and say it”   
”Say what?”   
”Don’t play stupid”   
”I don’t know what he told you Clarke”  
”Stop lying to me, just FUCKING STOP” Clarke was losing it, she was at a breaking point.   
”I can explain everything but I need you to listen to me”   
”What is it to explain huh?”   
”Please sit down”   
”Lexa…why did you do it?” Clarke broke, tears was streaming down her cheeks. ”I saw the pictures”   
”What pictures…?”   
”WHY DID YOU CHEAT ON ME?” Clarke raised her voice again and wiped away her tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola! 
> 
> A new chapter my friends, please let me know what you think! 
> 
> Have a nice weekend! :)


	14. More arguments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke finally gets some more clarity

Lexa looked at her with concern eyes, she started pacing around in the room before she finally looked at Clarke again.  
”I never cheated on you Clarke” Lexa was firm, she looked straight in her eyes. ”Never”  
”How do you explain the pictures then? It sure looked like it!” Clarke was confused.  
”I didn’t want you to find out out like this but I will explain…please let me try to explain” Lexa sat down on her bed. ”Please”  
”I’m standing but I’m listening”  
”So…” Lexa struggled.  
”Come on” But Clarke was impatience.  
”Promise me you listen until the end” Lexa looked at her.  
”Fine”  
”Remember that party where Raven fell and hurt her knee?”  
”Of course, she complained about it for weeks” Clarke knew that weekend, the same weekend Lexa had been acting weird.  
”We got back to my place pretty early due to that, we fell asleep”  
”Yes” Clarke nodded she didn’t like the story so far.  
”I woke up around three that night, my phone kept buzzing it was um… Nathalie from the pictures you just saw.”  
”The girl you used to sleep with?” Clarke raised her eyebrows.  
”We dated shortly before you and I, yeah…” Lexa breathed. ”I tried to ignore it but she kept hitting my phone up so I decided to read her messages - she kept texting me that she needed help, that she was drunk and…it was a bit hard to read her sentences”  
”And?” Clarke crossed her arms.  
”I sneaked out” Lexa looked away. ”I called her outside of my dorm trying to figure out what was going on and she could barely talk, she finally told me she was in the girls bathroom close to entrance”  
”Why didn’t you wake me?”  
”I don’t know…I acted in the moment, just felt like I needed to help her - she seemed scared”  
”Keep going”  
”I found her…her shirt was missing and she was crying on the floor” Lexa shrugged by the memory. ”She could barely stand… some guy had tried to…take advantage of her situation”  
”Why would this be a secret to me?”  
”The door wasn’t completely closed…and by the looks of it…those photos, it surely looks like we are hooking up”  
”Yes” Clarke agreed.  
”I was just helping her get dressed but it looks the opposite” Lexa sighed. ”Finn took the photos and followed us, once I got Nathalie to bed he stopped me”  
”…and?” Clarke didn't understand why Lexa had to lie about this.  
”He threatened me with the pictures, saying he was gonna show them to you - tell you I cheated on you and that he had proof…and stupid of me but I got scared”  
”Scared of what?”  
”Losing you…” Lexa wiped a tear away from her cheek. ”I told him nothing happened but he kept manipulating me, that you would hate me for doing the same thing that he did…” Lexa sighed. ”I should've never let him get to me”  
”Fuck Lexa…you should've told me?” Clarke didn’t understand, if Lexa was just helping Nathalie, why did she lie about it?  
”I know, I regret it to this day - I was about to tell you of course but… He made me believe that I would loose you and…you’re all I had Clarke. He knew that, he fucking knew that. So I did what I was told.”  
”What did he threatened you with?” Clarke realized Lexa was not finished with the story.  
”He wanted pills…” Lexa breathed.  
”That’s why you visited my mom?” Clarke started to solve the puzzle.  
”I know it’s bad Clarke…I thought it would be a one time thing…but it only got worse”  
”What you’ve done is illegal?”  
”Don’t you think I know that? That’s why he made me keep doing it, even after we broke up. He said if I didn’t get him the pills, he would tell your father…it never stopped. He always had something new to threaten if I didn’t get him the pills.”  
”I can’t believe this…” Clarke was speechless. ”You didn’t take the pills, what would he tell my father?”  
”That makes it worse, that makes me a dealer…I didn’t have to go and ask for them but I did…” Lexa shook her head. ”I couldn’t face lying to you anymore, or get you into my mess…at your parents school, I couldn’t do that to you”  
”Buy you did…instead of telling me the truth” Clarke didn’t know what to say, this was all to much.  
”i’m in deep shit okay and Anya is trying to help me, see if there is anything we can do. We want Finn to go down for this.”  
”I can’t believe he did this to you…” Clarke sighed. ”And…I can’t believe you lied to my mother”  
”I never thought this would happen…” Lexa looked away. ”And I can’t just tell your dad what’s going on… I used Abby for the pills…”  
”Are you still…giving him pills?”  
”No, I stopped and now he is getting anxious, detoxing…that’s why he looks so rough”  
”I just don’t understand…don’t you trust me?” Clarke shrugged. ”If you just had told me the truth…I would've”  
”If Finn showed you those pictures” Lexa interrupted her. ”Telling you he saw us making out… would you believe nothing happened, after what he did to you?”  
”I would question it of course but I trusted you more. He was the lying asshole, you where…you where suppose to be different…turns out Finn was right anyways, you are alike”  
”Don’t say that” Lexa got up. ”No no no” She grabbed Clarke’s arm.  
”Don’t touch me” Clarke stepped back.  
”I…I’m sorry Clarke”  
”It doesn’t change anything does it?”  
”Please…” Lexa seemed desperate.  
”Thank you for finally given me some closure, I can finally move on now” Clarke was relived that she had answers but she wasn’t sure it made her feel any better.  
”We should talk about this”  
”NO” Clarke raised her voice. ”I have wanted to talk about this for weeks, you hear me? Weeks. I don’t want to hear it now okay, I gave you so many chances to come clean but you decided to keep lying”  
”I didn’t want you to get involved”  
”Yet here we are” Clarke was over it. ”I can see myself out”  
”CLARKE” Lexa yelled behind her but she ignored it.

Clarke wasn’t sure how to deal with all of this new information, the fact that Finn made Lexa his little bitch and she kept lying about it…Gus, who was a friend off Lexa’s, turned out to be Anya’s brother and…it was all just a complicated mess.

She was glad that Lexa hadn’t cheated on her at least…not because it made anything better but if that had been the reason…she didn’t know how she would’ve dealt with it. How the brunette had decided to lie to her instead and got herself into this mess…made her speechless. Fine - Clarke had always told her that cheaters was the worst thing she knew and that if Lexa ever did it to her…Nope that didn’t matter, she was not gonna make up excuses for what she did.

Lexa was never scared, why was she so scared of Finn? And why did he try to lie to her, did he really not think that she would go and talk to Lexa?

”Asshole” Clarke opened Finns door and entered without knocking this time.  
”Fuck you scared me”  
”Why do you want to destroy my life?” Clarke bursted out.  
”I only want the best for you”  
”Lying about Lexa cheating? Threatening her?”  
”She wasn’t good enough for you”  
”And what makes you think that you can decide that?”  
”Because I know you, I know that she was a rebound from what we had”  
”Oh and you think I’m gonna take off my clothes now? Wow you are my hero”  
”Clarke…All I have done, I have done it for you”  
”Oh so your drug addiction is because of me?” Clarke scoffed.  
”She was to afraid to tell you the truth, at least I owned up to it”  
”She never cheated on me and you got caught”  
”Come on Clarke, we are good together”  
”FINN” Clarke raised her voice. ”Stay away from me, you hear me? I hate both of you and you and me will NEVER I repeat NEVER happen again. You are the biggest mistake in my life”  
”Oh…You don’t mean that” Finn shook his head, his leg bouncing up and down from the chair he was sitting in. ”Take it back”  
”You and me, will never happen again” Clarke repeated herself.  
”TAKE IT BACK” Finn raised his voice and slammed his fist on the desk.  
”You should really get some help” Clarke spitted before he left him alone with his anger.

Clarke didn’t leave her room the next couple of days, Raven kept bringing her food - she tried to eat it but she didn’t have any appetite. Wells, stayed the nights with her - it was nice to sleep in his arms. He didn’t ask any questions yet but she knew that she had to talk to him, she just had no idea how to explain everything.

She didn’t want him to get involved, he was innocent to this mess. Lexa had been getting pills from her mother, that was sent further to another student. Abby could get in trouble for this as well…fuck. If she stayed in her dorm forever would it go away automatically then?

It had almost been a week and it was a Sunday, she knew she had to go back to class tomorrow - not only because her parents where bugging her but she had to try to go back to her life. Neither Lexa nor Finn had tried to reach out to her, maybe they wouldn’t bother her. So the next day she woke up pretty early, Wells seemed surprised as she actually got out of the bed that morning.

”Class?” He asked.  
”Art class” She gave him a half smile. ”Time to get back to it”  
”That’s good news…I need to head back to my dorm for some new clothes but I see you later?” He asked.  
”Yeah” They shared a quick kiss before he left the dorm room.  
”How are you?” Raven knew everything, she couldn’t lie to her best friend.  
”Fine” Clarke told her.  
”You text me today if you need anything”  
”I’ll be fine” Clarke tried to assure her. ”I don’t care about lying…idiots or cheaters or whatever”  
”Just curious, have you confirmed that Lexa’s story is real?” Raven wondered.  
”What do you mean?”  
”She has been lying to you, are you sure this is the truth?”  
”Why would she lie about something like this, she’s in trouble for it”  
”Just asking…”  
”Anya still owes me one for finding her brother, I could talk to her”  
”If you want to”  
”I don’t know”  
”Or stay out of it” Raven suggested.  
”I’m trying”  
”I mean Lexa is right about one thing…this can be messy and she could face jail and If you know too much…”  
”Prison?” Clarke shrugged.  
”She has been dealing pills to a student…it’s not legal Clarke wake up. I would’ve be scared to if I was her…he threatened to turn her in. All she has is the school like the rest of us, no one wants to give that up”  
”Why are you defending her?”  
”I’m trying to understand her, I mean do you think she deserves to go down for this?”  
”I guess not…”  
”I guess I’m just telling you to try to prepare for the worst…that she might have to leave the school”  
”I don't care about her, Raven. Please, stop whatever you are trying to do here.”  
”But you do Clarke, you do care about her and I know that you don’t want to hear this - but you know I am always straight up with you. Lexa is in deep shit, the secret is out and there is no reason for Finn to not…hand her in.”  
”He wouldn’t do that…” Clarke wasn’t sure. ”He can’t…”  
”He is pissed, he has done shitty things to both you and Lexa”  
”Yes but…”  
”Clarke…what would stop him now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello peeps!
> 
> New chapter, let me know what you think! 
> 
> Are you guys watching season 7 of the 100? It's really good and I think Lexa might come back, fingers crossed! Do you believe she will? 
> 
> A new youtube video with the 100.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ORqqQqakQs&lc=Ugy4_gCyHFcyA44rIIN4AaABAg
> 
> This is my first fic I haven't made a trailer for lol, might change my mind and edit lol.
> 
> Take care! :)


	15. More lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke lies to get Wells help and Lexa is reflecting over her past.

”You didn’t have to walk me to class” Clarke smiled at Wells, she knew he would - he always did when he could.  
”I like it” He smiled back.  
”So now that you are here with me…my mom asked if I could get Lexa’s file in her office” She took a new breath. ”But I need to talk to her real quick could you get it for me?”   
”Her file?” He was skeptic.  
”Yeah, she needed it for something I don’t know” She actually needed to distract her mother so he could get it in the meantime.   
”That doesn’t seem right” He shrugged.  
”Lexa approved and so did my mom” Clarke lied.   
”But…”  
”There she is” Clarke spotted her mom. ”Please” She pouted.  
”Clarke?”  
”Mom hi” She stopped her mother from walking into the office.   
”Hi love” Abby smiled as Clarke signalized for Wells to get what she asked for.   
”How’s your day?” She only needed to occupy her for a little bit.  
”Actually a bit busy, do you mind if we talk later?” Her mom was about to turn around.  
”Wait” Clarke had to act quickly and threw her arms around her mother.  
”What’s this for?” She hugged her back though.  
”Just a thank you, you have been so helpful these last weeks” Clarke wasn't lying but she sure didn’t plan this moment.  
”Always darling” Her mother smiled into the hug and softened and that’s when Wells walked out of Dr.Griffins office.  
”Won’t hold you any longer if you don’t have time, talk to you later?” Clarke let go of her mother.  
”Yes” Her mother smiled and Clarke rushed up to Wells. ”Hi Wells” Her mother waved at him.   
”This doesn’t seem right” Wells rolled his eyes and repeated himself when Clarke got closer.   
”Don’t worry about it, did you get it it?”   
”Yeah…” Wells handed over the folder and Clarke put it in her bag quickly.  
”Thank you” She smiled at him. Clarke didn’t have many classes that day and she was eager to finish the day so that she could swing by her dad’s office to see Anya. 

Her last class finally was over a few hours later and she rushed the familiar path to her fathers office. She had stopped caring about the fact that Anya spent so much time there - he however preferred the desk he had at home. The apartment her parents lived in was huge and he had plenty of space for an office there as well. 

”Anya” The door was opened and she walked in.   
”Hey” She greeted her.   
”How’s your brother?” Clarke asked.  
”Ask Lexa”   
”What do you mean?”   
”He seems to want to spend more time with her than me”   
”Wow, look how the tables has turned” Clarke rolled her eyes.  
”I might slightly understand your better now”   
”They did live together for a while” Clarke told her.   
”So did we” Anya sighed. ”So what do you want?” She changed the subject.   
”Well…I did my part didn’t I?”   
”Yeah..” Anya stopped whatever she was doing on the computer. ”So what do you want to know?”   
”I want to know why you are helping Lexa?”   
”Finn is trying to expose Lexa, she was forced to get him some pills…” Anya waited for a reaction.  
”I did catch up a little bit” Clarke shrugged.   
”Because off some pictures he took of her and…I don’t know something about you hating her - long story short, we are trying to clear her name”   
”Why are you helping her?” Clarke asked again.  
”I don’t have much friends here…I was bored I guess”   
”So it’s true…” Clarke sat down and sighed.   
”Who would lie about this?” Anya looked at her confused.   
”Maybe I was just hoping it was a lie…it’s so absurd and stupid” Clarke shook her head. ”So fucking stupid, who would put themselves in a position like this?”   
”Love can drive you crazy” Anya suggested. ”Or so they say”   
”This is not an act of love, she lied and…” Clarke struggled to find words to explain her thoughts.   
”You can say whatever you want about it but Lexa loves you” Anya seemed to not be bothered about what Lexa had done to her.   
”I don’t want talk about it”  
”You brought it up?”   
”Whatever, I want to help. What can I do?”   
”What are you talking about?” Anya was even more confused.   
”I want to help” Clarke was firm.   
”No you don’t” Lexa walked into the room with Gustus behind her, once again showing up out of no where.   
”Why not?” Clarke stood up and faced her ex.   
”I don’t want you to get dragged into this”   
”I already am” Clarke locked eyes with her.  
”A word, outside please?” Lexa asked and Clarke followed her and closed the door behind her.   
”So…?”   
”Clarke…Can we please talk about everything?” Lexa was nervous. ”I…I feel like we need to and I don’t want to pressure you but…”  
”I just can’t believe you lied to me…that you would rather fall for Finn’s bullshit than just be real with me” Clarke crossed her arms.   
”I never wanted this to happen…he…honestly he scares me” Lexa shook her head. ”And after all the hurt you’ve been through with him, how he cheated on you… and I just didn’t want you to believe I did the same thing to you. It escalated and I just want to protect you from it now”   
”It’s too late to for that Lexa, I am already in this mess- I know about it. I can’t just pretend that I don’t know anything”   
”Do you think you can ever forgive me?” Lexa asked instead of replying to what Clarke just said.   
”Let’s be clear Lexa, I am doing this because Finn is an asshole and I don’t think you deserve what he is trying to do here…but you and me? It’s not about that, I’m with Wells now…I moved on and from what I can see you moved on as well with Costia”   
”I never wanted to hurt you” Lexa said quietly.  
”Why do I feel like people keep saying that to me” Clarke scoffed, she didn’t want to stick around anymore and decided to walk away from the conversation. 

***

Lexa shut her door behind her and finally let her tears fall, she made sure to lock it before laying down on her bed. She was absolutely broken and devastated. Clarke hated her, despited her for what she did. Lexa didn’t blame her, she had been a total dick. 

She didn’t understand why Clarke wanted to help her, she couldn’t talk her out of it either. All this lying for Clarke to end up in her mess anyway. Lexa wiped a few tears away and thought about what Gustus said earlier.

He thought she should run away, that going down for this was not worth it - that he would look after her. If she decided to leave the police school, then at least Clarke would be safe. She could do right by just leaving, stop Clarke from hurting. 

Leaving however, meant that she had to leave everything behind - at least she would have Gustus. He had really been like a big brother to her, when he found out about the school he forced her to go. She didn't want to at first - but he saw greatness in Lexa. He believed she could do great things in this world. 

She had failed him as well. 

Lexa had heard stories about Finn on the streets, things she never told Clarke about - at least not everything. She didn’t know if they where true or not - for all she knew he was a drug addict with anger issues but the word had been going around that he ”accidentally” murdered someone. Some sort of bar fight that escalated, she never got it confirmed but it was always in the back of her mind. 

When she first saw Finn when she got to the school, he seemed fine. She was glad for him, finding a new path. A sober path… sadly she noticed pretty quickly when things changed - she wanted to believe she was so interested because she knew who he was and not because of his girlfriend at the time.

Lexa admired Clarke a long time before they got together, she saw the sadness when her and Finn was arguing. When he was acting up, Lexa studied his eyes - the prince charming was breaking inside of him. The drugs where taking over again. 

She made her first move in a hallway, Clarke and Finn had been fighting before he stormed off. Lexa comforted the blonde, she didn’t flirt or anything - she just wanted to make sure she was alright. She never tried anything with the blonde but they builded a bond with each other, Clarke came to her when she needed to talk.

Finn hated it back then already - how his girlfriend was seeking comfort in Lexa. That’s probably when it all started. When they broke up, after Clarke found out he cheated on her - the blonde was a mess. Lexa was there for her - she never intended to steal Clarke from Finn - he ruined it himself.

Like Lexa ruined it herself as well. 

She used to think he was so stupid to lose a girl like Clarke - and here she was crying because she lost her. 

Finn got worse after their break-up, with time Lexa noticed his behavior change even more…their conversations getting more aggressive. He threatened her multiple times, to back off, break up with Clarke, leave the school…it was exhausting honestly.

He got obsessed with her, she tried to catch a break but he mentally abused her for months. When he took the pictures she was already scared enough off him, she didn’t know what he was capable off. 

So she agreed, she fucking agreed to get that pill. She thought it would ease whatever threat he was…she made a mistake. It all got worse from that point and now he knew she was weak - that he could push her. She had never thought of herself as weak before…she didn’t take bullshit and stood up for herself but when she had something to lose…She didn’t want to lose Clarke and therefor she fell for it. 

She did try to say no once, shortly after she ended it with Clarke. He got furious and the next time he showed up, he had smirked while lifting his shirt where a knife was placed in his pants. Lexa didn’t know what to do, so she continued…until she asked Anya for help. Anya gave her courage to say no again. Lexa had refused at first, explaining the situation but Anya pushed her. 

This is when it got messier and scarier. Instead of yelling like he usually did he went quiet. He didn’t talk to her for while, it wasn’t until the day Gustus showed up to see his sister with Clarke and Wells. He had stopped her and said that she was gonna go down for this, that it was over for her.

If this comes out.. it wouldn’t matter that she was forced to. Lexa could’ve come clean as soon as she sat her foot in Dr.Griffins office and Finn would’ve been thrown out of the school. Lexa went back and took the pills and gave them to him multiple times. 

She was scared, she still was. She didn’t know what was next and she was pretty sure it was gonna get ugly. Even if Finn didn’t turn her in because that would make him lose everything as well…he could still hurt her in other ways. 

Finn Collins scared her and she hated it.

Almost as much as she hated herself after she slept with Costia, she kept doing the wrong things. Hurting people around her that didn’t deserve it, she had talked to Costia though - explained that she needed to take things slow, that last night had been a mistake. The girl hadn’t liked it, that’s probably why she had ran to Clarke and told her about their night. Costia had been jealous - and angry that Lexa wasn’t ready. 

Costia was still sticking around and Lexa still didn’t mind the company - but it wasn’t what she craved or wanted. Nobody wants to be alone but you can’t pretend to fill a void you don’t want to fill. 

Maybe Gustus was right, maybe leaving was the best decision. 

For everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! 
> 
> Another day another chapter. Let me know what you think in the comments! 
> 
> Hope you have a nice week so far, take care! :) 
> 
> Bonus:  
> Badass Lexa: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVQPGKZYfo8


	16. It's not you, it's me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dance is coming up and Lexa wants to change

”ATTENTION STUDENTS” Jake’s voice echoed in the speakers and Clarke stiffed, it was rare of her father to announce a public speech. ”IT HAS COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT A STUDENT OR STUDENTS HAS BEEN BREAKING INTO DR.GRIFFINS OFFICE. PLEASE REST ASSURE THAT WE WILL FIND OUT WHO IT WAS AND THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES FOR YOUR ACTIONS” Her father took a break. ”I WANTED TO CANCEL MISS FLAME BUT DR.GRIFFIN DIDN’T WANT TO PUNISH ALL OF YOU - YOU CAN NOW APPLY FOR MISS FLAME DOWN IN THE CAFETERIA. THANK YOU FOR LISTENING!” 

Holy fuck…Clarke knew exactly what this was about, she was…or she made Wells steal Lexa’s file from her mothers office. She thought she would’ve been able to put it back before anyone noticed. Clarke had almost forgotten about the file, it had been so much lately.

”Clarke?” Wells looked at her and she did her best to look him in the eyes.   
”It’s not about the file, don’t worry” Clarke lied to him.  
”Damn, that scared me for a second” He chuckled and she felt bad, he was good to her and she did him dirty like this. Clarke just never thought it would be a problem. ”So what’s Miss Flame?” He asked.  
”Jaha never told you about the tradition?” She was glad he changed the subject.   
”I don’t think so?” He seemed to think about it.  
”Girls can sign up with a partner and compete to win the years title of Miss Flame. It’s suppose to be empowering or whatever but it’s really just people judging your looks, dance moves and appearance” Clarke didn’t like the tradition.  
”We should do it!” He smiled at her and Clarke got surprised, didn’t he just hear what she said?  
”It’s not really…Why?” She questioned.  
”Come on, let’s do something different. Lately we just been talking to strangers or staring at a computer screen, let me treat you like a goddess for an evening” His smile was goofy and it was hard to say no to a face like that.   
”Do you really want to do this?”   
”It can be fun…come on” He smiled wider. ”For me…please?”   
”Fine” Clarke rolled her eyes. ”Fine” She couldn’t believe she agreed to this but she almost felt guilty for making him take the file…how could she say no?   
”Yes” He cheered.

Clarke finished her school day and went straight back to her dorm once her last class was finished because she couldn’t wait to tell Raven about what she had agreed to.  
”Raven” She almost slammed the door open and the Latina looked at her confused.  
”Woa! You scared the crap out of me. Whats up?  
”You won’t believe what I agreed to…” Clarke threw herself at her bed.  
”Tell me” Raven looked excited.  
”I promised Wells we would sign up for Miss Flame” Clarke wined and Raven bursted out laughing.  
”No fucking way?!” She kept laughing. ”Your mom’s gonna love it”   
”She had wanted me to sign up every year and I have always refused” Clarke laughed back. ”Holy shit”  
”Was it Wells idea?” She wondered.  
”Duuuuuh?” Clarke sighed. ”Please…sign up with me”   
”NO WAY” Raven laughed even more.   
”Come on?! Are you gonna let me go through this alone? I need you” Clarke pouted.   
”I love you but we usually stand in the audience and make fun of the pairs…I intend to do the same this year”  
”Oh…I just remember…That time we where about to share a tent but someone begged to be with her boyfriend instead and the words I’ll owe you one slipped out of your mouth” Clarke smirked.   
”Anything but this” Raven looked defeated.   
”Come one…we can still make a joke out of it” Clarke suggested. ”Please”  
”Okay. FINE” Raven wasn’t happy about it.  
”I love you” Clarke smiled.  
”You better” 

***

Lexa had been reflected a lot lately, how her actions not only hurt other people but also herself. She didn’t recognize herself anymore and she didn’t like it, she wanted to change. Be better. So she took a deep breath before approaching Costia who was sitting outside in the school yard doing homework. 

”Hi” She sat down next to her.  
”Hey you” Costia smiled.  
”Do you have a minute?”   
”Yeah sure” Costia closed her laptop and put it next to her. ”Whats up?”   
”I thought we should have an um…talk about us I guess” Lexa was nervous.   
”Okay, what about us?” Costa’s smile disappeared.   
”I just…you are a really fantastic girl. You’re smart, funny and kind…”  
”I can hear a but already” Costia interrupted her.   
”I am not ready for anything new, I never was” Lexa breathed. ”It’s not fair to you”   
”Somehow I am not surprised” Costia sighed and she looked pretty sad, but it was better to tell her the truth.   
”I wanted to be ready…and I am sorry for that night. I made the move I know that…I knew that you liked me and I wanted to feel the same for you”  
”But you didn’t…”   
”You can’t force feelings….” Lexa took a deep breath. ”I am sorry”   
”I knew the second you rejected my kiss the first time we talked…I took a liking in you and I decided to ignore all the signals you gave me…”  
”It’s not your fault” Lexa shrugged.  
”Damn right is not my fault” Suddenly Costia’s mood changed and Lexa looked at her confused.   
”I just wanted to be honest with you”   
”If you want to spend your time longing for Clarke, that’s your problem - instead of seeing what you have in front of you. Someone that actually wants you”   
”Hey…” Lexa tried to calm her down, she figured it wasn’t fun to be rejected but come on.   
”You can’t be serious, you chose her over me?”   
”What do you want me to do? Keep ignoring the fact that I have feelings for someone else? Is that someone you want to be with? Costia, we don’t have to become enemies because of this - I thought we could have a conversation. It’s not about you, it’s me…”   
”Really it’s not you it’s me? Are you gonna use that card? I have done nothing wrong Lexa, why am I not enough?” Costia stood up.   
”It’s not about you like I said” Lexa shook her head, she didn’t like the phrase either but it was unfortunately true. ”I can’t control how I feel and you deserve better than that, don’t you agree?”   
”Whatever” She grabbed her stuff and left Lexa sitting there like a question mark. 

What the hell just happened? Costia had been understanding at first but suddenly she switched. Lexa was glad she had the conversation even if the outcome wasn’t what she expected. She thought they could’ve kept it friendly since they hadn’t really been more than a fling. 

If Lexa was in her position she would rather hear the truth than being lied to, thinking someone else had feelings for her when they didn’t. Apparently people where different. She didn’t like the fact that Costia had been talking to Clarke about them either, seemed pity. 

Her mind wondered to Clarke, the blonde still didn’t want to talk to her - Lexa felt like she needed to explain more but it wasn’t strange that she wasn’t interested now. Lexa dragged it out to long thinking she could solve it by herself. 

She really just missed her, she missed Clarke every second off the day. It didn’t matter how much she tried to distract herself, the blonde was always on her mind. She wish there was something she could say or do to get her back. 

Lexa zipped her leather jacket, it was getting chilly outside. At least she had made the right decision talking to Costia and sadly she had seen her true colors today. At the end of the day It didn’t matter that she felt lonely, no one could fill that void expect for one person.

And she wasn’t hers anymore. 

***

Clarke noticed how Lexa was sitting outside the school on the bench, she seemed to be staring at nothing. Raven was right, she did care about her and she was worried about the brunette. 

”Aren’t you cold?” She approached her and Lexa turned to look at her.   
”Hey, I’m alright for now”   
”On this very bench I asked you to be my girlfriend” Clarke remembered it so well and pointed at it.  
”You did” Lexa seemed surprised by the topic but couldn’t help but smile.   
”I was so nervous but my gut told me to do it, that what we had was special” Clarke wasn’t sure where she was going with this, it felt right to talk about it.  
”Why are you telling me this?” Lexa wondered.   
”Us? Where we special?” Clarke asked.  
”Yes” Lexa didn’t hesitate.   
”So how did we get so screwed up?”   
”I don’t know Clarke. I don’t think neither of us planned for this”   
”I told you everything, always. We never lied to each other”   
”The truth is out there now”   
”I guess”   
”Can I ask you something?” Lexa lowered her voice and Clarke nodded in response. ”If you had been in my situation, what would you have done?”   
”I want to believe that I would have been straight up with you. I also know that sometimes you think you make the right choices, that your intentions are good…but the outcome is not.”   
”Yeah” Lexa sighed.  
”I wish I could just tell my father and send Finn away”   
”I wish it was that easy…” Lexa agreed. ”Did you hear about the break-in? Do you think Finn has anything to do with it?”   
”I don’t think so” Clarke knew it wasn’t him.   
”Because if he stole any pills…we should at least hint about it to your parents.”   
”Maybe…” Clarke wasn’t sure how to respond, it would be a good idea but there are no pills missing, just a file with Lexa’s name on it.  
”So are you gonna tell my why you wanted to find Gus?” Lexa was still curious about it.   
”Oh shit” Clarke looked at the time on her phone. ”I actually have to go” She stood up.  
”That’s one way to avoid the question. Where?”   
”I might have signed up for Miss Flame and I need to fucking go to a dance class” Clarke complained.  
”No way?” Lexa smirked. ”You hate Miss Flame?”   
”Yes” Clarke chuckled.   
”I tried to get you to that last year” Lexa shook her head. ”What changed?”   
”I still hate it…Wells wanted to go and…” Clarke realized that she had agreed to go with him but not Lexa, but this was different.   
”Don’t sweat it” Lexa was calm. ”I thought you would regret it if you never signed up, since it’s so important to your mother. She must love it”  
”Oh…” Clarke never knew that was the reason why Lexa asked her. ”She had happy tears when I told her”   
”See” Lexa smiled. ”You should go”   
”Hey…” Clarke looked at her. ”Maybe talking to my parents would help, we all have your back in this you know. It’s better if they get our story first” She suggested.   
”I don’ t know Clarke…” Lexa sighed. ”What if they don’t help?”   
”Think about it at least” Clarke put her hand on Lexa’s shoulder. ”You’re not alone in this, not anymore”   
”I will” Lexa put her hand on top of Clarke’s. ”Thank you…honestly” Lexa suddenly chuckled.  
”What?” Clarke didn’t understand what was funny.  
”I wish I could see you practice for Miss Flame” Lexa laughed.  
”Oh shut up” Clarke couldn’t help but smile, they had made so much fun of the event in the past.   
”For the first time I am excited for Miss Flame” Lexa teased.   
”I am regretting this more and more…” Clarke wined. ”I am gonna go now”  
”Or dance away” Lexa yelled behind her and the blonde made a spin, both bursted out laughing again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeeeello again!
> 
> I hope you like this chapter! 
> 
> Please leave a comment and let me know what you think so far! 
> 
> Have a wonderful week <3


	17. Miss Flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Miss Flame tonight.

”Are you ready for today?” Raven asked shortly after they both woke up at the alarm set.   
”Can we maybe pretend that we are sick?” Clarke suggested, Miss Flame was tonight.   
”Food poisoning?”  
”Could work” She smiled at her friend.   
”Maybe it will be fun, rest your little brain for an evening”   
”Yeah and at least Wells are excited”   
”Raf is as well, I don’t get it” Raven chuckled. ”Shouldn’t it be the other way around?”   
”I guess not…and I can’t believe we have to wake up this early for make-up”   
”How can you spend a whole day getting ready?”  
”At least it will be a lot of food breaks”   
”Cheers to that” Raven got out of the bed.   
”I wonder if Lexa thought about what I said, about talking to my parents” Clarke couldn’t let go off it.   
”You can’t stress about that Clarke” Raven threw a pillow on her. ”Get up, we need to leave in like ten minutes”  
”I know I can’t help it”  
”Does this mean you’re not angry with her anymore?”   
”I am tired of being angry, I’m not okay with this but in the end you where right. I do care”   
”I’m always right sweetie” Raven winked.   
”And that was the last time I mention anything about it for the day”   
”That’s my girl” Raven smiled, they had both changed into lazy clothing while talking. ”Ready to go?”   
”Yeah” 

The day was stressful, they started it easy with breakfast for everyone attending. It was nice to talk about nothing with Raf, Raven and Wells. It seemed normal for once, no arguments, no weird conversations - just teenagers talking about normal stuff. Clarke started to realize why people wanted to be a part of this, her mother really went the extra mile with the catering and staff treating them like royalty. 

They had their last dance practice after finishing the welcome speech and after that it got hectic, the girls and boys separated for hair and make-up. People stressing around and yelling while Raven and Clarke just stared at each other and bursted out in laughter. They honestly couldn’t understand what they had agreed to. 

”I must say you look amazing though” Raven stared at her once they finally where done.   
”You don’t look bad yourself”   
”We look ridiculous, don’t we?”  
”Beautiful though” Clarke looked at herself in the mirror, her hair was perfectly curled, she was wearing a light blue dress with a teasing cleavage. The dress even had some glitter in it, she hated the fact that she actually liked what she saw. She never really dressed up like this, like some sort of fairy princess - it was a first for everything.   
”Do you think the boys cleaned up?” Raven wondered.  
”Yeah I do” Clarke could imagine Wells in a nice suit, maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad after all.   
”Clarke” Her mother stared at her with heart eyes. ”You look absolutely stunning and so do you Raven” Abby smiled.   
”Thank you” Raven smiled back.   
”I am so happy you finally wanted to be a part of this, let me take a picture of you two” Her mom was excited.   
”There will be photographs out there”   
”This is personal for me, come on” Her mother forced them to get together. ”Smile!”   
”Okay that’s enough” Clarke sighed after a few poses.   
”Yes it’s almost time for your grand entrance, I need to go out there and get ready. It will be so fun to introduce the two of you” Abby gave them both a hug before disappearing.   
”Let’s do this” Clarke nodded towards her friend.  
”Let’s do this” Raven nodded back. 

Clarke actually felt a little bit nervous once they where standing in line, they where gonna walk downstairs one by one - all focus on them while their escort would be waiting downstairs. Her mother would introduce them and the audience would be staring at her and only her for a few minutes. 

She took a deep breath once she heard how Abby started to welcome everyone for this special evening. Applauding and cheering echoed and the first girl was introduced, the line went faster than Clarke expected and suddenly Raven Reyes was called out. 

”The extraordinary Miss Raven Reyes escorted by the handsome Rafael, in honor of this evening she is wearing a yellow dress to represent the light in life and I must say she looks amazing” Abby cheered in the microphone while Clarke saw how her friend walked down the stairs, she couldn’t see the audience from where she was standing but she knew almost the whole school was waiting downstairs.   
”The next girl is very special to me” Her mother stared and Clarke swallowed as she took her first step. ”It’s my daughter Clarke who is wearing the same dress I did so many years ago…and she looks stunning” Lights flashed on her and she was forced to move forward, she felt shaky in her high heels. She made a quick glance over the area and it was packed with people, why the fuck did she agree to this. Okay deep breaths, look at Wells - she searched for the spot he was planned to stand in but he wasn’t there. Didn’t they practice this, did she forget something?   
”Her escort tonight is no other than Jaha’s son…” Her mom stopped talking, something was wrong - Wells was missing. ”Jaha a person we all adore and we couldn’t be more proud to have his son here” Abby was stalling and Clarke had frozen. She stiffed and didn’t know if she should continue to go down or just go back upstairs again, what would be more embarrassing? 

It felt like forever, it was quiet in the room and even her mom struggled to drag this even longer. Where the fuck was Wells? He wanted this, not her? Finally a silhouette moved from the audience and she figured it was Wells who was approaching the practiced spot.   
”With some sudden changes we have another beautiful escort, everyone give a warm applaud for our own Lexa Woods” Abby cheered and finally it wasn't so quiet anymore but Clarke still felt paralyzed. She was surprised over the brunette standing downstairs, Lexa looked at her and nodded carefully and Clarke turned to life again. 

She moved quicker now and Lexa was ready with a helping hand and helped her the last few steps.   
”What are you doing?” Clarke whispered once she could breath again as her mother moved on to the next girl so that everyone could focus on something else.  
”Saving your ass from being stood up” Lexa whispered back.   
”I can’t believe this” Clarke was shocked.   
”Just smile” Lexa calmed her as she placed her hand on Clarke’s back. ”And dance with me” Lexa made a move and Clarke followed.   
”Thank you” Clarke sighed.   
”I must say you look beautiful” Lexa smiled at her.  
”You too” Clarke studied the brunette, she sure was stunning this evening as well.   
”I know you don’t want to hear this” Lexa locked eyes with her, it was so intimate suddenly. ”But I want to apologize Clarke and you should let me”   
”Okay” Clarke was almost mesmerized by the green eyes.   
”I should’ve told you I know that, you must know that I trust you Clarke” Lexa whispered.   
”Did you really think I would leave you?”   
”Yeah…I honestly don’t know how my mindset worked back then. I was under pressure and acted without thinking about the consequences. I honestly thought that keeping you away from this was the right thing to do”   
”You know me better than that” Clarke shook her head but she had a smile on her face, maybe it was that Miss Flame magic in the air, but in this moment with the music playing in the background and them swinging back and forth to it in fancy dresses - it was hard to be angry.   
”Yeah” Lexa couldn't help but smile back.  
”Costia won’t like this” Clarke told her while Lexa spun her around.  
”I ended it with her” Lexa told her.  
”I didn’t know” Clarke was surprised.   
”I have made plenty mistakes this year and…yeah I’m just trying to find my balance again”   
”At least you saved me from embarrassment tonight” Clarke said. ”Thank you”   
”Where is Wells anyways?” Lexa wondered.   
”He must have a good reason not to be here” Clarke shrugged. ”It’s not like him”   
”So I guess things are going pretty great between the two of you?”   
”It’s easy with Wells…” Clarke nodded. ”No secrets and no lies”   
”Yeah” Lexa looked away as she knew the blonde meant her.   
”And he will have the balls to tell me why he is not here right now instead of pushing me away” Clarke continued her rant.   
”Damn right I have” Wells interrupted them, he looked angry and the girls let go of each other. ”Are you for real Clarke?”   
”What’s happening?” The blonde was shocked.   
”You’re gonna talk about lies and secrets when you are the same as her?” He scoffed.  
”Okay can we take this somewhere else?” Clarke tried to hush him down while she dragged him off the dance floor so they could speak in private, Lexa followed them.   
”What is this all about?” Clarke asked. ”Where have you been?”   
”Your ex came to see me and no, not his one” He looked at Lexa. ”Finn”   
”For fuck sakes” Clarke wined. ”What did he tell you?”   
”He speeded me up to date, how you have been helping her? Did you just use me all this time to get back with her?” Wells was angry.   
”No, what are you talking about?”   
”So that file… actually now that you are here Lexa” He looked at her and Clarke swallowed, fuck this was not gonna end well. ”Did you get your file that you asked for?”   
”What file?” Lexa was confused and looked at Clarke.  
”I can explain okay?” Clarke was stressed.  
”What is he talking about?” Lexa crossed her arms.   
”I can’t believe this” Wells sighed. ”You are a liar Clarke, you are even worse than her” He scoffed again.   
”Please can we talk about this?” Clarke tried.  
”At least she did it to protect you, you put me in risk with yours. I can’t even look at you right now”   
”Wells” Clarke yelled behind him but he wasn’t stopping.  
”Okay what the hell did just happen?” Lexa stared at her.  
”Fuck” Clarke breathed.  
”What file Clarke?” She was firm.  
”I made him steal your file from my moms office…I just wanted to help”   
”This is unbelievable, Clarke do you realize how stupid that is? If this comes out you have just put me in even more danger, don’t you see how that looks? It’s like cleaning away the evidence?”   
”No that’s not why I did it…” Clarke didn't know how to explain herself.  
”You have given me so much shit for not being honest, you’re a hypocrite you know that right?”   
”Lexa…I needed to do something”   
”Please don’t, we don’t need to hurt more people because of this. Wells was innocence in this and what you did to him…How can you look me in eyes and talk about honesty after that?”   
”No one is gonna find out” Clarke told her.  
”This is not healthy, I never meant to turn you into this. This is why I wanted you to stay out of it”   
”I’m sorry”   
”You don’t owe me an apology” Lexa shook her head.   
”With the file there is no evidence, don’t you see. Without that Finns words will just be that, words”   
”Oh Clarke…Without that file I look even more suspect.”   
”We can still talk to my parents” Clarke didn’t know how to save this, she had really fucked it up.  
”No” Lexa took a step back.   
”Please” Clarke pleaded.  
”I know you just tried to help Clarke but please don’t…You have been lying to me and Wells and look where it got us. You can throw as much shit at me for what I did…but this was cold Clarke”   
”I’m sorry” Clarke literally didn’t know what to say, Lexa looked so disappointed in her.   
”You’re sorry you got caught” Lexa told her and Clarke realized she was the idiot here, she had blamed Finn and Lexa for being liars and bad people when she was even worse herself.  
”I fucked up Lexa”   
”Why did you find Gustus?” Lexa locked eyes with her.  
”I…” Clarke couldn’t lie anymore. ”If I found him…Anya would tell me what the two of you where doing”  
”So you went behind my back? Used me to get to him? To find out about something I told you I would explain when the time was right?” Lexa scoffed and shook her head. ”And all along you have been going around calling me satan…”   
”I just wanted to help” Clarke sighed as her mother started talking in the speakers again.  
”It’s time for a slow dance, please join the contestants in this beautiful moment, another round of applause for the years Miss Flames”   
”Seems like you’re stood up anyways” Lexa rolled her eyes.   
”Don’t go Lexa” Clarke started to walk after her, she didn’t care about the stupid dance - she cared about how she had treated Lexa and Wells. How blind she had been to her actions. 

She really fucked this up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> Sorry for the wait, I have been on vacation! 
> 
> But anyways I hope you like this chapter and please leave a comment to let me know what you think! 
> 
> Take care! :)


	18. Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke finally asks for help

”Please Lexa stop” Clarke grabbed the brunettes arm as she finally caught up in her speed.  
”What Clarke?” Lexa was teary.  
”Are you…are you crying?” Clarke’s heart dropped.  
”I’m lost Clarke okay, I thought I had everything together. This is not me and has never been” Lexa took a deep breath and gathered herself. ”It may not seem that way but the only light in this darkness has been you…and now…never mind” Lexa shrugged.  
”I’m sorry, I know you have every right to be mad at me”  
”That’s the thing Clarke, I am not mad I am just disappointed. I have been so fucking lonely in this, building my walls up again to protect myself. I guess I was selfish in that way…but deep down I was hoping you would break them down again”   
”Lexa…” Clarke wasn’t used to see her emotional side.   
”I am a screw up but I don’t play with peoples feelings like you have”   
”So what about the last couple of weeks with me, they way you flirted and teased?” Clarke questioned.  
”THAT IS BECAUSE I AM STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU” Lexa raised her voice. ”What you made Wells do? That was just cruel, do you even like him?”   
”I was trying to move on because you told me to”   
”I didn’t ask for this” Lexa shook her head.   
”Listen I am sorry for what I did, you where making me go crazy with all the mysteries. I don’t think it’s fair to put all the blame on me.”   
”I’m not, I have been trying to apologize I don’t know what else to do Clarke…I did it because I love you, because I didn’t want Finn to hurt you anymore. Sure I had to use some harsh ways but it was still to keep you out of it. You used Anya, she wanted to find her brother, you used Wells to get that file and you used me to get information about…me. Can’t you see how wrong that is?”   
”Of course I can” Clarke said frustrated. ”I was blind because the only thing that has been on my mind is you, I couldn’t move on without answers.”   
”You have your answers now” Lexa sighed.   
”What can I do to make this right?”   
”Just…know that I love you Clarke” Lexa wiped a tear away. ”Goodbye”   
”Can we talk about this later?” The blonde yelled behind her but didn’t get an reply. 

Clarke understood why, she screwed this up badly and sadly Lexa wasn’t the only person she had to apologize to. She made her way to Wells dorm still shaking from her conversation with her ex but Clarke still knocked on the door with steady hands. 

”What?” Wells glared at her.   
”Listen, please let me explain” Clarke looked at his bed and noticed a bag. ”Are you leaving?”  
”I can’t stay here right now” Wells had already changed from his suit.   
”You don’t have to leave because of me”   
”I need a break from all of this, at least for a while” He continued to throw clothes in the bag.   
”I am sorry that I lied…I never thought someone would notice”   
”So you’re sorry you got caught?”   
”I am sorry I made you do it, I am sorry that I lied…but I never lied about us”   
”It’s hard to believe that right now”   
”I know” Clarke breathed.   
”Are you still in love with Lexa?” Wells sighed and looked at her serious. ”Answer me Clarke” He raised his voice as she was hesitating.  
”YES, okay! I tried to move on Wells - I wanted to because you are amazing, kind, sweet, loving and caring”  
”But I’m not her right?”   
”Don’t leave the school because of me, I know how much you love this place”  
”Right now, not so much” Wells zipped his bag and threw it over his shoulder. ”Goodbye Clarke” He left her there standing alone in his room. She was heartbroken, the pain in his eyes was buried in her mind. Not only his pain, Lexa’s green eyes filled with sorrow was there to. 

Clarke needed this drama to end, they needed help. She moved her feet to the top of the Polis School and grabbed her key to her parents apartment. She knew they weren’t back yet from Miss Flame but she was about to wait there until they where. 

Right now she felt empty inside, hopeless and scared. She hurt two people she care about deeply, she however finally understood Lexa better. She saw the bigger picture because now she was a liar to. She thought she did what was best for her and she didn’t tell Wells because she wanted to protect him. It was kind of ironical to think about. 

Finally after what felt like forever she could hear the door unlock and her parents walked in with smiles on their faces.   
”Clarke?” Her mother looked at her surprised. ”We have been looking for you all evening, what happened?”   
”Mom” Clarke started sobbing immediately and her mother went to hug her. ”Dad”   
”Oh darling” Her mom comforted her.   
”What happened?” Her father put a hand on her shoulder.  
”I fucked up” She cried. ”For real this time and I…” Clarke took a few deep breaths. ”I need your help”  
”Okay, okay…schh” Her mother hushed her down.   
”You can tell us anything love” Her dad assured her.   
”I think you want to sit down for this” Clarke looked at them and her parents sat down in front of her at the kitchen table.   
”Did somebody hurt you?” Jake carefully asked.   
”I need to start from the beginning” Clarke took another deep breath and collected herself before she started explaining the situation. She talked about how Finn was harassing Lexa, how Anya had tried to help her - that they kept it a secret to her and that leading to her stealing the file from her mothers office. How Wells left the school and how sad Lexa was, it was a rollercoaster but her parents listened patiently.   
”Clarke…” Her father shook his head. ”You should’ve come to me sooner, this is to much to handle for teenagers”   
”They’re all scared to go back to the streets dad”   
”Listen…I know what Finn has done is horrible but he needs help” Her mother sighed. ”I spent a lot of time with him when he first got here, getting him clean. He is a good kid”   
”Abby…you can’t be serious?” Jake looked at her. ”He tortured our daughter and other kids for weeks”   
”And we didn’t notice there where drugs here, we failed him Jake”   
”Mom?” Clarke didn’t understand why she defended him.  
”I am not saying that he shouldn’t be punished but if we can get him clean we should give him another chance. If he screws up again…well that’s another story”   
”If he is in rehab…at least he’s not here.” Her father thought about it. ”I still can’t believe all of this has going on and we had no idea”   
”Can you help Lexa?” Clarke asked, that was the only thing she cared about.  
”We’re not gonna kick her out but we need to talk to her, we want her to feel safe here” Abby told her.  
”Yeah” Her dad nodded. ”There will be consequences for your actions but we won’t threw you out”   
”With Finn you should” Clarke sighed.   
”I wont let him go down easy for this” Her dad said.  
”You cared for him once Clarke, this is not who he is.” Abby looked at her. ”I know it’s hard to hear this but we want to help them, that’s why we started the school. That’s why both me and your dad need to have a serious conversation about this in general. Who knows what else the kids are going through, what they are hiding form us”   
”Indeed we will” Jake looked at his wife.  
”I don’t think Wells will forgive me for what I did…or Lexa…” Clarke started to tear up again. ”Please help them, help Lexa…I don’t care about Finn I just want her to feel safe…”   
”Wells is Jaha’s son, he will come around. I have seen Wells grow into the man he is today and I couldn't be more proud, he is ahead of all the kids here…but he had guidance like the rest of them don’t. Give him some space, have patience and he will find it in his heart to forgive you” Jake said.   
”Lexa will too sweetie” Her mother smiled at her. ”This has probably been terrible for her…and I think it’s pretty sweet how she wanted to keep you out of it. In the end her plan didn’t work out and you lied to her as well. You both did wrong and you both have to own up to it, talk it out”   
”I think we are past saving…” Clarke sighed.  
”Don’t give up hope…” Abby looked at Jake. ”I can’t believe we where to busy to see that our daughter was struggling”  
”I am so sorry Clarke, I know you talked to me…how you felt left out. I don’t want you to feel that way, you are our first priority”   
”I just…don’t know what to do…” Clarke and her parents suddenly looked at the front door as someone was knocking and it caught their attention.   
”Who can that be?” Abby stood up.  
”I got it” Jake looked at his wife and she sat down again. 

Clarke wondered who it could be, maybe it was Lexa who finally got the courage to talk to her parents? Or maybe Jaha who wanted to scream at them for letting their daughter hurt Wells. Her mind was spinning until her father finally opened the door.

”Anya?” He looked at the girl who was holding back tears.  
”Jake…It’s Gustus….he’s gone, the guest room is all empty…I don’t know what to do!”   
”Oh…” Jake looked back at Clarke and Abby. ”I am sorry Anya but my daughter needs me right now, we can talk about this tomorrow?”   
”But…” Anya sighed, she seemed scared and lost.   
”I’m sorry” Jake put a hand on her shoulder. ”We will figure it out, okay?”  
”Okay…” Anya left and Jake closed the door.  
”What the hell is going on?” Abby frowned. ”More students crying”   
”Her brother means the world to her…” Jake sat back down at the table. ”But you Clarke…means the world to me”   
”Thank you dad” Clarke half smiled at him, it felt good to be chosen first for once.   
”I will go check on Lexa” He told her. ”She needs to know that we are on her side”   
”I can come with you” Abby suggested.  
”No stay with Clarke, she shouldn’t be alone right now. I will try to make Lexa join us so we can all talk about it”  
”Okay”   
”Be nice” Clarke looked at her father who nodded towards her. 

Once her father left Clarke and her mother moved to the living room, Clarke placed her head in her mothers lap and Abby played with her hair. It was comforting, there was no other place Clarke wanted to be right now in this moment. 

It felt like forever, what was going on? Why did it take so long? Maybe Lexa was angry with her for telling the truth? Maybe her father yelled at her? So many what if’s was spinning in her head even if she tried to focus on her mother. 

Finally the door unlocked again and her father walked in, he was alone and Clarke sat up immediately. Something was wrong, she could feel it in her whole body.

”What is it?” Clarke looked at him.   
”Clarke…” Her father sat down next to her and grabbed her hand.  
”What…?” She stiffed.  
”I went to Lexa’s dorm but she didn’t open the door…”  
”And…?”   
”I went to grab an extra key…” Her father sighed.  
”And…?”   
”She’s gone Clarke…the whole room was empty, all her belongings…”  
”No…that can’t be true”   
”I’m figuring she left with Gustus…”  
”No… no no no, mom, dad…you have to find her!”   
”Come here” Her mother put her arms around her again and Clarke cried out. She got three people to leave the school today, and it was all her fault. 

Lexa was gone because of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I hope you like the new chapter and as always let me know what you think! 
> 
> Much love!


	19. Forgivness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke works on her new art project as she tries to process everything that happened.

It had been three weeks since The Flame and there had be no sign of either Lexa or Wells, at least Clarke knew where Wells was…it was harder thinking about Lexa - she had no idea where the brunette was or if she was safe. 

The good news is that Finn was gone, he had been sent to rehab - to her surprise he didn’t make a scene about it, he went silently with her father. The school seemed more quiet, it was usually filled with loud noises, laughter, running in the hallways and slamming doors. People where gossiping about the missing students and Clarke didn’t blame them. 

Her parents did take this seriously and had already taken action, people lockers had been searched, meetings with new teachers to hire, questioning students and they even managed to get Jaha back. They needed him, he was a role model to a lot of people at the school and he was gonna be there to help her parents guide the kids to the right direction. 

Clarke was glad she told them, she wasn’t alone in this anymore and she didn’t have to lie about it. The guilt however was killing her, what she had done to two of her closets friends - how she treated Lexa when she was basically worse than her and how she betrayed Wells trust. She needed to make things right, she just didn’t know how. 

She looked at the colors she had picked out for her new art project, she was sitting in the middle of Wells room and studied the white walls. She had decided to give the room a make-over but she wanted it to be perfect. It wouldn’t fix her problems but it was a good way to keep her mind distracted, she could focus on creating only. 

It was just the fact that she felt so uninspired. Usually it just happened but now she had been starring at the walls that felt like forever, she lost track of how long she had been in there. 

”Aren’t you supposed to use that color?”   
”Huh?” Clarke looked around and saw Anya starring at her, she hadn’t noticed the door opening.   
”You need to snap out of it Clarke” She sat down next to her on the floor and studied the white wall in front of them as well.   
”How do you do it?” Clarke sighed.   
”I focus on the fact that I found my brother, that I know he will protect Lexa…and that he will come back for me”   
”How do you know that?”   
”He left me a letter, I found it the day after they left”   
”We should look for them, they don’t have to hide”   
”They don’t want to be found right now…” Anya shook her head.   
”Listen…I am sorry I have been such a jerk to you” Clarke looked at Anya, defeated.   
”When I found my brother I understood why you where so protective over your father, it’s family - and sometimes it’s hard to see them care about someone else”   
”It’s not fair, it’s selfish”   
”Well, it depends I guess. I felt the same way with Lexa and Gustus but then I realized that she need him too”   
”Like you needed my father”   
”Yeah…” Anya slightly smiled at her. ”So…when you think of Wells what pops up in your mind?”  
”Oh…” Clarke thought about it for a second. ”Kindness, strength, independence…a good heart”   
”That would be enough to be inspired, use that” Anya smiled at her now.  
”Thank you Anya” Clarke smiled back, it was weird but it felt nice. She didn’t want to fight with anyone anymore.  
”And…” Anya stood up. ”I bet Lexa will come back for you too…I could tell how much she cared for you, even when you argued she still looked at you with so much love.”   
”I screwed things up pretty bad”   
”Don’t forget she screwed up too…Her biggest regret”   
”I just want her to be okay you know”   
”Yeah, Gustus will make sure of that, I have to run to class”   
”See you around” Clarke looked at Anya as she closed the door behind her.

She looked back at the wall with big eyes, she could already see her vision. She never would of thought that Anya would help her feel inspired but she just did, Clarke stood up and grabbed her first color and started drawing. 

***

”Hey” Raven entered the room and looked at Clarke.   
”Hey” Clarke slightly smiled at her.   
”Feel like I never see you anymore” Raven sat down next to Clarke on the bed.   
”I just finished Wells room…It’s been taking a while…I just wanted to finish it” She had spent the last two weeks working on it.   
”So you heard, he’s coming back with Jaha tomorrow?”   
”Tomorrow?” Clarke gasped, she knew that he would be coming back soon but not this soon…now she was glad she had spent almost all her awake time painting his room.   
”Yeah, your dad just told me…he also wanted me to check on you”   
”Of course he did…Do you…do you think he will like it?” Clarke sighed. ”It feels so stupid”   
”It’s beautiful” Raven smiled. ”You’re so talented, have you thought anything about that art school I mentioned?”   
”I read a little bit about it…I don’t know if I am ready to leave The Polis School”   
”I don’t want you too…believe me but I can’t stand seeing my best friend like this anymore, maybe a new start is what you need. We could still hang out on the weekends you know, talk on the phone…thank god for video calls”   
”You know it’s not the same…and I’m not sure that would solve my problems”   
”I see how your face lights up when you paint…”   
”They have art here too”   
”Like I said…I don’t want you to leave, just think about it. This school carries a lot of bad memories for you”   
”It also have the good ones you know. I have done a lot of thinking…What happened with me and Lexa, I mean I do understand why she wanted to protect me, it’s just the way she did it…you know I don’t want her to push me away when she’s hurting, I know that now. I look back at it and all I wish is that I could’ve been there for her.”   
”I think she has regrets dealing with that as well”   
”I couldn’t think clear…I was obsessed with just finding out why I wasn’t good enough for her and I didn’t care about who I hurt on the way. I wanted to move on with Wells, honestly he was great and I was to blind to see that I was using him because in the moment I truly didn’t understand”   
”Are you going to talk to him?” Raven asked.   
”I have too…I truly care for him and I want him to know how sorry I am”   
”You seem to be…alright?” Raven seemed surprised.  
”I think I am…I’m going to make things right with Wells and if I ever see Lexa again, I will try to get some closure once and for all”   
”You still love her huh?” It was hard to fool Raven.  
”I think I always will” Clarke shrugged.   
”Well you know I’m always here for you girl”   
”You are the best, I love you” Clarke hugged her best friend and Raven hugged her back.   
”Don’t go soft on me, you know I don’t like that” But Raven smiled into the hug.  
”Oh shut up, you love this” Clarke smiled as well. 

***

The next day Clarke was nervous, she had seen Wells and Jaha park and grab their suitcases on the parking lot early in the morning. Immediately she grabbed had grabbed the keys to his dorm and rushed over. She wanted to see his reaction and she wanted to talk to him as soon as possible. 

So she was sitting on his bed that now had a dark blue cover, his favorite color and tapping her leg up and down. It took about 10 minutes before she could hear the keys in the door and Wells finally walked in, he dropped his bag and gasped.  
”God you scared me” Wells took a deep breath before closing the door behind him.  
”I’m sorry…” Clarke stood up.   
”What…what’s all off this?” Wells looked around and it was hard to tell if he liked it or not.   
”Listen…please give me just a -”  
”I’m listening” He interrupted her.   
”The day you took me to that view point” Clarke looked back at the wall behind her - she had recreated that view on his wall. ”That was the moment I realized that you where someone I wanted to get to know better, you didn’t know me but it didn’t matter…you just wanted to make feel better that day and you did.” Clarke did have a speech planned out but it was all blank now, she had to just speak from her heart.   
”It’s a great view” Wells nodded.  
”You made me laugh and you…you where the first person in a really long time to treat me with respect and kindness and unfortunately I took it for granted and I will always regret that. You may not want me in your life anymore and I get that…I just wanted to you to know that…” Clarke took a few breaths. ”I know you didn’t really felt welcome here but this school needs people like you, with a warm heart, that cares about people and stands up for what is right. It wont fix shit I know that but maybe making you room feel more like home would make you feel more like home here…” Clarke knew she was talking to much but it was the nerves.   
”Clarke…the room looks amazing” He chuckled and she looked at him surprised.   
”I am so sorry that I lied to you Wells…but I never lied about our friendship…I think however that my emotions where a bit confused at the time. I wanted to be with you so bad in my mind but my heart wanted something else”   
”Honestly Clarke…I think I always knew, I mean we started talking about your ex, I knew you still had feelings for Lexa but I got ahead of myself as well”   
”You’re not mad anymore?” Clarke questioned him.  
”I was, I was really pissed at you but I think I was mostly heartbroken because I finally realized you didn’t feel the same way for me, I needed some space and it seems like you did as well. You look healthier Clarke”   
”I guess…so does that mean we can still be friends?” Clarke wondered.  
”Come here” Wells opened his arms and Clarke hugged him.  
”I missed you” Clarke held him tight. ”I will never lie to you again”   
”Just…one question” Wells let go off her and started looking at the painting that was covering a whole wall.  
”Yeah?” Clarke got nervous again.  
”How am I supposed to explain the penis on my wall?” Wells bursted out in laughter and Clarke did the same in relief.  
”Oh…” She laughed as she looked at the Polis School from above, still shaped like a penis. ”I guess you put the blame on me” She chuckled.   
”It feels good to be back” Wells smiled but it went away as quickly. ”And…” He sighed. ”I also have some news for you”   
”What?”   
”I know where Lexa and Gustus is, I was holding back because I was mad at you…”   
”You know where she is?” Clarke whispered as her heartbeat raised.   
”Ironically we met at the parking lot the night I…or when we both left the school, she told me to keep it secret but I think she knew I would tell you”   
”Oh god, I need to get my dad and bring them back”   
”Okay okay” Wells nodded.   
”I guess we are partners in crime once again” Clarke smiled at him.   
”I guess we are, just don’t fall in love with me will you” He winked.   
”I’m not sure if I missed that” Clarke chuckled, she did. She had truly missed his sarcasm and jokes. 

Not only did he forgive her, he knew where Lexa was. Things where finally going her direction instead of against her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a while...and I'm sorry for the wait! What can I say, sometimes life happens and time suddenly flies by. I hope there is still a few people reading the story as I am determent to finish it! 
> 
> Hope you're all well and take care! 
> 
> And as always, please leave a comment to let me know what you think! :) 
> 
> (also how weird that next week is the last episode of the 100, it's been a hell of a ride these 7 seasons. And last episode we got a flashback of Lexa's "I will always be with you" quote. Still crossing my fingers for her to be in the last episode!)


	20. Chicken curry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back, back again? Tell a friend

Lexa looked at Gustus surprised when someone knocked on their door, they didn’t get visitors.   
”Who could that be?” She wondered.  
”Stay here” Gustus stood up, the apartment only had one room so she could still see the front door.   
”Where else would I go” Lexa said ironically.  
”Who is it?” Gustus raised his voice.   
”Gustus?” Anya’s voice could be heard from the outside and Gustus opened the door, his sister flew into his arms. ”You idiot” She wined but she looked happier than ever to see her brother again, Lexa stood up, she was hoping there was more visitors.   
”Hi…” Jake walked into the apartment. ”She found out I was going to see you and she wouldn’t take no for an answer”   
”She’s stubborn” Gustus scoffed.   
”I think we have a lot to talk about” Jake closed the door behind him and Lexa sat down disappointed, she had wished for Clarke to be there so bad.   
”Mr Griffin, am I in trouble?” Lexa sighed but she was also tired of running.   
”Lexa” Jake sat down next to her. ”I’m so sorry that you felt like you couldn’t come talk to us, Clarke told me and Abby everything.”   
”She did?”   
”Lexa you’re not in trouble” Anya looked at her as it seemed like Jake never got to the point. ”We are here to bring you back”   
”Finn is not at the school anymore, he’s in rehab. You must be traumatized after what he put you through”   
”I’m better now” Lexa sighed. ”I’m confused”   
”I created the Polis School to help kids, I failed Finn and I am taking actions - i don’t want another kid to fall back into bad patterns. I am getting more help and I am here because this in not the life you deserve Lexa, I am asking you to come back to the school”   
”What about Gustus”   
”I know you’re a bit to old to attend the school but we could use another teacher in self-defense” Jake smiled at him. ”Both of you are welcome”   
”I don’t know…” Gustus shrugged.   
”We can talk it over and you can think about it” Jake suggested.   
”If that means I can be with my sister…” He looked at Anya. ”We missed to much of each others life already”   
”Please say that’s a yes?” She looked at him with big eyes.  
”What the heck, yes Mr Griffin, it would be an honor and I am forever grateful that you have been taking care off my sister.”  
”Lexa…you don’t look that happy?” Anya looked at her.  
”I don’t know if I can go back there…” Lexa wasn’t sure she could face all the mistakes she had made in that school.   
”I will be there for you” Jake said. ”Whatever you need, someone to talk to, guide you…”   
”Come Lexa, you miss that school everyday. I know you never complained but I know you hate this place and this life” Gustus kneeled down next to her. ”You’re probably the strongest person I met, that school has nothing on you and you deserve a spot there”   
”Well I can’t stay here alone…” Lexa took a deep breath. ”Thank you Jake…I mean Mr Griffin”   
”You know you can call me Jake” He went for a hug and at first Lexa hesitated but then she caved in, his arms felt safe and steady. She didn’t know she needed that hug until that moment.   
”Let’s pack your stuff and get going” Anya cheered and Lexa finally smiled and quickly wiped a tear away from her cheek. 

***

It felt weird being back at the school, Lexa was surprised they had kept her room - nothing was moved or changed. It was like she had never left, well it was a bit dustier but that’s it. She didn’t have much to un-pack and her mind couldn’t stop thinking about one person. Lexa knew she had to go see her, it could not wait. Lexa made her way to the dorm room and gently knocked on the door, it didn’t take long until Clarke opened the door. She had almost forgot how breathtaking beautiful she was.   
”Hi” Lexa said nervously.   
”Hi” Clarke moved so that she could enter the room.   
”Where is Raven?”   
”Class…” Clarke followed her every movement.   
”I’m not sure you want to talk to me but…I wanted to let you know I’m coming back to the school”   
”Why wouldn’t I want to talk to you?” Clarke wondered.   
”You didn’t come with Jake and Anya…and I just…”   
”I didn’t want you to hesitate coming back…I wasn’t sure…” Clarke struggled. ”I wanted to come, I really did”   
”Oh…” Lexa slightly smiled.   
”Are you okay?” Clarke got closer and suddenly it was harder to breathe.  
”I think so” Lexa said but wasn’t ready for Clarke to go in for a hug, it took a second for her to throw her arms around the familiar body.   
”I missed you” Clarke whispered and Lexa held tighter, god knows she had missed the blonde too.   
”I know” Lexa sighed. ”I’m sorry”   
”Do you think we can…still be…friends?” Clarke wasn’t sure how to word it.   
”Friends…” Lexa didn’t like the sound of it, well being friends of course but she wanted more than that.   
”I still want you in my life”   
”Yeah…” They let go of each other, that hug lasted long but still not long enough. ”A new beginning I guess, I just want to move forward”   
”Me too” Clarke nodded as her eyes flickered to Lexa’s lips, the brunette caught it because she had struggled herself to not look at them.   
”Do you want to have dinner with me?” Lexa asked.  
”Like a date?” Clarke tilted her head.   
”Um…” Lexa wanted it to be one. ”No, just so we can talk about everything that happened, I think we both need it”   
”I would like that” Clarke said, it was strange how awkward it was between them - none of them knew how to behave around the other anymore.   
”What about tonight?” Lexa suggested.   
”That would be great!” Clarke got excited.   
”You seem to be doing good” Lexa didn’t mean for it to sound as something bad, she was just a bit surprised.   
”The last weeks have been an emotional roller coaster but I did a lot of thinking and I realized I was pretty broken, it all started with Finn and went down hill from there. I needed to focus on myself and honestly, I feel like I can finally think clear - I see things with new eyes”   
”I’m glad to hear that” Lexa smiled at her, it was nice to see Clarke so confident.   
”And I am glad you are back”   
”Yeah…well I did miss a lot of classes. I need to go see your dad to plan my schedule”   
”Of course” Clarke nodded.   
”See you later?”   
”Yeah” 

Lexa closed the door behind her and gathered herself, Clarke seemed happy - it was something different about her. It was hard to melt, Lexa had spent the last weeks constantly thinking about her ex. Wondering what she had been up to, how she was feeling, what she had could done differently - how she wished she could’ve hold her at night. 

Not that she wasn’t glad to see Clarke doing fine, it was the feeling of them drifting a part more and more. 

***

”Did you miss the school cafeteria?” Clarke chuckled as the entered the room.  
”Honestly, Gustus is not the best chef…and we didn’t really have much money so this is like heaven right now” Lexa looked over the crowded room.   
”I’m sorry you felt like you had to leave…” Clarke sighed as she looked at the menu. ”They serve that chicken you like today”   
”No way” Lexa got excited.   
”Hey” Clarke greeted the worker behind the desk as she had many times. ”Can we have two of the chicken curry please?”   
”Coming right up princess”   
”The nickname that never dies” Lexa chuckled.   
”To bad Finn started it…” Clarke rolled her eyes.   
”Did he reach out to you?” Lexa sat down to the closets available table that was empty.   
”Not yet…but I think it’s just a matter of time. That 12-step program usually contains making a mends with the people you hurt along the way”   
”Would you be okay with that?” Lexa wondered.  
”Honestly…I don’t know. I am just glad that he is not here anymore”   
”That makes two of us” Lexa was nervous and wasn’t sure how to handle her body or where to look, Clarke however seemed calm.   
”People are starring” Clarke looked around and rolled her eyes. ”Does it bother you?”   
”You know that shit never bothered me” Lexa didn’t even care to meet the curious looks from her classmates.  
”I always admired that about you…they way you never cared about what anyone else thinks”   
”Takes a lot of energy, I care about things that matter”   
”So…” Clarke got interrupted.  
”Two chicken curry, enjoy”   
”Thank you” Clarke smiled at her.  
”What where you saying?” Lexa took a bite, she was actually starving.   
”Do I still matter…?” Clarke asked carefully.   
”Of course” Lexa shrugged. ”That’s what I wanted to talk about, to see if we could move forward from all of this?”   
”I want too, I wasn’t sure you wanted that”   
”I want it now” Lexa said.   
”Okay” Clarke smiled now and took her first bite. ”This is delicious actually”   
”I know right?”   
”Look who’s back?” Raven passed their table.   
”Raven” Lexa looked at her, waiting to see if the Latina was mad or at ease.   
”Good to see you” Raven nodded as in we are good.   
”No more Satan nicknames?” Lexa teased and it eased the tension.   
”I’m going easy on the first day kiddo” Raven smiled now.   
”Of course you are”   
”So, what about an old school night tonight? Playing games and have some drinks in our dorm?” Raven looked at Clarke to see if it was a good idea.  
”That would be fun, what do you say?” Clarke looked at Lexa.   
”Yeah, sure”   
”I’ll talk to the others, you enjoy your little date and we meet up when you’re done” Raven cheered and left them in an awkward silence.   
”Does she think we are dating again?” Lexa raised her eyebrows.   
”You know her…she loves to teas”   
”But…” Lexa took a sip of her water and studied the blonde for a second to gather her courage.   
”But…?” Clarke smiled at her.  
”Do you want to be my date for tonight?”   
”Oh…”   
”We don’t have too…sorry I just got caught in the moment, we are taking things slow I know”   
”Hey” Clarke stopped her. ”I’d love that”   
”Yeah?” Lexa breathed out in relief.   
”Yeah” Clarke smiled at her. ”It’s cute to see you all nervy, it’s not like you”   
”I guess I have a weakness after all” Lexa shook her head but smiled, this was going better than expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoooooola peeps, a new Sunday chapter! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy, glad to see people are still reading the story! Please leave a comment and let me know what you think! :)


	21. Truth or dare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The friends get together for a little game night

Clarke couldn’t help but to smile, they where all in her and Raven’s dorm like old times talking shit and playing games. Monty and Jasper was arguing about the music, Murphy and Bellamy talked about soccer game, Octavia and Lincoln where making out, Raven yelled a lot - luckily she was Raf’s problem now and her and Lexa was sat next to each other enjoying the moment. 

Lexa was usually pretty quiet but she seemed more quiet than usual, maybe due to the circumstances of course but Clarke felt like she had to ease the tension. 

”Should we go for a truth or dare like old times?” Clarke suggested and yes maybe she wanted to be dared to do something with Lexa. They needed a push right now and she had to know if there was still sparks between them.  
”Isn’t that getting a little weird in this group?” Jasper wondered. ”Every girl is basically taken”  
”Who said it had to be sexual?” Clarke teased. ”You can either invite some girls over OR - we play because it’s fun, no hard feelings”   
”You can always pick truth” Octavia looked at Lincoln serious but it turned to a smile real quick.  
”Yeah, whatever we are in” Raven sat down on the floor and everyone else followed to that they could create a circle.   
”Bell, do you want the honor?” Clarke handed him a bottle and he placed it on the floor and made it spin. It finally stopped on Octavia.   
”My sister…perfect…” Bellamy shrugged. ”Truth or dare I guess”   
”Truth” Octavia said.   
”Who would you save in a death situation, me or Lincoln?” Bellamy chuckled.  
”What kind of question is that? I would leave you both and save myself if we where in a death situation” Octavia winked and the group cheered on her. ”Okay, let’s spin this thing”   
”That’s you!” Jasper pointed at Monty.  
”I would say that’s you!” Monty didn’t agree.  
”You two…” Octavia rolled her eyes. ”Jasper truth or dare?”   
”Fine…DARE” He said proudly.  
”I dare you to kiss Monty” Octavia smirked.  
”This will be interesting” Lexa whispered next to Clarke.  
”Yeah” Clarke chuckled but her whole body was tingling from Lexa getting so close and her breath lingering on her neck.   
”Wow…” Monty shook his head but looked at Jasper. ”Do it quickly”   
”Are you ready? I’m coming in?” The boys kiss lasted shorter than a second and everyone got disappointed in their dare.   
”Let’s be more specific next time” Raven nodded to Octavia.   
”Okay…game on” Jasper grabbed the bottle and it landed on Lexa.   
”Homecoming queen…Truth or dare?” Jasper looked excited.   
”Um…” Lexa looked around at the friendly faces who was waiting patiently.   
”So…?” Jasper was ready to play and Lexa looked at Clarke like she was confused.  
”Truth I guess” Lexa finally said and Clarke couldn’t help but to feel disappointed but Lexa kept it safe, she got that.   
”Did you and Gustus ever….you know, slept together?” Jasper looked proud over his question but everyone else in the room shook their heads.  
”Jasper” Lexa smiled at him. ”You do know that I am a lesbian right?”   
”Oh…I thought that you where bi like Clarke… fuck I wasted a question didn’t I? It’s hard to keep up these days”   
”No, nothing ever happened between us…” Lexa shrugged and it was her turn to spin the bottle.   
”Oh…I pick truth” Bellamy sighed.   
”Why is everyone so boring” Raven wined.   
”Did you ever or do you have crush on someone in this room?” Lexa asked.  
”Maybe…” Bellamy chuckled. ”A little crush perhaps”   
”WHO?” Monty wondered.  
”She didn’t ask for names” Bellamy teased.  
”I told you guys to be more specific” Raven complained.   
”The bottle is on you Raven…truth or dare?”   
”DARE” Raven said proudly.  
”I dare you to kiss the person that you least want to kiss”   
”I have a boyfriend?” Raven tried.  
”Hey, I actually want to see” Rafael laughed.   
”I’m sorry Bell, I hope that crush wasn’t on me” Raven smirked as she gave him a quick kiss and wiped it away like a little kid straight after.   
”Ouch” Bellamy laughed.   
”MY TURN” Raven got the bottle and this time it felt like it was spinning forever until it finally stopped on Clarke. ”Thank you god, come on don’t be a pussy now”  
”Fine…Dare” Clarke rolled her eyes and tried her best not to look at Lexa.   
”I dare you to spend 10 minutes with whoever you want in this room in the bathroom, you can use the time doing whatever”   
”That’s not specific at all Raven?” Jasper shook his head.   
”It is specific” Raven said proudly.   
”Fine” Clarke stood up and pretended to look around in the room, she already knew who she wanted to bring, she looked down next to her and reached her hand for Lexa.  
”WOW, did not expect that” Raven said sarcastic. ”Wow”   
”Keep playing I guess” Clarke said as she and Lexa closed the door behind them. 

”This is weird” Lexa chuckled.  
”I know, Raven is weird.”  
”So, what do you wanna do for 10 minutes?”   
”Hmm…” Clarke locked eyes with the brunette, Lexa felt so pure here - like she needed guidance.  
”We don’t have to do anything, we could just wait it out”   
”Is that really how you want to spend this time?” Clarke got closer and it forced Lexa to back up at the sink.   
”Oh…” Lexa smirked as her hand carefully grabbed Clarke’s neck. ”I guess there is a few things we could do?”   
”Mmmhm” Clarke smirked, she was nervous - she had kissed Lexa so many times before. She leaned in, eager to close the gap between them. It was soft and gentle, Lexa was careful but it didn’t help. Clarke’s whole body exploded by the kiss, it felt like fireworks and butterflies, she shivered and at that moment she knew. She knew she wasn’t over her, not that it was a surprise but damn. She had not expect that explosion of emotions from a kiss.  
”Wow” Clarke breathed.  
”I know” Lexa placed her arms around Clarke’s waist. ”I don’t want us to make up during a truth or dare game locked up in a bathroom”   
”Okay…” Clarke was mesmerized and she had missed being in the arms of the person she loved.   
”You, we deserve better than that” Lexa smiled. ”If you still want this”   
”I never wanted something this bad ever” Clarke breathed.   
”Good” Lexa was finally getting her confidence back and Clarke loved it.   
”So, what now?”   
”Do you want to get out of here?” Lexa suggested.   
”I’ll go anywhere with you right now” Clarke shyly said.   
”Come on” Lexa grabbed her hand and they unlocked the bathroom.  
”Hey the time is not over” Raven said.  
”You’re gonna have to play without us” Clarke looked at her friends, they all looked eager to know what was going on.  
”There is something we have to do”  
”Each other?” Raven teased and it made their friends burst out in laughter.  
”Shut up” Clarke rolled her eyes but she chuckled at the joke, it was pretty smooth.   
”Good to see you all!” Lexa smiled at them before leading Clarke at of the room, still holding hands.  
”THATS MY GIRL!” Raven yelled behind them. 

***

”Where are we going?” Clarke laughed as they exited the school.   
”Come here” Lexa smiled as they both rushed while holding hands.   
”The bench?” Clarke smiled, it was the bench Lexa had asked her to be her girlfriend months ago.  
”Yeah…and you I’m not romantic” Lexa winked as she got down on one knee.  
”Are you proposing?” Clarke laughed as Lexa grabbed her hand.  
”Clarke” She got serious. ”A long time ago I asked you to be mine”   
”Yeah” Clarke’s heart raised.   
”I know that I let you down, I betrayed your trust and I hurt you in so many ways…and in the end you hurt me too” Lexa took a deep breath. ”But I can’t deny how I feel about you and how much I wish I could take all of this back…if you want to give us another chance, I promise to stay faithful and honest with you. I love you Clarke Griffin and I can’t wait any longer…I love you so much it hurts every second that you’re not with me”   
”Lexa” Clarke helped the brunette get to her feet again, her eyes where teary but it was not because she was sad, it was tears of joy. ”I’m sorry too…and I love you so much of course I want us back again”   
”Come here” Lexa collided them in a passionate kiss, this time it was more desperate - they missed to much, so much time wasted - so much confusion and hurt - when they had loved each other all this time.   
”God I love you” Clarke breathed through the kisses as she tried to held her as tight as possible.   
”I want you” Lexa breathed.

The girls rushed to Lexa’s room, Clarke was always grateful that she didn’t have a roommate, she closed the door and locked it. Lexa was eager to and pressed Clarke against the counter, hips digging painfully against the marble tile, their lips inches apart. Hips, chest, and thighs pressed deliciously together that Clarke felt her breath hitch and deepen. 

”Damn Lexa” Hands trailed Clarke’s sides, grip tightening at her hips, body molding against the other. Lexa drew back an inch to look at Clarke intently, green eyes tracking down Clarke’s clothed body, it took everything for Clarke to not whine in need. 

”Lexa” She pleaded as she tugged her shirt, pleased when the brunette finally crashed their lips together again. Teeth clashed and tongues battled for dominance, hands tugged at shirts and pants.

Lexa trailed kisses from Clarke’s plump red lips to her jawline, nipping and sucking and biting the skin. She mouthed wetly at Clarke’s earlobe before biting down behind her ear, enough to bruise the skin but not enough to cause serious pain. She licked at the flesh soothingly, reveling at Clarke’s heavy breathing and soft moans of pleasure. Lexa still remembered Clarke’s weaknesses perfectly. 

”Babe” Clarke tugged at Lexa’s jeans zipper, wanting the girl out of the restrictive clothing but Lexa resisted, stepping back and leaving Clarke against the counter breathing heavily.

”Let me take care of you" Lexa whispered demanding and Clarke nodded eagerly pulling Lexa closer by her grip. Lexa’s hands gripped the back of Clarke’s thighs, lifting her enough to sit on the counter. Clarke moaned as Lexa stepped between her thighs, bodies pressed close - she started tracking down kissed from Clarke’s lips and down to her collarbones. Lexa held on either side of Clarke’s black blouse and ripped the fabric apart - it was desperate but Lexa didn’t mind as buttons scattered against the floor. 

”Fuck” Lexa breathed as she admired the girl in front of her, she grabbed Clarke under her thighs again and lifted the body, she carried the girl to her bed while making out. ”You have no idea how much I missed this”   
Lexa straddled the girl on the bed as she continued to worship on Clarke’s breast as hips where rolling against the apex of the blondes thighs - hands fumbling with her unzipping Clarke’s pants. Usually she would tease more but her whole body was desperate for more. Clarke hands tangling in Lexa’s hair.  
”Babe, please” Clarke pleaded but was swallowed by Lexa’s hungry lips while her hands where trying to get Clarke’s pants off, the blonde helped her. 

Lexa shoved Clarke’s panties to the side and without warning she punched two fingers deep into Clarke’s wet cunt. The blonde moaned loudly while Lexa plunged in and out of her, stroking and curling her fingers deep within the blue eyed girl. Clarke was glad because she couldn’t had wait any longer. 

”Faster” Clarke breathed as she could feel her arousal building, marching towards the cliff that would fling her in an ocean deep of pleasure.  
"Shhh" Lexa soothed against Clarke’s ear, breath a hot pleasurable caress against the sensitive skin there. Her pace didn't let up, and her strokes only grew bolder the more whimper and needy and incoherent Clarke became. 

The blonde whined, her chin dipping and lips seeking Lexa’s, they met in an open-mouthed kiss. With Clarke whimpering and moaning, stifled by the taste of Lexa’s tongue.

"Fuck, fuck , fuck, I'm–" Clarke chanted against her lips, eyes squeezed tightly shut. Lexa’s thumb found Clarke’s clit, she circled the swollen bud at the same time she stroked the spongy flesh on Clarke’s front wall, wrist straining but mind determined to make Clarke fall.

Lexa felt proud as Clarke’s muscles seized, thighs bracketing, her neck arched back and her lips parted in a silent scream - her face in an expression of pure pleasure. Lexa didn’t withdraw her fingers and watched as her girl ride out her orgasm.   
”You’re beautiful when you come babe” Lexa whispered softly. 

Dilated green eyes met darkened blue ones and the conflagration that kept their arousal burning turned into an inferno of pure want. Clarke took command and got on top of Lexa, she tracked down kisses down to Lexa’s razor sharp jaw, before turning the brunettes head and kissing her over her shoulder, tongue licking and sucking the swollen lips. Clarke stopped to remove Lexa’s pants and underwear, she started placing kissed against Lexa’s thighs while the brunette moaned.   
"Look at me " Clarke commanded, voice deep and rough but not less arousing. Lexa’s lips parted in a soundless moan, her half-lidded eyes struggling to keep open.  
F-fuck, god you're so good, fuck– " she cried out when Clarke stroked against her walls, hitting a particular spot that made Lexa’s spine shudder in pure pleasure.

Lexa could feel herself nearing her orgasm, her mind turning foggy and her moan and groans from earlier turning into silence and quivering on her thighs. God she loved this girl. 

She could take it, Lexa came was out of control, plunging deep and fast into her orgasm, as Lexa turned to face her languidly, boneless and looking absolutely, deliciously, mind-numbingly fucked. Clarke’s swollen red lips turned up in a smirk. Lexa looped her arms around the blondes neck and pulled the girl closer

"Shut up." She kissed her languidly, almost soft and in contrast to their rough and hurried passion from earlier.  
"I didn't say anything," Clarke mumbled against her lips, kissing and nipping Lexa’s lower lip. She tightened her hold around narrow hips.  
”I - it’s been a while” Lexa smiled and hugged the naked body on top of her. Clarke only hummed and kissed Lexa some more before withdrawing and burying her head in the brunettes neck to pepper some more kisses there.  
”You ruined my blouse” Clarke chuckled between the kisses.  
”i’ll get you a new one” Lexa smiled.   
”Whats the point, you’re probably gonna destroy that one too” Clarke teased.   
”You know, I could stay in this moment forever”   
”Oh I thought you didn’t last that long” Clarke couldn’t help but tease.  
”Oh you” Lexa sighed. ”Next time I will make you suffer” She smirked.  
”Hey” Clarke lifted her head and looked into the most beautiful green eyes. ”I didn’t complain about it”   
”It’s not the last time I’m gonna hear off this, is it?” Lexa smiled.  
”I can keep a secret” Clarke winked as she kissed her quickly.   
”No more secrets remember”   
”Well, our secrets I am glad to keep for us” Clarke darted for another kiss.  
”I can live with that” Lexa smiled.   
”We are not gonna get a lot of sleep are we?”   
”Nope” Lexa smirked.   
”You know what I missed?” Clarke felt like she was crushing all over again.   
”What?”   
”Just sleeping in your arms”   
”I know” Lexa stroked some hair away from Clarke’s face. ”One day, we’re gonna have a big house - maybe some kids running around and each night you’re gonna fall in sleep in my arms”   
”Oh kids?” Clarke said playfully but the future vision sounded like a dream.   
”Maybe…”   
”Tell me about you as a kid” Clarke moved her body next to the brunettes and placed her head on Lexa’s chest.   
”Okay” Lexa smiled as she started playing with the blondes hair, the conversation went on for a while and they talked about everything - short breaks for kisses and then back to heartwarming stories or just regrets about the past. 

It was weird how one night could just put everything in perspective, how you could forget about everything bad and clearly see what magical thing they had going on. 

At that moment they didn’t care about anything else but them and that was exactly what they needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What, a new chapter already? I feel like spoiling you for the lack of updates before lol! 
> 
> Haha, jokes aside, I hope you like this chapter - I feel like we are coming to an end, please let me know what you think and leave a comment!
> 
> Much love, as always!


	22. The past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes it's easy to play pretend

”Oh gosh” Clarke winded as the alarms was ringing loud in the cramped dorm room.   
”I guess our honeymoon is over” Lexa hugged the blondes body from behind and placed a lazy kiss on her shoulder, still just waking up.  
”Why couldn’t you come back on a weekend?” Clarke turned around to look at Lexa who smiled at her.   
”Yeah…good question” Lexa sat up, her naked back teasing Clarke.   
”Do you know how bad I want to trow you back in this bed right now?” Her voice was still a bit raspy from her slumber.   
”Don’t” Lexa warned her but it didn’t get better as she stood up, Clarke couldn’t help but lean over and slap her ass.   
”I’m going to the shower, what are you waiting for?” Lexa turned around and smirked at her. 

The shower took longer than expected…it was their own fault or pleasure? When they realized what time it was they started to panic.   
”I don’t have time to go and get change” Clarke stood with a towel around her body and watched how Lexa got dressed.  
”Here” Lexa threw her a pair of pants. ”And…” She looked around in the drawer before Clarke was hit by a shirt in her face.  
”Hey” She laughed.   
”Just hurry” Lexa said but she had goofy smile on her face.   
”Really, this shirt?” Clarke already had it on.   
”What about it, it’s my favorite?” Lexa questioned her. ”Are you done?”   
”Yeah”   
”Let’s go then” Lexa opened the door to let them both out. ”And what about the shirt?” She asked again as they rushed through the long hallways.   
”I love it but I mean, everyone knows that this is YOUR shirt, you wear it a lot”   
”I still don’t see the problem?” Lexa was confused.  
”Everyone will know that I am wearing your shirt…” Clarke tried to get the girl to understand where she was going.  
”Yeah?” Lexa looked at her as they made a turn. ”Maybe I did it on purpose?”   
”Oh - Did you know?”   
”I’m back, we are back…I think we should let the people know right away, so they don’t go around and have their hopes up”   
”So you’re marking me?”   
”Like you marked me?” Lexa teased as she tugged her shirt down around her neck to show off the red marks.  
”Oh my” Clarke let out a heavy laugh as she was getting out of breath of them almost running.   
”Let’s call it even” Lexa winked. ”Hey we made it” Their classmates where just entering the classroom. 

They sat down next to each other, well aware of all the stares and whispering around them. To be honest Clarke couldn’t care at all - nothing else mattered right now. She had her girl back and they felt stronger than ever, even if it was new again - it felt like they fell into their old patterns directly. 

The class was boring, Lexa was focused though - but she missed a lot and she wasn’t one to settle with a bad grade. Clarke knew she would keep up in no time. Her mind however wondered to Wells who was sitting by himself, people where staring at him too. She felt bad for feeling so good, so happy - when he still probably had the same problems as before. 

She was basically his only friend here. 

When class finally ended Clarke stood up quick.

”Hey, I just need to talk to Wells” Clarke looked at Lexa who nodded, she seemed a bit curious but didn’t ask any questions.  
”Wells wait up!” The boy turned around, and he smiled at her.  
”Hey, whats up?”   
”I…” Clarke waited for some students to pass them, they walked away a bit from the crowded area to get some space. ”I just wanted to check on you, first day back in class right?”   
”Yeah, it’s fine. Just wrapping my head all around it I guess”   
”Have lunch with us later?” Clarke asked, she wanted him to be apart of their group.   
”I’d like that” Wells smiled at her when he suddenly noticed the shirt she was wearing. ”I guess things are going good between the two of you?”  
”Um…” Clarke got nervous. ”I’m sorry…”   
”Don’t apologize, I just..honestly didn’t think would hurt to see the two of you together…I was hoping that it was on a friendly level but that’s just my heart playing trick on me I guess” Wells was always so honest.   
”I didn’t want to brag it in your face…”   
”Don’t worry Clarke, I am glad you’re happy”  
”Are you…? Happy?”   
”I’m getting there, I feel like this time it will be better” He smiled. ”I’ll see you at lunch?” 

Lexa stared at the two of them talking, she was eager to know what it was about - Clarke looked serious one second, glad the other and then sad. It seemed intense but easy at the same time.   
”Oh, she’s already missing the D?” Costia walked up next to her and Lexa rolled her eyes. ”She’s never satisfied that one, is she?”   
”What is your problem?” Lexa sighed.   
”The question is, what is your problem? Can’t you see that Clarke is all problematic?”   
”Leave me alone” Lexa looked back at Wells and Clarke and ignored the girl next to her, finally as the blonde looked back at her she noticed how Costia walked away without saying another word.   
”Bitch” Lexa breathed.   
”You look tense?” Clarke lingered their arms together as they started walking towards the library, they both had some time off until their next class that they had separated.   
”Costia was the biggest mistake off my life, she just like to get on my nerve”   
”You used to love getting on my nerve”   
”I was trying to get into your pants” Lexa chuckled at the old memories.   
”Oh” Clarke looked at her. ”So Costia is trying to get into yours…again” She made a gag reflex.   
”Let’s not talk about that” Lexa wined.   
”Please” Clarke agreed.   
”What did you and Wells talk about”   
”Well so it seems like he is a bit heartbroken over us being back together, but he is happy for me and I invited him to have lunch with us”   
”I am not sure I like our old partners” Lexa wined.   
”Unfortunately we will have to live with it”   
”Yeah and we have learned our lesson about not communicate”   
”Stronger than ever babe” Clarke smiled.  
”Okay let’s not be that annoying couple that praises themselves”   
”Wouldn’t dream to be”   
”In private however” Lexa chuckled, she couldn't help but being giggly. 

”Hey girls, can I talk to you?” They looked around and saw Jake standing there.  
”Hey dad, whats up?”   
”Private please” He opened an empty class room and the girls followed him in there.   
”You’re scaring me” Clarke sat down on a chair while Lexa decided to stand.   
”So…I got some news” He took a deep breath. ”And I don’t want any of you” He looked at both of them. ”To feel any pressure about this, I will lay it out and you will have by the end of the week to decide, okay?”  
”What is it Mrs Griffin?” Lexa seemed worried.  
”Finn reached out, he is on the journey to amends for his past - he didn’t want to contact you directly out of respect but have asked me to pass the message.”  
”Are you kidding?” Lexa scoffed.   
”If you are willing to hear him out he wants to talk to both of you…” Jake looked at the disgusted and scared faces. ”Listen, I wouldn’t even bring this up if I didn’t believe this would be good for you too. I think some closure, explanation and maybe an apology can help you both move on easier”   
”Why would I want an apology from him? He is probably only doing it to get out of there…” Lexa shrugged. ”I want nothing to with him”   
”Lexa, I know he hurt you the most and that you are still hurting from what he did”   
”No disrespect but you know nothing about my hurt” Lexa didn’t like to talk about her emotions.  
”I think that you at least should think about it”   
”There is nothing to think about” Lexa was frustrated.  
”If you change your mind, you can come to me. Okay?”   
”Okay” Lexa didn’t care to fight it, she had already made up her mind.   
”Clarke?” Jake looked at her daughter.  
”Why would she - ”   
”I do” Clarke breathed and Lexa looked at her surprised.  
”Are you kidding me Clarke?   
”I wanted answers for so long and I need to close that chapter for good, can’t you see that?”   
”Unbelievable” Lexa grabbed her stuff and rushed out of the room.  
”I’ll talk to her” Clarke looked at her father who nodded, he looked as Lexa closed the door behind her like a worried father.   
”We will get her through this kid but everyone process things differently”   
”I know” Clarke smiled at her dad before she rushed after the brunette.  
”LEXA” She yelled. ”Wait” 

”I just…” Lexa was tearing up and it broke Clarke’s heart, that Finn could hurt her this much. ”Why would you even want to see him again?”   
”I just want to hear his side of the story, I need for all off this to make some sense”   
”Because you once loved him?” Lexa was always insecure about that part. the brunette had never been in love before Clarke - and she didn’t understand how you could just stop loving someone.   
”No…maybe” Clarke took Lexa’s hand to help her calm down. ”Yes, I did love Finn…and maybe that’s why I need to understand how a person can change that much, how someone can turn pure evil…I can’t go around thinking I was the reason for him too…relapse.”   
”You know that was not your fault”   
”Yes, deep down but I still need to hear it and I think it would help you heal too…you are not scared that I still love Finn, you’re scared for what it will make you feel - seeing him again.”   
”I don’t think I can face him” Lexa breathed as she locked eyes with blue.   
”I am not gonna force you babe…but if you decide to see him just know that I will be here every step of the way.” Clarke threw her arms around Lexa’s shoulders and pulled her into a hug. ”You’re not alone anymore, you hear me?”   
”Oh gosh” Lexa embraced the hug. ”You must think I am a coward”   
”I think you are the strongest person I ever met” Clarke said soothingly.   
”Do you think he has change?”   
”I hope so” Clarke sighed. ”Even if I want to punch him in the balls for what he did…he still was a good guy and I want to believe he is still in there”   
”He still deserves that punch though”   
”True” Clarke grabbed Lexa’s face in her hands and wiped away a few tears with her thumbs. ”I don’t want him to ever come between us again”   
”I won’t let him” Lexa said.   
”Good” Clarke smiled and leaned in for a soft kiss.   
”I guess we where delusional thinking we could just raise above all this huh?”   
”Sadly, we went through a lot…but that is also why I want to end it once and for all”   
”You’re right” Lexa took a few deep breaths.   
”Together” Clarke nodded.  
”Together” Lexa nodded back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again! 
> 
> A new chapter, what do you feel about the girls facing Finn? What's your wishes for that to play out? 
> 
> Take care! :)


	23. The future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke and Lexa get face to face with Finn once again.

Clarke noticed how Lexa was nervously tapping her leg up and down as they where waiting in silence. It was hard to talk during a moment like this but she put a calming hand on Lexa’s knee that made the brunette look at her instantly. 

”Hey” Clarke hushed her. ”It’s okay, I’m here”   
”I know” Lexa breathed out. ”I know” She was just about to say something else when the door cracked open and the girls turned to look at it.

Finn walked in, it was an unusual sight - seeing him, somehow healthy? He looked like he gained a few pounds but in a good way, his hair looked shinier and it seemed like his clothes was new and fresh. He didn't look as confident as he used too though, he was probably more nervous than them.

”Hi” He said quietly before he sat down in front of them, it was awkward and tense. ”Thank you for agreeing to see me” He finally did his best to look at them.   
”So?” Lexa spitted out, she got defensive really quick.   
”I am not sure how to begin…” He looked at Clarke, hoping for some comfort but she stayed ice cold. ”First of all, I am sorry…”  
”Do you think you can just walk in here and apologize?” Lexa bursted out.   
”I know that you probably wont accept it but I think that all of us could use some closure?”   
”Yes” Clarke finally spoke. ”What the hell where you thinking?”   
”Clarke…” His voice broke at the sound of her name and he looked at her like he was about to cry.  
”Don’t you dare” Lexa warned him.   
”I know I hurt you Lexa and what I did…it wasn’t me. That’s not me”   
”I beg to differ” Lexa rolled her eyes.   
”Okay okay okay…” He took a few deep breaths. ”Let me take it from the beginning?” He asked.   
”Go on” Clarke told him.  
”I was so in love with you Clarke…I was happy and what we had was everything I ever wished for…I thought I was better that my past was behind me.”   
”So why did you start again?”  
”I thought it would be harmless…we had been going out for a while, I was happy…I got offered some drugs at a party here and I thought what harm would it do? Just one time?” He took another breath. ”But it happened again the weekend after and then again…I got lost in the thrill of it, of being high and with you - until I lost myself all over again. I needed it more, it was starting to take control over me once again”   
”Why didn’t you tell me?” Clarke wondered.  
”I was ashamed…and until I knew it I was doing drugs multiple times everyday…and they explained it that I got caught up in some sort of psychosis”  
”What do you mean?” Clarke crossed her arms while Lexa could barely look at him.   
”When you left me I guess I got stuck on what mattered to me the most, you - everything I did I thought I was doing for you, that it would somehow get you to come back to me. Everything that happened around me was just background”  
”Harassing me was just nothing to you?” Lexa questioned him.  
”I didn’t understand what I was doing at the time…but I do now Lexa and…I don’t know how I can ever explain how sorry I am”   
”You’re right, you know I met a lot of drug addicts - and yes they are usually liars and bad people but at least they own up to their mistakes…they don’t blame it on the drugs”   
”I am not saying that it wasn’t me because even if I didn’t want to believe it in the beginning, I did all of those awful things”   
”For me it sounds like a lot of excuses as well” Clarke looked at him.   
”I get that, I didn’t expect you to accept my apology - I just wanted both of you to know that I am a fucked up person who fell back to the drugs and it made me do even more fucked up things. I never wanted to hurt any of you…”  
”Oh, so you didn't wish that you could get me out of the picture?” Lexa scoffed.   
”Most of my anger was tossed against you, it wasn't fair. It was not your fault that Clarke wanted you, now I am happy that she had you”  
”Finn” Clarke shook her head. ”What you did to Lexa because I liked her…I can’t even begin to how much I hate you for that, okay if you wanted to take it out on me but she was innocent in this”   
”You as well Clarke…” Finn shook his head. ”I shouldn’t had taken it out on any of you but I can’t take it back now, I am just gonna keep working on myself and try my best to grow as a person”   
”This is pointless” Lexa stood up. ”I will be perfectly fine if I never have to see your face again” She got closer to him and he looked up, he seemed scared.  
”I am sorry Lexa”   
”FUCK YOU FINN” Lexa bitchslapped him, loud and Clarke gasped in surprise but she enjoyed it still, he deserved it.  
”Okay, I deserved that” He reached for the red skin on his skin with his hand.   
”Just stay the fuck out of my life from now on?” She questioned him.   
”I’m sorry I hurt you, it will haunt me forever”   
”I hope it will, get better or something…I don’t really care” Lexa stormed out and Clarke studied Finn as he looked like a lost puppy.  
”There is no point, at least you apologized”   
”Not really how I wanted this to go but…I guess she has her reasons”  
”Indeed”   
”And I just wanted you to know, before you storm out as well that nothing of this was your fault - you couldn’t had done anything differently. I fell back by myself but I got back on my knees thanks to you and your father. I will forever be grateful”   
”Don’t waste this Finn” She looked at him serious.   
”I won’t”   
”Somewhere deep down you’re a good guy, find him - move on and…” Clarke sighed, even if she had hated him for so long - there was some good in him, she knew that. She was tired of fighting with people, she just wanted this to be over. It didn’t mean that she was happy with his apology, it simply meant that she just wanted to move on. ”Take care of yourself, alright?” She stood up.  
”You too” He stood up as well. ”Do we hug?” He looked at her.  
”No” Clarke scoffed.   
”Okay…” Finn watched as she was about to leave the room. ”I never meant for this to happen” He raised his voice.  
”But it did and now what you can do for me and especially for Lexa is to leave us alone, okay?”  
”I will”  
”Good” Clarke closed the door behind her, or closed a chapter you could say. 

First thing she wanted to do was to find Lexa again, she hoped the brunette wouldn’t be upset that she didn’t rush after immediately. As it was on the way she quickly walked outside on the yard to see if she was sitting on their bench but nothing so she rushed back to Lexa’s dorm and knocked on the door. 

Lexa opened the door and studied the blonde for a while before letting her in. The brunette lay down in her bed and Clarke followed her move in silence, they both stared up in the ceiling for a while. 

”It’s over” Clarke finally breathed.   
”Did you get the closure you where looking for?” Lexa wondered.   
”I guess” Clarke turned her body to face Lexa. ”Did you?”   
”I am just glad that I got to slap him” Lexa chuckled.   
”It was a good slap, I bet it hurt” Clarke smiled.   
”Can we put this behind us now?” Lexa’s smile disappeared and she turned to look at Clarke as well.   
”I want nothing else but to move on with you”   
”No…because it turns out I am very much in love with you Clarke Griffin” Lexa shyly smiled. ”I just want to be happy with you, don’t we deserve that?”   
”We do” Clarke got butterflies and her body felt warm, she loved when Lexa talked about her feelings about her, because sometimes she wondered if the brunette loved her as much as she loved her. ”I don’t want to lose you again”   
”We survived this, I think if we work together we can conquer anything we want”   
”One day at the time” Clarke reached for Lexa’s hand and she lingered their fingers together. ”And just so you know…I am very much in love with you too” She smiled.  
”Come here” Lexa leaned in for a soft kiss. ”I promise you that I will always be honest, no matter what, I trust you with everything”   
”And I promise to do the same” Clarke put her arm around Lexa’s waist to pull her closer. 

After that day everything seemed brighter, the days seemed sunnier and suddenly all the colors shined as bright as Clarke loved to see them. She found herself doing more art, Lexa inspired her in so many ways, not only to become stronger and more confident - but also to just appreciate the moment. 

Clarke usually wanted to control everything but it was so nice to let the control freak in her rest, she was just happy. It was a bit of a cliché but as soon as she got rid of all the negativity in her life and stayed positive - it got easier. 

Time went by and they didn’t hear a word from Finn, they slowly got back to their old patterns - hanging out with their friends on the weekend, having lunch in the cafeteria with loud laughter and silly jokes. Classes where sometimes slow but even school seemed funnier and as a lot changed in the Polis School the students seemed more happy as well, her parents really did make a change and it was making a difference. 

Clarke was especially happy that Wells made a lot of new friends, they could finally see the good in him and suddenly everyone smiled as he walked by - it was like walking next to a celebrity in the hallways. She was glad that even them could put their past behind them and that Wells had found it in his heart to forgive her after her betrayal. 

Even if Finn was probably the worst chapter in her life something good came out of it, the school upgraded and the security and care for the children grew each day. They all needed guidance and direction and the school could finally provide every student with the opportunity. 

”CLARKE” Lexa rushed up to her as she was walking out of her class.   
”Hey to you too” Clarke smiled at her wondering what she was so excited about.   
”Look at this” Lexa proudly held up a paper and Clarke grabbed it, she studied it quickly before she cheered out.  
”I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!” Clarke hugged her.   
”I finished all my fucking classes and with amazing grades” Lexa smiled into the hug, the brunette had been working so hard the last few weeks before summer to catch up.   
”I’m so proud of you babe” Clarke kissed her cheek before they let go of each other.  
”Get a room” Raven walked out of the same classroom as Clarke with Raf.   
”She did it” Clarke bursted out. ”She won’t have to take another year”   
”Hell yeah that’s amazing” Raf highfived Lexa.  
”Damn girl” Raven smiled at her. ”This we have to celebrate”   
”We have the last class today before summer break begins” Clarke grabbed Lexa’s hand. ”What about we get the crew together and celebrate in a way only we can”   
”Heck yeah Griffin, I love when you use your brain” Raven smiled at her.   
”Sounds like a plan” Raf agreed.   
”So what are we talking about?” Well’s joined them.   
”Time to celebrate that we made another year”   
”And that I fucking aced all my classes” Lexa added.   
”Yes, we are indeed gonna celebrate that” Clarke winked at her as she tried to keep her voice down hoping it would drown in the sound of students talking around them.   
”GET…A…ROOOOOOM” Raven looked at them before they all bursted out in laughter.   
”Maybe we will” Clarke smiled at her before dragging Lexa away from her friends and they laughed as Raven screamed nonsense after them.   
”So…” Lexa smirked as they finally slowed down. ”What do you want to do?”  
”Easy there, let’s finish the day first. You may be done but I still have two more classes to attend”   
”Buuuuh” Lexa pouted.   
”Do you know we have a whole summer in front of us?”   
”Not enough” Lexa pouted even more.   
”You know that I fall for that face every time, it’s not fair”   
”Oh, so we’re not gonna talk about your face?” Lexa chuckled.  
”I don’t have a face?”  
”Stop it, you know you got me wrapped around your finger”  
”So…meet me after class?” Clarke used the face, she knew exactly what face Lexa was talking about. ”And we celebrate then?”  
”Oh - I see what you are doing here, I am not going to fall for it. I used my face first” Lexa was smiling though.   
”Cooooome on” Clarke teased even more and Lexa’s face turned to the heart emoji.  
”FINE” Lexa gave up but before Clarke knew it she was pressed against one of the lockers and Lexa kissed her in a way that made her whole body weak. Clarke needed to hold on to her girlfriend to not lose control and she leaned in for another kiss, caught up in the moment.   
”Oh-no” Lexa teased her. ”See you after class missy” She smiled proudly.  
”Not fair”   
”It’s not fair to my eyes either!!” Raven had caught up to them and once again they all bursted out in laughter. 

Clarke gathered herself, she couldn’t wait for her classes to be over and to finally just have fun with her friends and Lexa, no worries, no drama - just teenagers having fun. Like it was supposed to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! 
> 
> So I decided that this will be the last chapter, I think I lost the spark with this story but it deserved an ending like I want for all my stories! 
> 
> I hope you liked this story, it always make me so happy that people want to read my fics. I do have some ideas for some future projects if you aren't too tired of me lol! 
> 
> And as always, take care of each other, much love and stay kind! 
> 
> Thank you, for reading my story. <3

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't plan to start a new fic this soon lol but it felt so empty to not have a story to create. I hope you like this one! Let me know if you want more! :)


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